Talk:10-pounder Parrott rifle

Latest comment: 1 year ago by Djmaschek in topic GA Review

GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:10-pounder Parrott rifle/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 08:29, 9 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

I'll get to this shortly--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 08:29, 9 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

  • Images properly licensed
      Not sure Is everything in order?
    I'd have said something if something needed to be done.
  • Link muzzle-loading rifled cannon, smoothbore, gunpowder, windage, ordnance, breech, trunnion, muzzle, lands and grooves, Ordnance Dept., rimbase, state of Virginia, carriage, trail, cheek pieces, sabot, caisson, limber, forge, howitzer
      Partly done Add links: muzzleloader, rifled cannon, smoothbore, gunpowder, windage, ordnance/artillery, chamber/breech, trunnion, muzzle, lands and grooves/rifling, Ordnance Dept., (no rimbase link), Virginia, gun carriage, (replaced trail & cheek pieces with gun carriage), sabot, limbers and caissons, forge. (Cannot find howitzer.)
    Howitzer, I suggest combining the separate links for muzzle-loading and rifled cannon into Muzzle-loading rifle
      Done muzzle-loading rifle is now in the first sentence of the introduction.
      Not sure I believe the only places I used the word howitzer were M1841 12-pounder howitzer and M1841 24-pounder howitzer. If the term is used somewhere else, please specify the section and I will add the link. Thanks.
    See this glossary of Civil War artillery terms definitions of rimbase and other terms like pendulum hausse. If possible, explain how the improved sights worked and why the original sights were changed.
    Thanks. I bookmarked that link.   Done I rechecked the source and added more details. The source said the new sight was improved, but didn't fully explain why.
  • hyphenate cast iron, wrought iron
      Not done The names of the Wikipedia articles for these 2 terms are not hyphenated, so it isn't clear why this is necessary.
    In this form, they're a compound adjective modifying cannon, just like muzzle-loading. There are redirects for the hyphenated form
      Done For the noun, it's cast iron; for the adjective, it's cast-iron, etc.
  • Projectile weights and range should be saved for the main body, IMO
      Done Removed from introduction paragraph.
  • inflicting injury passive voice
      Done Rewrote phrase.
  • Flexible isn't the appropriate term when discussing metallurgy. Use brittle and ductile with links
      Done Link brittle and ductility.
  • What's a pendulum hausse rear sight?
      Not sure I cannot find an explanation anywhere. I just used "rear sight".
      Done Added "pendulum hausse" back in, but without explaining what it is, since the source didn't explain. In any case, it was replaced by an apparently superior system that I described.
  • The caliber was the same as that of a smoothbore 3-pounder gun, which fired a round shot with a diameter of 2.9 inches Why is this relevant or important?
      Done Sentence re-phrased so it hopefully made more sense.
  • Can you elaborate on the different ammunition makers and why Schenkl was barred from use?
      Done Rewrote this. Actually, both Schenkl and Hotchkiss shells were unsuitable for use with Parrott rifles. Added reason why Hotchkiss was not used, but source did not explain why Schenkl was also bad.
    Better, but what does "too great an impact" actually mean? Did it tend to separate the shell from the sabot or something?
      Done Added: Number of rifling grooves was different for 10-pounder Parrott and 3-inch Ordnance rifle. Hotchkiss sabot was torn off when fired from a 10-pounder Parrott.
  • Move this to the beginning of the Specifications section: The 10-pounder Parrott rifle was a muzzle-loader.
      Done
  • 57 10-pounder spell out the quantity or reword the sentence so that the quantity and name aren't adjacent
      Done Rewrote sentence.
  • A couple of duplicate links
      Not sure Please be specific.
    this script will indentify them for you
      Done I added this to my common.js page. One duplicate link was found and removed.
  • What makes civilwarhome reliable?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 17:43, 15 August 2023 (UTC)Reply
      Done Removed or replaced all civilwarhome citations and moved it to Further reading.

Edit1

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The civilwarhome ref was moved to Further reading and other sources were used. Add more detail about ammunition types. Questioned why hyphenation was requested. Why 2.9-inch caliber was used. More fixes are coming. Djmaschek (talk) 21:25, 15 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

Edit2

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Add remaining suggested fixes, with a few exceptions. See above. Djmaschek (talk) 00:34, 16 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

@Sturmvogel 66: I think I'm done. Please let me know if there is anything else that needs to be fixed. Djmaschek (talk) 00:43, 16 August 2023 (UTC)Reply
Still a few things to clarify.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 11:13, 16 August 2023 (UTC)Reply

Edit3

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@Sturmvogel 66: Added more corrections and details. See notes above. Djmaschek (talk) 21:45, 18 August 2023 (UTC)Reply