Talk:Armenian parliament shooting/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by WritingEnthusiast14 in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit
GA toolbox
Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: WritingEnthusiast14 (talk · contribs) 17:41, 12 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Here are my comments:

Is the article well-written? - There's a few problems. For instance, take a look at the introduction.

"The Armenian parliament shooting, commonly known in Armenia as October 27 (Հոկտեմբերի 27, Hoktemberi k'sanyot' ), was a terrorist[5][6] attack on the Armenian National Assembly in the capital Yerevan on October 27, 1999 by a group of five armed men led by Nairi Hunanyan that, among others, killed the two de facto decision-makers in the country's political leadership—Prime Minister Vazgen Sargsyan, Parliament Speaker Karen Demirchyan."

Between "Prime Minister Vazgen Sargsyan" and "Parliament Speaker Karen Demirchyan" there is no "and", and there should be one.

There's also an issue in the "Claims by Ashot Manucharyan" section.

Ashot Manucharyan, one of the leading members of the Karabakh Committee, the former Minister of Internal Affairs and Levon Ter-Petrosyan's National Security Adviser and his close ally until 1993, stated in October 2000 that Armenian officials were warned by a foreign country about the shootings. He also declared that "Western special services" were involved in the October 27 events. In Manucharyan's words, "the special services of the US and France are acting to destroy Armenia, and in this context, they are much likely to be involved in the realization of the terrorist acts in Armenia."[51]

both killed by the terrorists on October 27, 1999, became the victims of the plan of territorial swap between Armenia and Azerbaijan. Manucharian accused the President Kocharian of concealing from the investigation the main version of the realization of the terrorist act of October 27 - V. Sarkisian's and K. Demirchian's disagreement with the so-called "Goble plan" of territorial swap between Armenia and Azerbaijan." [52]

The second paragraph just starts as "both killed by terrorists...". This sentence appears to be broken, because it doesn't specify who "both" is and it also doesn't start with a capital letter, as it should.

Is the article verifiable? Mostly. There is a line in the introduction that doesn't have a citation ("Sargsyan and Demirchyan were posthumously honored with National Hero titles").

Is the article broad? - Yes.

Is the article neutral? - Yes.

Is the article stable? - Yes.

Is the article illustrated with proper license information? - Yes.

Final conclusion - Due to the issues I raised above concerning grammar and formatting, I'm going to put this article on hold. I would recommend another round of copyediting and finding a source for the unreferenced statement that was mentioned above. If you do that, it will probably pass the next time around. Thanks, --Writing Enthusiast (talk | contribs) 21:37, 12 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

Thanks for the review. I've address some of the issues you have raised. There are a few (mostly cosmetic) changes I would like to make before you review again. --Երևանցի talk 18:41, 13 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

@WritingEnthusiast14: All done. --Երևանցի talk 01:31, 17 October 2014 (UTC)Reply

@Yerevantsi: I've finished the review (and made a few minor corrections myself). Of course, it's not a perfect article (no article is), but I feel that it sufficiently meets the GA criteria. Therefore, I'll  Pass this article. Thanks for your work on it. :) --Writing Enthusiast (talk | contribs) 00:55, 18 October 2014 (UTC)Reply