Talk:Addiction to power in The Lord of the Rings/GA1

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Reviewer: Artem.G (talk · contribs) 07:28, 6 January 2022 (UTC)Reply


Hi, will take this one! It can take me several days to review. Artem.G (talk) 07:28, 6 January 2022 (UTC)Reply

Many thanks as always. Chiswick Chap (talk) 15:21, 6 January 2022 (UTC)Reply

Comments:

  • "progressively corrupts the mind of its owner to use the Ring for evil." - shouldn't a plural be used here? There were multiple owners, so maybe "the minds of its owners"?
    • I guess the point is, there can never be more than one at once, and that person is invariably progressively corrupted.
      • agree, you're probably right
  • "1887 statement that "power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely".[1]" - I think that the ref can be removed from here, you have the same quote with ref in the body
    • All right, but there are plenty of "{{cn}}" inserters out there.
      • if you think this would happen, let the ref stay.
  • "Sauron was already corrupted when he chose to put much" - maybe not "corrupted", but "addicted"?
    • No, he was already corrupted before he created the addictive Ring.
  • "In J. R. R. Tolkien's fantasy work The Lord of the Rings" - maybe something like "in Tolkien's fantasy world of Middle-earth, the One Ring..."? The Ring was present in The Hobbit too.
    • I think we might leave this one, the ring (small 'r') in The Hobbit has no such dark origins, and Tolkien had to chase about quite a bit to modify the children's book to make it even roughly compatible with the later story of the One Ring.
      • ok, fair point.
  • I don't have any strong objections here, but for those readers who are not very familiar with LotR, "during the Second Age" and "own power as a Maia" would be cryptic. Though both are links, so it's probably fine.
    • Glossed both.
  • " as Elrond, Galadriel, Aragorn and Faramir " - link Aragorn here. and maybe a serial comma will be suitable.
    • Done.
  • "however, as can be seen in the changes it works in Frodo, Bilbo and Gollum." - what can be seen in the changes? not sure I understand this sentence clearly.
    • Edited.
  • "murderously obsessed" - do we really need 'murderously' here?
    • Removed.
  • Tolkien vs Plato: Further information: One Ring - should it be Ring of Gyges here? if not, I think that a link to One Ring is not needed here, as it was discussed above.
    • Fixed.
  • "Shippey quotes Lord Acton's 1887 statement:" - for readers who are not from England, some introduction of Lord Acton is needed.
    • Glossed.

More to come. Artem.G (talk) 17:00, 8 January 2022 (UTC)Reply

Few more:

  • ""man deþ swa he byþ þonne he mot swa he wile": "A man does as he is when he can do what he wants"" - is it from any book, or is it a proverb or something similar?
    • Yes, it's a proverb.
  • "They sound oppressive, like Nazi slogans " - maybe Nazi propaganda or something similar could be linked here?
    • Done.

That's all from me. Very nice and really interesting article, thanks for that! Sources are fine, no copyvio, both images are tagged. Artem.G (talk) 11:11, 9 January 2022 (UTC)Reply

Many thanks for the review. Chiswick Chap (talk) 12:06, 9 January 2022 (UTC)Reply
Passing now, really nice article! Artem.G (talk) 12:19, 9 January 2022 (UTC)Reply