Talk:Austin, Nichols and Company Warehouse/GA1
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GA Review
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Reviewer: Vami IV (talk · contribs) 17:04, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Opening statement
editIn reviews I conduct, I may make small copyedits. These will only be limited to spelling and punctuation (removal of double spaces and such). I will only make substantive edits that change the flow and structure of the prose if I previously suggested and it is necessary. For replying to Reviewer comment, please use 
Done, 
Fixed, 
Added, 
Not done, 
Doing..., or 
Removed, followed by any comment you'd like to make. I will be crossing out my comments as they are redressed, and only mine. A detailed, section-by-section review will follow. —♠Vami_IV†♠ 17:04, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- @Vami IV: Thanks for the review. I have addressed all your comments above. epicgenius (talk) 18:18, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Prose
edit
Red Hook's Atlantic Basin, Brooklyn Navy Yard,
the Brooklyn Navy Yard
Done
nearby waterfront, rail terminal, and nearby streets.
one too many nearbys- Done
the Real Estate Record stated
What form of publication is this?- Done It was a magazine.
Some of the site's preexisting structures had been razed by mid-1913.
Ooh. What's the story behind this?- It was part of the warehouse's construction. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
construction process,[11] By September
wrong punctuation mark
Fixed
The first operations at the Austin, Nichols & Company warehouse started in January 1915,[16] and the company had completed its relocation to its new headquarters by March.[11][17]
Where was Austin, Nichols & Company hanging out after their lease ran out in 1914?- As I recall, the lease ran out at the end of 1914 and the company moved to their warehouse in the beginning of 1915, so they basically spent this time relocating. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
with annual sales income of $40 million by 1920.
an annual- Done
as such revocations had occurred only four times in 14 years.
In the last 14 years?- Yes, Fixed. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
- Yes,
the conversion of 184 Kent Avenue to 338 rental apartments
into 338 rental apartments- Done
subsequently leased space in the building the next year
Remove "subsequently"; it is vague and makes the specific "next year" redundant- Done
The design reflects Late 19th and Early 20th Century American Movements architecture.[1]
Rewrite.
Removed That is a generic placeholder and shouldn't really be used anyway. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
Its primary construction material is reinforced concrete, which Gilbert used in order to increase the building's maximum load weight, and make the structure fireproof.
Combine with the first sentence, break into additional sentences as need requires.- Well, since the first sentence is now removed, I have split this into two sentences. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
The facade is divided into numerous architectural bays, which generally contain groupings of three narrow windows on each floor. These windows are recessed slightly within the facade.
Condense.- Done
One thousand five hundred workers
Why not just use a numeral?- The sentence begins with a numeral, which isn't grammatically correct. I have found another way to reword this. epicgenius (talk) 18:17, 5 April 2020 (UTC)
GA progress
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