Talk:Aaron Eckhart
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GA Review
edit- This review is transcluded from Talk:Aaron Eckhart/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
The article's in really good (or almost good?) shape at the moment, and there are only a few things I can suggest to improve the article.
- Specify that "offensive coordinator" refers to American football - without looking at the film's article one could assume he worked on a lacrosse team!
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Do not use the term "most recently" per WP:MOSBIO#Out-of-date material - these terms go out of date quickly, and I have no doubt that Eckhart's working on something new most of the time.
- Has been removed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- What does "Mary M. (Lawrence) Eckhart" mean? If Lawrence is her maiden name, should it say "née Lawrence"?
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:16, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Jump right into abbreviating BYU at the beginning of the Career section; it's just been established above.
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:01, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Again, in Career, specify that "offensive coordinator" refers to NFL.
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- "Reoccurring" -> "recurring"
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:01, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- I noticed the phrase "that same year" is used a lot - is there another phrase you could use to replace some instances?
- I think I got it. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:16, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Roger Ebert "writes" or "wrote"?
- Fixed. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:01, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- In the Filmography notes, it should be "Satellite Award", "Golden Globe Award" and "Independent Spirit Award".
- Done. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Tumble currently links to a dab page; it doesn't look like an article exists for the film.
- Done. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- For Conversations With Other Women, I suggest naming the role "Man" as like Tumble. The role is listed just as Man on IMDb.
- Done. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 01:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
That's about it. You've got seven days to make necessary changes - just drop me a note when you think you're done and hopefully we'll promote the article to GA :) —97198 talk 09:00, 30 July 2008 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking care of business - I'm going to go ahead and promote. —97198 talk 07:08, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you so much for the review. ;) -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 14:22, 31 July 2008 (UTC)
Copy-editing notes
editI went through the article and made some (mostly minor) fixes to the prose. Here are some comments/suggestions I had along the way:
- Per WP:LEAD, the lead section needs to summarize the article in full. Something needs to be said about Eckhart's early/family/personal life. Where he's from, where he went to school, relationships, etc. A couple succinct sentences should do it.
- Added some stuff, hope that helps.
- Eckhart wound up being cast in Sean Penn's The Pledge (2001): this reads as somewhat random in the lead, because no notability is asserted for this film -- or most of any films mentioned in the first paragraph, for that matter. I would say lesser recognized/notable films could stand to be cut in order to make room for some personal details, as suggested above. The lead shouldn't be an exhaustive account of his career. The body of the article does that just fine. :)
- I've removed somewhat not notable films.
- He had supporting roles in television appearances. Same thing: were any of them notable? Any examples? What time period is this?
- Not notable roles, but, when reading of his bio., that info. came up with him having "guests roles" on television. I ended it up removing it, not important.
- Is it known why his family moved around so much when he was young? Just curious.
- Added some info. on it.
- Can it be said how long Oleanna ran from? It may help to include it, as the chronology becomes a little fuzzy around 2003-2004.
- It ran in early 2004.
I think a couple more copy-edits will help, as there were times that I was unsure of the wording of several sentences. If I unintentionally changed the meaning of something, please do correct me! I attempted to vary wording/sentence structure where I could, but repetition may still be a problem. Other than possible lingering prose issues, the article is fairly good. The referencing especially seems topnotch. If you have any particular questions, or want further advice on the prose, just let me know. María (habla conmigo) 14:33, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you for the copy-edits, and no you didn't mess up anything, everything seems to be fine. Thank you for the sources comment, really tried to look for reliable sources to include in the article. Hope I got your comments you left. If not, I'll continue with adding/fixing. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 17:29, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
- No problem, I'm glad it helped. I did a bit more cleaning-up of the lead with your new additions, but it's already improved a lot. The lead is much smoother in comparison. Best of luck, and let me know if/when this reaches FAC. María (habla conmigo) 17:45, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you for helping out with the stuff I added and thank you for your most appreciated comments. Absolutely, will let you know what the outcome of the article becomes. :) -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 18:37, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
- No problem, I'm glad it helped. I did a bit more cleaning-up of the lead with your new additions, but it's already improved a lot. The lead is much smoother in comparison. Best of luck, and let me know if/when this reaches FAC. María (habla conmigo) 17:45, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
Cobham Hall is not in Sydney.--Grahame (talk) 03:07, 27 September 2008 (UTC)
- Good catch. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 04:12, 27 September 2008 (UTC)
Redraft notes
edit(1) ThinkBlue, do me a favor and rewrite this sentence to mean what I expect you to mean—that is, that Aaron was born in California, and that Aaron moved to England at age 13 when his father relocated the family. The way your sentence reads currently is that Aaron's father was born in California. If this is the case, then everything sounds a bit weird....
Born in California, his father relocated the family to England when Aaron was 13.
— existing sentence
Anne Teedham (talk) 20:22, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
- I think I got the change of the sentence not sure; this is what I wrote ---> "Aaron was born in California and moved to England at age 13 when his father relocated the family." -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 20:49, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
- Good. That's the same thing that I wrote. *smile* Keep checking here from time to time for further notes. Anne Teedham (talk) 21:26, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
- Will do. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 21:40, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
- Good. That's the same thing that I wrote. *smile* Keep checking here from time to time for further notes. Anne Teedham (talk) 21:26, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
(2) ThinkBlue, go HERE and see #3. Sorry. Anne Teedham (talk) 13:40, 1 October 2008 (UTC)
(3) ThinkBlue, Finished. Sorry it took so long. Go HERE. Anne Teedham (talk) 13:52, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
the following material has been moved here from a redraft Aaron Eckhart talkpage which is no longer available
The Aaron Eckhart copyediting project has been completed. The enclosed material details all relevant discussion from beginning to end. -- Anne Teedham (talk) 14:12, 25 October 2008 (UTC) |
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The following has been placed in a collapsed state for simplified usability. |
(1) Hi Anne Teedham, I don't know if this a general or mainstream article, but I was maybe hoping that you may scrutinize the "writing" in Aaron Eckhart's article? The reason I ask, is since, I'm trying to aim the article to Feature article status and I got an oppose saying that the article needs to be "scrutinized" by someone who's new to the article. I was hoping if you could help out with that. If you can't, no hard feelings. But, if you can, I would appreciate it a whole lot. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 18:26, 29 September 2008 (UTC)
(2) Unfortunately I can not answer questions concerning the contents of your article until I have finished copy-editing. My primary concerns are sentence structure, cohesiveness, and continuity. These require my absolute concentration from the first sentence, into the supporting structure of its paragraph. They also require me to keep in mind what came before, thematically as in a musical composition. Sometimes when an author's writing begins to breakdown, my concentration becomes exhausted; often I need to begin again and again and again...similar to an old 45 rpm on repetitive play. I hope you understand. Hopefully I will be finished shortly. Please keep an eye on the article's talkpage. If I have a problem with grammar or structure, I will try to seek your input. After I finish, I will be happy to address every concern which you may have. Anne Teedham (talk) 12:26, 30 September 2008 (UTC)
(3) ThinkBlue, I am sad to say that something happened yesterday at approximately 13:54 (UTC) when you began editing your article. I was in the background working on copy-editing. Sometime during your various alterations, my entire manuscript of copy-edits was wiped clean. Unfortunately, this was my master copy and I do not believe that I will be able to recreate it without work. I spent a great number of hours working to get to that point and I am frustrated now. I doubt that I will take the time to continue. I am sorry that this happened; it is a lesson which I have learned now sadly for myself. If I had realized completely the conflict between your editing and my PREVIEW edits (which were going on in the background), then I would have taken the necessary precautions. As it was, I apparently SAVED to my master copy one of your EDITS without realizing the difference (since I was working far below what you were doing above). Regardless, as I have said, I am frustrated now and so I am going to abandon your project. I wish you well. I will, however, from time to time observe your on-going manuscript and offer whatever input I can. Sorry. (In a few days, I will move our correspondece to the Aaron Eckhart talkpage. Anne Teedham (talk) 13:32, 1 October 2008 (UTC)
(4) Good. I am glad the first section is satisfactory. Although it may need to be reworked again and again, I will concentrate on reconstructing the second section. I will use a different approach this time so your editing will not affect my work. Feel free to do whatever you wish to do and ignore me completely. I will post the second section in another collapsed box as soon as possible. A 12:00 (UTC), 2 October 2008
(5) ThinkBlue, look over my rough draft of Early Life and let me know if you want me to continue. Begin reading though from the opening lead. You will see where I have made a few minor adjustments for grammar, and inserted a few additional phrases. There is a conflict between the article's lead and the information in Early Life but I will explain that later; it is minor. Do not bother to copy this collapsed "rough draft", nor try to insert it. Merely continue with what you are doing; yet let me know if I should continue with what I am doing. p.s. (just to note): I believe that it is generally preferable in an encyclopedic article to use the full spelling "thirteen" rather than 13, 17, etc. Thank you. Anne Teedham (talk) 16:37, 2 October 2008 (UTC)
(6) Think Blue, here is a continuation of rough draft material. I apologize for the length of delay. I have been very busy with other work. I hope you find everything satisfactory. A
(7) ThinkBlue, sorry I took so long finishing your article: I got preoccupied with other things. Go HERE for more on the subject. Annie
(8)Redraft moved ==> Hi! I've moved your draft to User:Anne Teedham/Aaron Eckhart redraft. Drafts should be in user space, not in article space. Best, Sandstein 04:47, 24 October 2008 (UTC)
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The above is an extended post that has been collapsed for improved usability. |
Notes
ThinkBlue, two things come to mind immediately: the use of the expression "makes out" is inappropriate for an encyclopedia. Thus I altered it to "snuggles" and placed everything in a parenthetical expression. However, I wonder: Is this really necessary? Secondly, the fact that Eckhart may have photographed unsuspecting people may not be appreciated by some of those people. Thus, it could come back to haunt Eckhart in a rather, distasteful manner. I wonder: Is it necessary? (I removed the word "them" because of this.)
Throughout this rough draft you will note many additional phrases which may not be correct. I stuck them in merely in order to keep the rhythmic flow of your writing style going forward. If you change something, try not to provide lenghty replacements for simple construction. Obviously thirteen words replacing three would change things drastically.
I created the Redraft so you could read it...slooooowly....and examine it for specific detail, mistakes, and unwanted material, and then correct whatever you wanted. If you draw other editors into the Redraft, they could alter everything; thus making this exercise pointless. Eventually though, when you (and I) have exchanged ideas back and forth then it may be a good idea to draw others into the Redraft.
The original article can continue to exist without drawing anyone's attention to this Redraft. When you are satisfied with the Redraft's conclusion, then we can move it into a replacement position over the existing article. The advantage to all this is that there is a record of editorial give-and-take created by the various Wikipedia archivving procedures. See Talk:Rudolf Wanderone for an excellent example. I like all that detail which is provided in the various Wikipedia templates. Anne Teedham (talk) 15:41, 17 October 2008 (UTC)
minor details
(1) As an undergraduate at Brigham Young, Eckhart met director/writer Neil LaBute who cast Eckhart in several of LaBute's original plays. (see: first sentence, second paragraph, lead)
Later, Eckhart met director/writer Neil LaBute who cast him in several of LaBute's original plays, thus marking Eckhart's on-stage, theatrical debut. (see: second sentence, Early work)
These two sentences are more or less redundant: they say the samething e.g."...who cast Eckhart in several of LaBute's original plays". Thus, it might be nice in the second instance to say specifically the names of those plays e.g. "who cast him in xxxxx, and yyyyy, two of LaBute's original plays—thus marking Eckhart's on-stage, theatrical debut."
(2) I think the double-noun construction of "guest roles" would be "guest-roles" since "guest" is really a noun (however I am not certain).
(3) I removed the "with a buddy" from the hatched-a-plan sentence because the phrase is really just extra-wordy, unnecessary fluff that serves little purpose in furthering the overall impact of the complete sentence. Anne Teedham (talk) 22:25, 18 October 2008 (UTC)
(4) The second sentence of the lead is incorrect information and needs to be rewritten. From what I was able to google, it appears to me that Eckhart moved from California to England and attended the American Community School, an international school, in Cobham, Surrey. (Cobham Hall [located in Kent is a girls boarding school], and Cobham Hall [in Sydney, Australia] seems to be an old hotel). After performing (or beginning his acting career) in Charlie Brown in the UK (presumably at the American Community School), he then left England and completed his senior, high school year at some school in Sydney, Australia, where he "further developed his acting career" by peforming in Waiting for Godot. All of this needs to be clarified. Because Eckhart attended the American Community School in Cobham, Surrey, he may have attended the American International School in Sydney, Australia. I suppose an email to the AIS Principal could help to explain this confusion. Anne Teedham (talk) 14:25, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
- While I keep waiting for you to find this page, I asked a friend to take a quick look. He made a few punctuation changes, and then suggested that I try reworking the lead with the new information which I had acquired. So I tried and discovered something: Does Brigham Young have a Fine Arts degree specifically related to film? If so, then I suppose it is grammatically okay to say: "graduated from Brigham Young University with a Fine Arts degree in film." If not, then in film should be dropped probably. (i.e. I don't believe that it is necessary...really.) Anne Teedham (talk) 17:39, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
(5) In subsection 2000-2006, there is a problem in chronology. The second paragraph begins: "By 2003, Eckhart co-starred with Hilary Swank in The Core..."; the third paragraph says: "The following year, Eckhart performed a recurring role on NBC's television hit-series Frasier..." (meaning 2004); but the final sentence of paragraph three states, "At the close of 2003, Eckhart starred on the London stage, opposite Julia Stiles, in David Mamet's Oleanna...." This is a problem which I created, trying to maintain an A to Z chronology, while following along with your biographical details in the overall structure. The phrases need to be corrected. It may be just as simple as restating "The following year..." into something other such as "In July of that year" or ...perhaps correcting the "At the close of 2003." I really do not know any of the specifics. You do. Anne Teedham (talk) 16:23, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
(6) These two sentences: "The film was panned with mixed reviews and was unfavorably compared to the original film. Amy Biancolli of the Houston Chronicle however in her review wrote: "Eckhart excels at these spongier roles." probably should be rewritten to a single sentence: "The film was panned with mixed reviews and was unfavorably compared to the original film; however, Amy Biancolli of the Houston Chronicle in her review wrote: "Eckhart excels at these spongier roles." but, I think, it all depends upon whether or not a reader stumbles on the construction of "...however in her review wrote:" Anne Teedham (talk) 16:36, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
(7) The couple has...the couple have. That's a really tough one for me. It sounds terrible as has so I changed it to have, and will try to research the grammatical scholars for the correct use. (If they say has, then I would recommend changing the word couple to they because I can not tolerate the expression the couple has.) Anne Teedham (talk) 18:15, 19 October 2008 (UTC)
Spoilers
editThe article states that Eckhart portrays Harvey Dent and his villainous alter-ego Two-Face. Isn't that a spoiler considering the fact that many people who may be planning to watch The Dark Knight haven't read the comics or watched any other films or cartoons? I do believe his transformation into Two-Face was supposed to be a surprize to those who were not familiar with the characters. Abc85 (talk) 09:17, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
- Nope, according to this, spoilers are allowed. In interviews, Eckhart does say he plays both Harvey Dent and Two-Face. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 23:23, 5 October 2008 (UTC)
German Ancestry
editSo, is he of German ancestry? Eckhart... is there a more German sounding surname? Guess not. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 88.153.197.123 (talk) 19:19, 8 November 2008 (UTC)
- A source is needed for his supposed German background. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 19:52, 9 November 2008 (UTC)
Filmography duplication
editThe career section lists most movies, often without extra information. That's pretty pointless as it also is in the Filmography. I'll remove every mention in the career section that doesn't actually add any information compared to the filmography. --OpenFuture (talk) 18:51, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
- There is no problem with listing the films, without extra information, in the career section. Many actor articles have them, so I don't see why this one is an exception. If you have a problem with this, bring it up at WP:ACTOR instead of just removing information from the article. -- ThinkBlue (Hit BLUE) 19:19, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
- I don't see anything at WP:ACTOR that says that normal Wikipedia styles should be broken in this case. Reasonably the career section should be the highligts, not every single movie. That's what filmography is for. --OpenFuture (talk) 20:56, 14 May 2010 (UTC)
Not from Cupertino.
editI grew up with the Eckharts. He lived in San Jose (West) until they moved to Saratoga. I am not sure of where he was born but Cupertino does not have a hospital.
Education
editEckhart did not leave "high school without graduating". Americans graduate from High School- or rather College. Australians leave high school, and graduate from a university. The language should be changed to reflect the Australian terminology, not American.Royalcourtier (talk) 01:41, 5 October 2013 (UTC)
Starred in Midway, a blockbuster?
editWhile Eckhart did have a role in Midway it was a fairly small one. Further, Midway was a box-office bomb, not exactly a blockbuster. 73.117.187.249 (talk) 15:23, 27 April 2023 (UTC)
Early life and bio in lead
editIs it OK to write biography in lead? Where he studied, etc. I haven't seen something like this before, but it is a good article. Kirill C1 (talk) 11:38, 5 August 2023 (UTC)