|1 =
"Please explain your reasoning as to your statement that my proof that 1,239,353,098.07 angels can dance on the head of a pin is wrong (you should see the .07 moonwalk)."
— Wehwalt
|2 =
"Yes, every little boy or girl is going to choose read an encyclopedia around Christmas-time. I remember, as a child, poring over air traffic corridor maps and geo-stationary weather satellites, plotting out where best to calculate the speed/weight ratio of Santa's sleigh in a high atmosphere trajectory. As well, me and my younger sisters debated endlessly over the slipstream design of reindeer in mid-flight, usually ending in frying pans as weapons, crying and copious amounts of coal. Which was okay, since we were living in a cold-water hovel in the 19th century, and coal allowed us to stay alive until Spring. There's heart-breaking, and there's illuminating. If parents don't want their young-uns to learn the truth about Santa, Republicans or what a pee-pee or hoo-hoo looks like, there are enough parental controls out there to block access to Wikipedia until the little tykes start sprouting chin hair and make appearances on the Jerry Springer Show."
— Arcayne on protecting Santa Claus at Christmastime
|3 =
"Given the inherent heat that surrounds anything remotely to do with Israel on Wikipedia, I anticipate an increased volume of vandalism on tomorrow's Main Page article."
"In related news, water found to be wet."
— Gurch in response to Dweller
|4 =
"An admin deleted one of my articles because I had no sources. How can I add a source if there are none in existence?"
— Anonymous
|5 =
"That particular scenario suggests a level of sheer idiocy that hasn't actually been suggested by anyone. Are you really saying that we're promoting such moronic editors? I seriously can't picture a new admin going 'what the hell is that? Well, I better just delete everything'."
— EVula on admins editing MediaWiki files
|6 =
"In Soviet Russia, edit conflicts YOU!"
— Xeno
|7 =
"If the person doesn't know the MediaWiki namespace exists, isn't he or she unlikely to edit it?"
"Until that unfortunate moment where he stumbles upon it and, finding it full of gibberish or a useless duplicate of the real site interface, deletes its contents."
— Centrx in response to Newyorkbrad
|8 =
"...trying to debate such issues with such people is like mud wrestling with a pig — you just get dirty, and the pig likes it."
— Realkyhick on being at wit's end
|9 =
"What a lovely person, and such well-written comments. I propose we offer the editor some nice cookies and milk and maybe he/she will cool down and become a useful and valuable editor. Support indef-block."
— Tony Fox on upping a block from two days to indef
|10 =
"Delete, non-notable, although the creator has tried hard to make the subject appear so.
"Through such nefarious tactics as citing coverage by reliable third party sources?"
— Sarcasticidealist in response to Anonymous
|11 =
"Policy is like sausage: nobody really wants to know what goes into making it."
— Kelly Martin
|12 =
"What consenting mathematicians get up to behind closed doors is their business, but please don't do it in public."
— Dweller at Wikipedia talk:Requests for adminship
|13 =
"...without content, Wikipedia is just Facebook for ugly people."
— Iridescent
|14 =
"WTF - I'm away for 12 hours and my talkpage has gone up to 100k because of (young, barnstar happy, cabalish, puppet like editors arguing that they are not young, barnstar happy, cabalish, puppet like editors) this?"
"Yeah but it's only like 50K if take out the signatures ;)"
— Metros in response to Iridescent
|15 =
"The querist is obviously concerned that there is no article on understanding women. I am working on this article, but I am not sure if there will be enough space on the Wikipedia servers..."
— Michael of Lucan
|16 =
"Although the page is a bit ridiculous, but it is a bit of an inside joke. I see no reason why to delete it, as no person would accidentally look up something so specific..."
— Keegan turner-wood after the article was speedy-tagged
|17 =
"A deletion discussion is currently underway for the page that allows notices such as this to appear at the top of people's watchlists."
— Deskana at Watchlist-details
|18 =
"I'd be more than happy to make you an administrator. Just head over to WP:RFA and I'll get back to you in a week."
— EVula at Wikipedia talk:Requests for adminship
|19 =
"This edit is made simply in the hopes that it causes an edit conflict."
— Tanthalas39 at User talk:Keeper76
|20 =
"I need to let you know I am an Investigative Reporter and I have received a newstip about the Wikipedia Adminstrators being too harsh on their users. I know you're probably not the right people to talk to about that but I had to make that announcement on this talk page. Thank You."
"Right. I have some ocean front property in Arizona I'm looking to unload..."
— S. Dean Jameson in response to an indef-blocked user
|21 =
"There's a difference between an inside joke and a joke shared between the many residents inside your own head."
— Nar Matteru
|22 =
"I have formulated a way to travel forward in time about an hour every 3600 seconds!"
— Gunrun at Wikipedia:Reference desk/Computing
|23 =
"You could replace every Neutral with Balding Aardvark With Indigestion and it won't matter one bit (other than causing massive confusion)."
— EVula on the significance of the Neutral section in RFAs
|24 =
"Meanwhile, while you're waiting for that to happen, here's an eyedropper. Please move the Atlantic to the Pacific. After you somehow manage that, you'll likely have some time left, so at that point, move the Atlantic back."
— jc37
|25 =
"If you are too cool, put on a sweater."
— Mangojuice in response to an unblock request
|26 =
"Before you edit others people's work try getting your puncuaction and grammer right. This isn't kindergarten." [sic]
— CTFC at User talk:Sillyfolkboy
|27 =
"Then there's that guy, Antonio Bastardo, (also at DYK) who we all know for... uh..."
"Surviving elementary school?"
— IP in response to Candlewicke
|28 =
"If you find that you are one of the members of the online community feeling upset, my best advice is to go outside, wander around, smell some flowers and watch the little birds who live their entire lives without caring at all about Wikipedia."
— Franamax at WT:AN
|29 =
"When you stick your head in the sand your arse makes a good target."
— Malleus Fatuorum
|30 =
"I'd rather have an admin that tells the occasional troll to go fuck themselves, then some civil-police jerkoff who lets them run rampant."
— Tanthalas39
|31 =
"To be fair, it does say that he is 4 years old on his userpage."
— America69
|32 =
"What is it with all the talk about body parts? At least be original; call someone a pathetic fractured calcaneus or a festering islet of Langerhans."
— Short Brigade Harvester Boris
|33 =
"I'm tempted to oppose as there's a distinct lack of excitement and drama for this RfA so far. I would like to see [him] forged into an admin through a real trial by fire. There's still time so hope remains..."
— ChildofMidnight
|34 =
"Amazing how an admin posting two words produces a debate on the mortality rates of cattle."
— Candlewicke
|35 =
"Wikipedia aims at consensus, and for that namby-pamby reason rejects mass slaughter as a solution."
— Michael of Lucan
|36 =
"I'd be tempted to indef both of them for taking the piss."
— Black Kite on a rather lame editwar
|37 =
"Alternatively replace DYK with a picture of paint drying, though this might over-stimulate our regular readership."
— RMHED
|38 =
"Life's a bitch and it's full of dishonesty, idiocy, and the plain ludicrous. But so what? Surely you already knew that? I really don't think you're helping your case by making it so plain that you care what others think."
— Malleus Fatuorum