Talk:Cliché (Hush Hush)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Carbrera (talk · contribs) 21:11, 24 September 2016 (UTC)

Carbrera, Any chance you'll get to this soon? Cartoon network freak (talk) 06:24, 16 October 2016 (UTC)

Of course! Sorry for the delay! Carbrera (talk) 05:01, 17 October 2016 (UTC)

Carbrera Not wanting to bother you, but there are two weeks gone since your last message. Cartoon network freak (talk) 17:51, 29 October 2016 (UTC)

Initial comments

• Remove the extra space in between the quotation mark and Cliché (Hush Hush) in the infobox
• "with her also appearing injured on various Romanian television" --> This sentence doesn't make sense
• "the singer eventually decided to take a break from her career." --> "Due to this, the singer eventually decided to take a break from her career."
• "Meanwhile, Cliché (Hush Hush), her last record under Prodan's label—Maan Studio—was made available for consumption in Japan on 2 October 2013;[1]" --> This sounds like it was released as a studio album rather than a reissue of one
• "three songs" --> "three new songs" (Does this sound alright to you?)
• "The physical edition of Cliché (Hush Hush)" --> "The physical edition of the record"
• " it peaked at number one in Bulgaria,[13] and within the top forty in Hungary,[14] Italy,[15] Japan[16] and Slovakia,[17] being eventually certified Gold by the Federation of the Italian Music Industry (FIMI) for selling 15,000 copies in Italy.[18." --> Perhaps break this up into two sentences? It's a bit long and crowded
• "comparasion" --> Not a word (Did you mean "comparisons"?)

I think this is clear; that's what the translated source says. She kinda looks like in a scene of vampire films here. Cartoon network freak (talk) 17:08, 30 October 2016 (UTC)

• "vampire films for teenagers" --> What do you mean by this?
• "A "club-friendly" electro dance recording,[23] the last single from Cliché (Hush Hush) premiered on 1 May 2013,[6] featuring the vocal collaboration of Prodan's fictional character, Manilla Maniacs.[3]" --> "A "club-friendly" electro dance recording,[23] the last single from Cliché (Hush Hush) premiered on 1 May 2013[6] and featured the vocals of Prodan's fictional character, Manilla Maniacs.[3]"
• You should probably state the name of the single in the above sentence because without it, it sounds quite confusing
• "The song's music video was compared to the works of Madonna, while its choreography to Michael Jackson's 1980s material.[23]" --> Note who made this comparison since there seems to be only one person who thought this
• The "Credits and personnel" section should be placed below "Track listing"
• "All lyrics written by Nemirschi and Prodan, unless stated.[3]" --> "All lyrics written by Andrei Nemirschi and Prodan, unless stated.[3]" (You never mentioned this Andrei Nemirschi guy until now)
• Remove the title of the album before " – Standard version[1]" to remain consistent
• I believe you could combine the two charts for "Release history"

References

• Ref #1 – Link "iTunes Store" here and remove any other links to it elsewhere
• Is it really necessary to group several citations together?

This is a better solution (also used in some FAs) to avoid listing like 8 citations after one fact. Cartoon network freak (talk) 17:09, 30 October 2016 (UTC)

• Ref #4, #5, #6 – "iTunes Store" should never be italicized
• Ref #21 – "YouTube" should never be italicized and it should be unlinked here

ON HOLD – Sorry for the delay. Please ping me so I can reread it when you're done. Regards, Carbrera (talk) 04:18, 30 October 2016 (UTC).

@Carbrera: All done and responded to some of your comments. Best regards, Cartoon network freak (talk) 17:10, 30 October 2016 (UTC)