Talk:2003 Subway 400

Latest comment: 4 years ago by MrLinkinPark333 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:2003 Subway 400/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: MrLinkinPark333 (talk · contribs) 02:09, 27 November 2019 (UTC)Reply


Hello again. Thought I review this one to reduce your unreviewed backlog and it's relatively shorter than your 24 Hours races lol! If you have any questions/comments, feel free to ping me here. As I can't review it all in one sitting, I'll work on this bit by bit and hopefully be done before one week.

Lead  Y

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Additional points

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Infobox  Y

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Background

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Sections 1 and 2  Y

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Section 3  Y

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  • "Entering the event, the first of the 2003 season...won by nine different competitors" - super long sentence even with the semicolon. I suggest breaking it up into multiple sentences for grammar/flow.
  • "the first of the 2003 season to be held without restrictor plates being mandated by NASCAR" - yes and no. Yes, Daytona was restricted, and Subway was unrestricted. However, Sun-Sentinel doesn't specifically say Subway was the first unrestricted race of the season. Even though Subway is race two, this source doesn't spell it out.
  • "won more than once at North Carolina Speedway in the Winston Cup Series in the previous ten years;" - not exactly true. While Gordon and Wallace are multiple time winners for Subway, Earnhart and Jarrett have won both Subway and Popcorn. I think this should only focus on Subway, and not Popcorn. The ESPN source combines the two races unfortunately. Y
  • "the past nine races at the track had been won by nine different competitors" - true. But this is also including the Popcorn races, making this out of scope. Y
  • "Qualifying was considered important at North Carolina Speedway" - "important" is an exact word used by Fayetteville and not neutral. Y
  • "79% of the winners in the 75 races held at the track" - yes, but this is also including Popcorn. As this is a Subway race, and there's no reference to Popcorn, this is out of scope. Y
    • "and rarely by the one who led the most laps" - true, but this is only relevant for 15 out of 75 races that were under 400 miles, not all 75 races. Therefore, these two facts aren't connected. Also not relevant to Subway as it's subway+popcorn. Y
  • What do you mean by tire abasement? Y
    • "because a large coating of sand was blown onto the asphalt surface from localized gusts" - yes/no. Winds have blown sand onto the track in the past. But, as the ESPN source is two days before the event, it's not confirmed that it happened again like previous events. Y
    • "and this often changed the event's complexion" - again, this is crystal because the source is two days before the event. The sand does effect the race, but ESPN doesn't say it did effect the track in 2003. Y

Additional points  Y

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Classification

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Qualifying  Y

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Race  Y

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Additional points  Y

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Standings after the race  Y

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Section break

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For these sections: the infobox, sections 1-2 of background, and standings after the race are done. There are a few remaining points leftover from section 3 of background, and a couple of points left in the classification part (one each from qualifying / race). --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 21:06, 28 November 2019 (UTC)Reply

Practice and qualifying

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Paragraph 1  Y

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Additional points
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Paragraph 2  Y

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Additional points
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Paragraph 3  Y

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additional points
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Race

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p1  Y

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p2  Y

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p3  Y

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p4  Y

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P5  Y

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p6  Y

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Post-race

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P1  Y
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  • "Jarrett appeared in Victory Lane to celebrate his 31st career win in front of the crowd of 40,000 people" - race reference does not have Victory Lane nor Jarrett having his 31st win. Y
  • "He credited his teammate Sadler for providing him with a suspension setup that enabled him to win." - kinda right. USA Today does say Sadler worked on the suspension, while Birinigham news said Jarrett credited Sadler for his "notes". But neither source mentions both halves of the sentence making this WP:SYNTHESIS.  Note: see below
  • "Sadler and Jarrett's crew chief Brad Parrott" - oddly, both Roanoke and Birmingham News reference Parrott as Jarrett's crew chief only, and not also Sadler.  Note: see below
  • Jarrett also dedicated the victory to the "older generation", - i think it should be a colon instead of a comma, but per the next point:
    • Those [young] guys are really talented...I can hang with them." - Roanoke doesn't have that quote. There is some in the USA Today source but not all of it. Google doesn't help me either with the 46 years old part.
  • "Busch spoke of his disappointment of finishing second at North Carolina Speedway for the second straight year" - not in Roanoke.
  • "Third-placed Kenseth said he was proud of his team" - I don't really see this part unless you're referring to "we had a good day" part. Kenseth talks a lot more about his car than his team lol! Y
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P2  Y
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  • Wallace's and Earnhardt's quotes seems extensive to me. I suggest either trimming them down and/or paraphrasing them. Out of the two, I'm more concerned about Earnhardt's quote.
  • "Rusty Wallace, who led the most laps of any other driver (182) until he fell to sixth" - redundant as it's already in the last paragraph of the race section. Also not mentioned it was the "most" laps led. Y
  • "Earnhardt finished three laps behind Jarrett in 33rd place." - seems out of place to me as there's more emphasis on his quote than placing. Y
  • "He acknowledged the contact with Jeff Gordon's" -> He acknowledged Jeff Gordon's contact with him (or something like that) as Gordon smacked into him, not the other way around. Y
  • "McMurray said he believed his fifth-place result increased his confidence," - I don't think his win boosted his confidence. While he said it made him "feel good", the confidence was about the journalists/meeting a new crew chief. Y
additional points
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  • "a damn bullet" when he was leading and praised it," - praised doesn't seem right to signal the transition from "damn bullet" to "track getting black". I'd suggest a different wording to introduce the 3/4s quoted part as it's different from the other part. Y
P3  Y
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Pictures  Y

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Captions  Y

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Extra stuff I've spotted

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Overall

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I'll be checking the race sections later as I'm taking a break from reviewing the left.

Apart from race paragraphs. here's what's leftover:

  • Points in the lead section (i just reviewed it) Y
  • Qualifying  Y: Weather wording in p1, Fastest lap times, provisionals and race setups in p2, Nadeau hitting the wall and Burton piroutetting in p3.
  • Post race  Y: bit of work in p1, transistion word in Wallace's p2 quote,
  • Caption wording for Wallace. Y
  • Stuff in the extra stuff i spotted section. --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 16:59, 4 December 2019 (UTC)Reply

@MWright96: Based on the small amount of leftover points in most of these sections (excluding race sections) plus your diligence of going through the sections while I was reviewing the article, I'm willing to place this article on hold for a week than reassess from there. If any more points are needed to be address in the race section, I'll ping you again with an update. --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 18:46, 4 December 2019 (UTC)Reply

@MWright96: Okay, there is a bit of work leftover is the race section paragraphs excluding P3. Most have a few issues, with the big one being various issues in P4. After these issues from P1-P6 have been addressed, I'll run a grammar check again as there've been a lot of edits to this article. --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 03:52, 8 December 2019 (UTC)Reply
@MWright96: As this is coming up to the last day of the initial hold, there's just one bit left in p4: new source indicating Busch held the lead in 253. As for the other two removals in p4, i understand your reasoning. --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 01:02, 11 December 2019 (UTC)Reply
@MWright96: Alrighty. For the last point, Racing Reference doesn't mention any pitstops with Busch 253 lap restart. If you drop this part only, you'll be all set to go. --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 20:22, 11 December 2019 (UTC)Reply
@MrLinkinPark333: Dropped mention of pit stops. MWright96 (talk) 20:27, 11 December 2019 (UTC)Reply
@MWright96: Perfect. There's a bit of punctuation cleanup I'll have to address, but that doesn't fall under GA so I'll pass this article. Congrats! --MrLinkinPark333 (talk) 20:47, 11 December 2019 (UTC)Reply