Template:Did you know nominations/G-Class Melbourne tram

The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.

The result was: promoted by SL93 (talk) 01:40, 10 November 2022 (UTC)

G-Class Melbourne tram

Created by EchidnaLives (talk). Self-nominated at 09:16, 19 October 2022 (UTC).

  • The article is new enough and long enough and is free of close paraphrasing. Since this is the nominator's first DYK nomination, no QPQ is required here. The paragraph that mentions the hook fact (the first sentence of the "Design" section) requires a footnote for DYK purposes. However, my main concern with the hook is that it doesn't seem to be a hook that appeals to a broad audience. Specifically, it seems to appeal more to train fans/foamers and may not necessarily catch the attention of non-specialists. Perhaps a new hook is needed here? I could ask for assistance from a train editor like Trainsandotherthings to see if anything else in the article is usable. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 11:08, 22 October 2022 (UTC)
I'll be blunt, the hook here is not interesting to a general audience. It's an unremarkable fact and even I, a train editor, don't find it interesting. What might be usable is "The initial contract includes 100 new trams, which will be the largest order in state history". With that said, I don't see anything here particularly hooky. Trainsandotherthings (talk) 13:27, 22 October 2022 (UTC)
Looking at the original hook again, I definitely agree that it is extremely uninteresting. But the largest order in state history could work, especially since Victoria has a lot of history with trams. Maybe something like that the Victorian Government has ordered 100 G-Class Trams, which is the largest order in state history?. That would probably need to be rephrased to work, but it might have potential. Again, this is my first nomination and I am unexperienced in DYK, but hopefully the article can work. echidnaLives - talk - edits 07:37, 26 October 2022 (UTC)
Added ALT 1, same as what I replied with before. echidnaLives - talk - edits 07:37, 26 October 2022 (UTC)
I'm not the reviewer per se, but I have no objection to that hook. Trainsandotherthings (talk) 12:56, 2 November 2022 (UTC)
Thanks @Trainsandotherthings for your reply. @Narutolovehinata5: what do you think? echidnaLives - talk - edits 22:12, 3 November 2022 (UTC)
@EchidnaLives: If TAOT has no objections then this has my seal of approval. I think the only thing that needs clarification here is to link to Victorian government, since it's ambiguous enough that readers may not immediately get that this is referring to the Australian state. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 02:56, 5 November 2022 (UTC)
@Narutolovehinata5: Thanks for your reply. I've added the link. Is this good, or would you prefer if Victoria (Australia) was linked instead? echidnaLives - talk - edits 08:13, 5 November 2022 (UTC)
Maybe change it to "Victoria State Government" without the pipe? Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 09:15, 5 November 2022 (UTC)
@Narutolovehinata5: Done, is it good to go? echidnaLives - talk - edits 02:39, 7 November 2022 (UTC)
To me at least it's okay, but since Trainsandotherthings is the subject expert I'd like to defer final approval to him this time. Narutolovehinata5 (talk · contributions) 09:30, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
In that case, I'm going to mark this approved. Thanks for working with me on a new hook, EchidnaLives. Trainsandotherthings (talk) 14:13, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
  • EchidnaLives the source only says this is the largest investment in locally made trams, so there might have been larger orders for trams manufactured elsewhere.
Getting the ping right: @Trainsandotherthings and EchidnaLives: -- RoySmith (talk) 18:16, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
Thanks for seeing this RoySmith. I must of gotten the source wrong, but I'm pretty sure it is true. I'll find a new source soon, because I'm a bit busy right now. Hopefully it is actually true and I haven't just misread everything... echidnaLives - talk - edits 20:03, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
Pinging @Trainsandotherthings, Narutolovehinata5, and RoySmith:. Well, shit. Unfortunately the claim was from an unreliable source, which was false. It is the largest order constructed in Australia.[1] [2]Sorry about this everyone, I should of confirmed it more, and I will be updating the article accordingly. Would the hook still be good if we just added the word "local" before order, and instead of state history we did Australian history? Thanks, and sorry again, echidnaLives - talk - edits 22:20, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
Could you write that out as ALT2; that'll make it easier to review. Thanks. -- RoySmith (talk) 22:55, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
@RoySmith: Done. echidnaLives - talk - edits 23:00, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
Thanks. I've added ALT2a, which uses "domestic" instead of "local". At least to my (American) ear, that seems more accurate. Trainsandotherthings could you approve those? -- RoySmith (talk) 23:05, 9 November 2022 (UTC)
I think ALT2 and ALT2A appropriately deal with the issues from ALT1 (which I really should have caught myself, but that's why we have hooks reviewed multiple times). Trainsandotherthings (talk) 23:45, 9 November 2022 (UTC)

References

  1. ^ Roberts, Peter (2022-04-21). "Victoria announces Australia's biggest-ever local tram order". Australian Manufacturing Forum. Retrieved 2022-11-09.
  2. ^ Nestor, Stephanie (2022-04-21). "Contract awarded for Australia's largest tram project". Infrastructure Magazine. Retrieved 2022-11-09.