Talk:Act 1: Eternal Sunshine (The Pledge)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: MarioSoulTruthFan (talk · contribs) 18:00, 16 May 2020 (UTC)

Infobox

• The official cover needs alt
  • Already has alt.
• Genre Hip hop" needs to be suported by a source
  • Removed

"What follows is a dissection of society through a hip-hop lens."Booobox source. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:16, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

• Can we call Jon Brion the producer of the album? His work was sampled, looped, whatever you want to call it...by Jay Electronica
  • Removed
• There is no need or an alternative cover when an official is already in place. There are some instances they should be added like when they are controversial, have been removed due to some problem and on this vein, wich is not happening here. "An alternative cover that is significantly different from the original and is widely distributed and/or replaces the original has generally been held to pass this criterion", not the case in here. Read here.
  • The first cover can be considered "unofficial", as it was a 2007 Myspace mixtape release. The alt cover is the commercial cover. Thus, "An alternative cover that is significantly different from the original and is widely distributed and/or replaces the original".
    • The cover was a tidal exclusive, so it fails "widely distributed". It can't e consider unnoficial because it was released along with the original release. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:39, 17 May 2020 (UTC)
      • Note the "and/or". It is significantly different from the original and it replaced the original. The cover is the commercial cover, which just happens to be exclusive to Tidal at the moment. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 23:01, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

 Done

Lead

• with no promotion → no need for it on the lead
• producer → record producer
• The album covers a range of themes, including traditional hip hop, religion, unidentified flying objects, and psychedelic drugs → taken from DjBoth source as it is an unreliable, see below
  • Adapting different subjects from different movements
• then-partner → remove
  • Changed to frequent collaborators
• (2020), was released instead nearly thirteen years later. → was released instead in 2020, nearly thirteen years later.

 Done

Background and recording

• Do you really needr Erykah Badu picture here? Its already stated below the sentence.
• Jay Electronica has said that he → Jay Electronica said he
• Jay Electronica has stated → Jay Electronica stated

 Done

Music and Compostion

• Zachary Schwartz of DJBooth → remove (see on refereces)

 Done

Themes and lyrics

• Remove the image of Elijah Muhammad (see on overall), the small text is already on the prose

There is a lot of DJ Booth references here, I advise you to remove it all first, re-write the first pragraph and once you are done let me know. It is easier.

• "Eternal Sunshine" → "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", according to the source, same for the sample
• Use reference number two after each movement, there is no need to put the reference everytime its a new sentence if you are not puting any other source in between

 Done

Release and promotion

• Fine
  • Thanks

Critical reception

• of, of and more of...
• Paul Lester of The Guardian → The Guardian's Paul Lester
• Adam Isaac Itkoff of Okayplayer → Adam Isaac Itkoff writing for Okayplayer
• In 2019, Gal Hazor of DJBooth → remove (see on refereces)
• Dhruva Balram of NME → Dhruva Balram from NME

 Done

Sequels

• Remove the poster add the "Jay Electronica debut solo album, A Written Testimony, was released in 2020, thirteen years after he announced a follow-up to Act I" to the prose and with a source
• Add 1 to the last source on the article, the genius one.

 Done

Movements

• Change the title to Track listing, you already exaplain below they are movements
  • It is not a list of tracks, there is only one track. It is a list of movements.

In the Wikipedia:WikiProject Albums/Album article style advice it doesn't say it should be called something else at any given point. The tracklist has one track, there is not a big deal. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:32, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

• Foreword → this title is not on article given
• "Eternal Sunshine" → "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind"

 Done

References

• Reference 1 and 19 are missing author
• No SHOUTING in references
• Reference 3 is not reliable. However it is an interview and I found the original interview 1. Nevertheless, it is not the full interview and to have access to that the PDF on top of the article needs to be downloaded so a note in the new source source pointing that out needs to be writen.
• Dj Booth sources have to be removed per Wikipedia:WikiProject Albums/Sources → either replace the same information or remove it
• Mising several works such as Pitchfork and NME
• The authors should be formated in last and first name parameters
  • Should, or must? I have not had this come up as an issue before.

Like I said, should, it's not a requirement. You can leave them liket that if you prefer. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:40, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

• Reference 13 is missing the paramether of subscription requeired
  • Which source? I'm having no subscription issues with any of the references.

New York Times. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 01:29, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

 Done

Overall

• The article is rather small and having 5 diferent images is quite too much
  • Does that one audio sample suffice for GA? It is non-free... I know that high-quality free media is required.

Since this is a list of movements. It's quite hard to determinate, but according to WP:Sample the "A Vorbis quality setting of 0 (roughly 64kbit/s) is usually sufficient", you have 128 kps, so that needs to be toned down. Moreover, you need to add WP:NFCC#1 and WP:NFCC#2 to the sample description. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:14, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

Do you know how to tone down the kps? Also, still asking about having free media included on the article. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 23:02, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

Found a way. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 00:09, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

• You can now address the issues. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 13:30, 17 May 2020 (UTC)
  • Addressed most issues. Thanks for the review. Will be fixing up the DJ Booth sources soon. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 19:37, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

Let me know once you deal with the DJ Booth sources. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:14, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

@MarioSoulTruthFan: I believe I've addressed everything. Is there no way to incorporate a free image? Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 23:23, 17 May 2020 (UTC)

I will do a full scan tomorrow. In the meantime, the "Rappers I Know" source is an unreliable is more of a blog than anything, you can read it on its about project, so it needs to go. You need to change the caption of the alternative cover, saying it replaces the original one and its for commercial purposes. The lead needs a second read, I will do so tomorrow and let you know a couple moe things. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 01:31, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Rappers I Know is where the mixtape was originally shared to though, so it'd be a somewhat primary source for liner notes, no? I'll remove it, but am just asking. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 10:47, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Wasn't it release in myspace? MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 11:57, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

He would host his mixtapes/songs on both Myspace and RappersIKnow according to the Boombox source. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 12:22, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

All I could find from the Myspace upload is the movement list (1). Track two is called "Eternal Sunshine", not the longer title. Also, the metadata of the original download also doesn't help with finding personnel. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 12:32, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Rappers I Know also released the mixtape on their label through Bandcamp and credit Brion as the producer. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 12:37, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Like I said I take everything they have in their website with a grain of salt, they state on their about page "The project was established in 2005 by myself and my peers in the Houston underground Hip Hop community" → doesn't come off as a reliable source at all. On a different topic, the lead says one of the themes is "love", which is not expressed in the prose of the article and also mentions Erykah Badu as a former partner, and unless he has one movement about their relantioship or mentioning the same it should be removed. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 13:06, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

@MarioSoulTruthFan: I must've overlooked that in the lede. Fixed. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 13:29, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

@Nice4What: I made some changes to the article, see if you are ok with those and let me know. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 13:57, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

@MarioSoulTruthFan: Yep, looks fine. Thank you. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 14:42, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Great, one last thing the myspace source you provided needs another one, with the same information, since the former is a Wikipedia:Verifiability#Self-published sources and needs to be verified. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 14:51, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

@MarioSoulTruthFan: I've readded the Boombox ref. Nice4What (talk · contribs) – (Thanks ♥) 14:54, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

 Done