Talk:La Galissonnière-class ironclad/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: JonCatalán^(Talk) 07:05, 11 October 2010 (UTC)

Comments:

• More of the routine copyediting; feel free to revert what you disagree with.
• I added that this class was meant as a heavier armed version of the Alma, to the lead.
• "The crew of all three ships numbered between 352 and 382 officers and men." → This makes it seem as if this was the crew of all three ships combined? Is this your intention? If it's not, since the topic is the class itself, "all three ships" is redundant (all three ships are already de facto included under the umbrella of the class).
• The same goes for other instances where you mention "all three ships". If you don't specify it should be inferred that you mean all three ships. The only situation in where it matters to discuss the ships individually is where one ship differs from the other.
• I noticed on other articles, as well. Why are some units converted, and others aren't (I understand that you generally don't repeat conversions, but some units go unconverted even previously unmentioned).
• Change: "They supplied landing parties during the Battle of Tamsui in October 1884, but they were forced to retreat by Chinese troops, albeit at only a few casualties..." → "They supplied landing parties during the Battle of Tamsui in October 1884, but they were forced to retreat by Chinese troops, although suffering few casualties..."
• Lead image is pd, although I would soon add in that now standard information table that has to be filled out.

Otherwise, the article looks fine. JonCatalán^(Talk) 07:14, 11 October 2010 (UTC)