Talk:Jay Civetti/GA1

Latest comment: 6 years ago by MWright96 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 21:33, 4 February 2018 (UTC)Reply

Going to read this over and will leave comments soon. MWright96 (talk) 21:33, 4 February 2018 (UTC)Reply

  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  

Lead

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  • Perhaps you could expand the lead further to include the achievements Civetti has achieved as coach of the Tufts

Pre-tufts career

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  • "Civetti is a native of Wellesley, Massachusetts and attended Belmont Hill School in Belmont, Massachusetts"
  • "Having being recruited by legendary Division III football coach Don Miller" = legendary is POV per MOS:PUFF
  • "After graduating from Trinity in 2001 with an English degree" - reword this sentence so it reads as follows After graduating from Trinity with an English degree in 2001,
  • "and earned a Master's degree in education" - remove the capital letter from "Master's degree"
  • "While at Boston College, Civetti helped coach a future NFL Most Valuable Player, quarterback Matt Ryan." - While at Boston College, Civetti helped coach quarterback Matt Ryan, a future NFL Most Valuable Player.

Tufts career

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  • "In 2009 – after Tufts' season had already ended –" - In 2009 – after the conclusion of the Tufts' season –
  • "Civetti returned to NC State" - Wikilink NC State to NC State Wolfpack football
  • "to snap its 31-game losing stream" - to break its 31-game losing streak
  • "The Jumbos also beat the Middlebury Panthers," - defeated
  • "On October 29, 2016, Tufts beat the Amherst Purple and White, 27–10, for the first time since 2007." - try On October 29, 2017, Tufts beat the Amherst Purple and White team for the first time since 2007 in a 27–10 victory.
  • "In 2016, Civetti coached the Jumbos to a 7–1 record and second-place finish in the NESCAC," - That year, Civetti coached the Jumbos to a second-place finish in the NESCAC with a 7–1 record,
  • "Four other players were also named to the All-NESCAC first team including senior" _ add a comma between the words "including" and "senior"

References

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  • Be consistent in how you present the publication and access dates as you cannot have dates like 2017-05-05 28 November 2009 used sparingly
  • ESPN, Bleacher Report, FanBuzz, Tufts University Athletics & NESCAC should be in the publication field and not the work nor website field

On hold until there has been a response to all the points raised above. MWright96 (talk) 18:21, 7 February 2018 (UTC)Reply