Talk:Anthony Moon/GA1

Latest comment: 12 years ago by Wizardman in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman (talk · contribs) 01:00, 7 April 2012 (UTC)Reply

I have no idea why this is still waiting for a review. Don't have much time to but I'll get a review up as soon as I can. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 01:00, 7 April 2012 (UTC)Reply

Here are the issues I found:

  • "which is later a focus to one of the storylines" a focus of one
  • "Anthony first appears when he poses as a member of the council" what council? Those that watch Eastenders I'm sure would know that but a lay reader has no clue.  Done
  • "Eddie sells them on for £8000" sells them on what?  Done
  • "They make up the following day and Jodie leaves and Poppy leaves " can this be re-worded? Reads odd gramatically.  Done
  • "which leads Donnie attempting" which leads to  Done
  • "Phil Mitchell (Steve McFadden) say it makes a change" says it  Done
  • "Anthony first appears on 25 July 2011." appeared  Done
  • "Lapinskas appeared as Anthony in EastEnders E20, before" no comma needed here  Done
  • I'd actually call "Introduction, casting and characterisation" the main section, since there's only one section in creation, so that title can just be cut and moved.  Done
  • The above section feels quote heavy to me. See if you can convert at least a bit of it to your own words. For that matter the entire article seems to veer a little bit towards that.  Done
  • The blockquote in the Eddie and Michael section needs a cite. I assume it's the one right before but let's be safe on that.  Done
  • "Lapinskas deemed his character "pleased that somebody likes him", " cite needed  Done

There are quite a few fixes to make, but they're not too tough. I'll put the article on hold for five days so the issues can be fixed. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 03:26, 7 April 2012 (UTC)Reply

Looks good now, so I'll pass the article. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 04:43, 8 April 2012 (UTC)Reply