Talk:Battle of Flores (1592)/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by Wizardman in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Khanate General (talk · contribs) 14:52, 8 December 2013 (UTC)Reply

Lead

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  • "led by initially Walter Raleigh" "Initially" should be placed next to the verb "led".
  • "including the large Portuguese Carrack Madre de Deus which was captured after a long naval battle off Flores island" "Which" introduces a nonrestrictive clause and needs a comma.
  • "The expedition, particularly the capture of the great carrack was a huge success" The parenthetical phrase is missing a comma after "carrack".
  • "and subsequent arguments of share." The clause needs a verb, like "there were subsequent arguments".

General

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  • The toolbox shows that multiple links need to be disambiguated .
  • There are problems with the sources:
    • Pages should be abbreviated p. or pp. and not pg.
    • Many of the page numbers are also missing a period after the abbreviation.
    • Some of the references are malformed, like the "[[{{subst:date}}]]" in the Hakluyt reference
    • Why are there Spanish words in a list of English language sources? "págs. 59." in the Edwards references should be "pages".
    • This is a minor nitpick, but you should cite the 2004 updated Oxford DNB instead of the outdated 1885 one.
  • The article is in need of some major copyediting. There are several grammatical and MoS issues, just in the lead alone. Contact Wikipedia:WikiProject Guild of Copy Editors.
  • File:Elizabeth1592.jpg is missing the copyright parameters.
Sorted some of this. ChrisWet (talk) 22:47, 21 December 2013 (UTC)Reply
Thank you. Could you list the changes that you've made below the comments in the bullet points? So that we can determine what still needs fixing.--Khanate General talk project mongol conquests 23:17, 21 December 2013 (UTC)Reply
Sure:
  • Pages abbreviated to p.
  • Sorted malformed reference - Hakluyt.
  • Edwards reference - Spanish words removed & replaced.
  • File:Elizabeth1592.jpg now has the correct copyright parameter.
  • Improvements in the lead as pointed out.

Will work on some more later. ChrisWet (talk) 00:00, 22 December 2013 (UTC)Reply

Has everything else been addressed? Wizardman 04:49, 27 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
I have put in a request for Wikipedia:WikiProject Guild of Copy Editors as this seems to be the only major problem left. If not, do tell what else there is. ChrisWet (talk) 11:40, 27 January 2014 (UTC)Reply
Can the clarification needed tag be addressed? If so I'll pass this assuming good faith that the copyedit will finally get done (I did a skim look in the meantime) Wizardman 02:52, 22 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
The copyedit request is in January's backlog , what clarification tag are we on about here? ChrisWet (talk) 21:05, 22 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
There's a clarification tag in the second paragraph of Expedition, placed by User:MostRecentUser on 14 February.--Khanate General talk project mongol conquests 07:59, 23 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Done. Complicated given the nature of a joint stock venture. ChrisWet (talk) 13:11, 23 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Passing now that the copyedit has (finally) been done. Wizardman 05:39, 2 March 2014 (UTC)Reply