The loss of a pet or an animal to which one has become emotionally bonded oftentimes results in grief[1] which can be comparable with the death of a human loved one, or even greater, depending on the individual. The death can be felt more intensely when the owner has decided to end the pet's life through euthanasia.[2] While there is strong evidence that animals can feel such loss for other animals,[3] this article focuses on human feelings when an animal is lost, dies, or otherwise is departed.

Wealthy Ancient Egyptian families would mummify their treasured pets, believing that the spirit would travel with them to the afterlife.

Effect of animal loss on humans

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There is no set amount of time for the grieving process to occur. However, mourning is much more intense for a pet upon whom the owner was emotionally dependent. Additionally, some pet owners may feel unable to express their grieving due to social customs and norms surrounding pets. If the pet owner internalizes the grief, the suffering increases.[4]

The stages of grief proposed by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross were designed in relation to human death but can be adapted to describe the grief process for the death of a pet.[5] Indeed, pet death includes several lessons: 1) the relationship rather than the object (the animal) is central to understanding the loss; 2) the manner of death/loss will affect the grieving process; 3) the age and living situation of the bereaved will affect the grieving process.[6]

The University of Michigan did a study of grief involving 174 adults who had deceased pets. Participants were administered a modified CENSHARE Pet Attachment Survey. Results indicate that 85.7% of owners initially experienced at least one symptom of grief, but the occurrence decreased to 35.1% at six months and 22.4% at one year. Males and females reported different rates on six of the 12 symptoms surveyed. The severity and length of symptoms were significantly correlated with the degree of attachment to the deceased pet. These findings indicate that pet loss can be a potential clinical concern, especially if the person's attachment to the pet is strong.[7]

Coping with death

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Though well-meaning phrases like "time heals all wounds" can upset the grieving pet owner, the one factor required for all coping strategies is indeed time.[8] Coping also involves understanding the emotions surrounding the loss of a pet, and then accepting the emotions to focus towards positive solutions.

Coping strategies may include:[9]

  • Going through the grieving process
  • Strengthening positive memories
  • Seeking support from resources, organizations, and individuals
  • Seeking solace from one's own spiritual beliefs
  • Preparing for a pet's death in advance

Pet owners may also seek to memorialize their pets by placing their remains in a cremation urn or jewelry.[10] Other traditions include erecting stone memorials or other commemorative plaques for deceased pets, or by nicknaming objects like stars after them.[11][12] Additionally, a 2020 report found that 19% of Americans wanted to be buried with their pet's remains after passing.[13]

Types of loss

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Typical posting for a lost pet

There are several particular types of loss:[14][15]

  • Pet is missing (considered an unresolved loss)
  • Pet is lost through divorce/separation[16]
  • Pet is accidentally injured or killed
  • Pet is willfully injured or killed
  • Pet is stolen
  • Pet dies naturally
  • Pet is euthanized
  • Pet becomes very ill

Getting a new animal

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Before bringing a new pet into the home following the death of a previous pet, some advise people to consider the timing carefully.[17] Additionally, it is recommended to consider where the bereaved are in the grieving process,[18] and to choose the new pet for its own unique qualities rather than trying to replace the former pet.[19]

Workplace issues

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Pet illness and death are gradually becoming recognized as similar to other forms of sickness and death in the family. In the U.K., a variety of companies provide paid leave for such eventualities,[20] with employment tribunals backing this in some instances in which employment terms did not specifically mention pet loss.[21]

Recent studies by insurers suggest that up to one in four pet owners are sufficiently affected by pet loss or illness to take time off, but many feel this will be treated lightly and, hence, state they were sick. According to Petplan, 35% of people admitted to taking time off work to settle new pets into the home or care for sick pets, and half admitted to taking a whole week off.[22] According to Direct Line, one in four pet owners, "said they have been too upset to go into the workplace when their four legged friend died" and, "many of those who did go into work after the death of their pet said they were unproductive."[23] The latter survey also noted that pet owners in the U.K. take "around 8 days off" due to grief at the death of a pet and that "seventy-nine percent of people responding to the survey admitted they did not think their boss would be sympathetic, and the only way they could get time off work was by... pretending to be ill."[22]

Pet loss resources

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Resources for pet loss change regularly but include grief counseling, support groups, online forums, hotlines, and books. The Pet Loss Support Page maintains an updated list of recommended resources.[24]

Resources include:

  • Hotlines: Several veterinary schools and nonprofit agencies in the United States have pet loss support hotlines.
  • Online forums: Internet search engines using "pet loss support" as a search term will locate several online forums for grieving pet owners. Also, there are digital memorial websites for pets. The online community allows one to create a profile, compiling images, details, and memories of the lost pet in one place.[citation needed]
  • Books: Books on pet loss are published regularly.[25]
  • Grief Counseling: Therapists with grief therapy training can be found in local communities. In addition, therapists may also include support groups that meet regularly to discuss issues surrounding pet loss.
  • Hospices: Some animal hospices offer grief support.
  • Websites: Organizations may have webpages with various resources for grieving pet owners[citation needed]

Beliefs about non-human death

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A mummified cat

Some world religions have held that beloved pets will join their families in an afterlife. Animal worship was common in the ancient world, influencing the burial practices of animals. Animal mummification was practiced in ancient Egypt and gave special significance to cats in some areas. Egyptians believed that mummification was imperative in order to gain admittance to the afterlife, ensuring the animals' immortality.[26]

Some ancient Egyptian families believed mummified pets would keep the deceased company in the afterlife.[27] The most common Egyptian pets included cats, dogs, mongooses, monkeys, gazelles, and birds. Many Egyptians loved their pets, and, according to the Greek observer Herodotus, the customary process of mourning the loss of a loved pet included crying and shaving one's eyebrows. [citation needed] Ancient Egyptian pets were given names like humans name pets today, evidenced by over 70 names deciphered in inscriptions identifying mummified pet dog remains.[28]

Modern religions are divided as to whether non-human animals have souls, the ability to reincarnate, or existence in the afterlife.

In the absence of a common religious belief, many pet owners have embraced the concept of the Rainbow Bridge. The idea, the origin of which is not clearly known, speaks of a metaphorical or mythical place of reunion where deceased pets die live in a paradisical version of limbo, rejuvenated and free of pain and suffering until their companion humans arrive upon their own deaths.[29][30] At this point, the pet(s) run to their companion humans and they enter Heaven together never to be parted again.

A number of deathbed visions and dreams involve sightings of deceased pets; hence, some link these reports with the existence of animal souls. Such experiences may be effective in easing one's grief.[31][32]

In Mormonism, all organisms (as well as the entire planet Earth) are believed to have a spirit, but that beings without the gift of free agency—the ability to know and choose between right and wrong—are innocent, unblemished spirits who go straight to Heaven when they die.[33] According to Mormon beliefs, animals will be resurrected along with humans at the end of days.[34]

Animal chaplains are becoming increasingly popular for helping bereaved family members deal with the loss of their pet by providing memorial services, spiritual reassurance, and grief counseling.

See also

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References

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  1. ^ Pet loss and human emotion: a guide to recovery by Cheri Barton Ross, p.17
  2. ^ "A pet owners anguish" Archived August 24, 2011, at the Wayback Machine, Pets in Peace, accessed April 25, 2011;
  3. ^ The emotional lives of animals by Marc Bekoff, p. 63
  4. ^ The Loss of a Pet By Wallace Sife p. 37
  5. ^ The Loss of a Pet By Wallace Sife p. 45
  6. ^ Death and Dying, Life and Living By Charles A. Corr, Clyde Nabe, Donna M. Corr p. 261
  7. ^ Grieving Pet Death: Normative, Gender, and Attachment Issues. Wrobel, T. A., & Dye, A. L. (2015, October 25)
  8. ^ Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet By Moira Anderson Allen, p. 32
  9. ^ Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet By Moira Anderson Allen
  10. ^ "Pet Memorials - Pet Urns and Jewelry - Perfect Memorials". perfectmemorials.com. Retrieved 2022-09-03.
  11. ^ Garcia, Gabriela (2022-08-16). "6 adorable keepsakes to remember your pets forever and ever". Curiocity. Retrieved 2022-09-03.
  12. ^ Gallagher, Tyler (November 9, 2020). "5 Ways To Create a Wow! Customer Experience". Authority Magazine.
  13. ^ "How Americans Are Burying Their Pets In 2021". Choice Mutual. 22 March 2021. Retrieved 5 December 2022.
  14. ^ Pet Loss and Children: Establishing a Healthy Foundation By Cheri Barton Ross, p. 64
  15. ^ Ross, Cheri Barton; Baron-Sorensen, Jane (1998). Pet Loss And Human Emotion: Guiding Clients Through Grief - Cheri Ross - Google Books. Taylor & Francis. ISBN 9781560326526. Retrieved 2012-10-13.
  16. ^ "What Happens to Pets When Couples Break Up". VOA Learning English. Retrieved 23 October 2024.
  17. ^ Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet By Moira Anderson Allen, p. 48
  18. ^ Starting Out Right with Your New Dog: A Complete Guide, by Susan McCullough, p. 16
  19. ^ "How To Cope With The Loss Of A Pet?", Cloud 9 Vets, accessed April 4, 2011;
  20. ^ "A number of large businesses have begun to allow their employees 'peternity' leave, in order to look after sick pets or take them to the vets. London delivery company The Courier Service introduced a "peternity" policy last July that lets workers claim two days' paid annual leave. Denise Fresco, human resources manager, said: 'It is awarded in the same way people might need time off for a baby or to look after a child.' Meanwhile, the Bank of Scotland allow workers to take time off work for sick pets, so long as they organise cover. Royal Mail has also said that it will consider allowing 'compassionate leave' if a pet dies." workplacelaw.com Jan 2007 Archived 2007-02-09 at the Wayback Machine
  21. ^ "In September 2006, Royal Mail had to pay employee David Portman an undisclosed amount for firing him after he took a week off work following the death of his dog. The week's absence, the last in a series of absences, happened in 2004 and Portman was dismissed from his job as a result. Portman’s lawyer argued that many of the previous absences were a result of workplace injuries and that Royal Mail's own procedures say that time off following bereavement is not counted against an employee's sickness record. The tribunal ruled Portman had been off for legitimate reasons and that Royal Mail had failed to understand and apply its own policy." workplacelaw.com Jan 2007 Archived 2007-02-09 at the Wayback Machine
  22. ^ a b "workplacelaw.com Jan 2007". Archived from the original on 2007-02-09. Retrieved 2007-02-11.
  23. ^ The London Paper (thelondonpaper.com) and The Scotsman, 9 Feb: survey of 1100 dog owners by Direct Line.
  24. ^ The Pet Loss Support.
  25. ^ Medicine, Purdue Veterinary. "Pet Loss Books". Purdue University College of Veterinary Medicine. Retrieved 2024-10-01.
  26. ^ Dunand, Francoise, Roger Lichtenberg, and Jean Yoyotte. Mummies and Death in Egypt. New York: Cornell University Press, 2007.
  27. ^ Lawrence, Susan V. "Unraveling the Mysteries of the Mummies." Science News, Society for Science and the Public 118 (1980): 362-64.
  28. ^ Arnold, Dorothea. "An Egyptian Bestiary." The Metropolitan Museum of Art Bulletin new 52 (1995): 1-64.
  29. ^ Planet Cat: A CAT-alog by Sandra Choron, Harry Choron, Arden Moore, p. 389
  30. ^ "Online Memorials" Archived April 7, 2011, at the Wayback Machine, An analysis of Pets in Peace online memorials reveals 30% express a desire or belief that they will be re-united in an afterlife, this includes 2% that explicitly mention the Rainbow Bridge, breakdown calculated April 9, 2011;
  31. ^ Christopher Kerr, Carine Mardorossian, 2020, Death Is But a Dream: Finding Hope and Meaning at Life's End, Avery Publishing
  32. ^ "Near Death Experiences: Will Our Dogs be Waiting For us?". The Bark. 2020-08-01. Archived from the original on 2020-11-26. Retrieved 2024-04-22.
  33. ^ Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, p. 291
  34. ^ Sacred Truths of the Doctrine and Covenants Vol. II, p.38
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