Talk:Azarmidokht/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Iazyges (talk · contribs) 17:29, 30 July 2019 (UTC)

Criteria

GA Criteria
GA Criteria: 1 1.a Y 1.b Y 2 2.a Y 2.b Y 2.c Y 2.d Y (falsely high 22.5% to one site due to shared quotes.) 3 3.a Y 3.b Y 4 4.a Y 5 5.a Y 6 6.a Y 6.b Y

• No DAB links Y
• No dead links Y (Although I'd suggest using Wayback Machine to archive them.)
• No missing citations Y

Discussion

• @HistoryofIran: That is all my suggestions, passing now. Iazyges Consermonor Opus meum 18:58, 31 July 2019 (UTC)

Prose Suggestions

Please note that all of these are suggestions, and can be implemented or ignored at your discretion.

Lede

• Suggest expanding lede where possible, perhaps with information about her personality.
• She was the daughter of king (shah) Khosrow II (r. 590–628). She was the second Sasanian queen; her sister Boran ruled before and after Azarmidokht. Azarmidokht ruled Iran after her cousin Shapur-i Shahrvaraz was deposed. suggest She was the daughter of Shah Khosrow II (r. 590–628). She was the second Sasanian queen; her sister Boran ruled before and after her. Azarmidokht came to power in Iran after her cousin Shapur-i Shahrvaraz was deposed by the Parsig faction, led by Piruz Khosrow, who helped Azarmidokht ascend the throne

Name

• Azarmidokht is the New Persian variant of her original name in Middle Persian, Āzarmīgdukht, meaning "daughter of the respected one", referring to her father Khosrow II (r. 590–628).[1] as far as I can tell, she was actually named Āzarmīgdukht, but is referred to as Azarmidokht. If so, I'd suggest Azarmidokht is the New Persian variant of her name used by scholars; her original name was Middle Persian, Āzarmīgdukht, meaning "daughter of the respected one", referring to her father Khosrow II (r. 590–628).

Background

• This dealt a heavy blow to the empire, which it would never recover from. Could do to explain this a bit more. Does this mean the loss of Khosrow II's leadership, or the reputation of the empire? If leadership I'd suggest The loss of Khosrow's leadership was a heavy blow to the empire, which it would never recover from. If reputation, I'd suggest mentioning why it hurt their reputation.
• Azarmidokht and her sister Boran reportedly criticized and scolded Kavad II for his barbaric actions, which made him filled with remorse. is the "made him filled with remorse" a quote of something? It seems like it could be. If so, put it in "quotes", if not, I'd suggest which caused him to become remorseful.

Reign

• he left for Ctesiphon, "defeating every army of Azarmidokht that he met". suggest He led troops to Ctesiphon, the capital of the Sasanian Empire, "defeating every army of Azarmidokht that he met".

Personality

• Her title was "the Just." suggest She is referred to by [source] as "the Just".

Sources

There are several books in the sources list which are not actually utilized, (Schmitt2005a, Schmitt2005b, Daryaee2014, Daryaee2009, Chaumont1989, Sundermann1988, Brosius), suggest either moving them to further reading or incorporating them with inline citations.

Hey @Iazyges:, thanks for reviewing this article. I did as you requested, but how do I use Wayback Machine? --HistoryofIran (talk) 15:46, 31 July 2019 (UTC)

@HistoryofIran: I'm not quite finished with the prose suggestions quite yet; go to the site, insert the URL you wish to archive into the box under "Save Page Now". It will archive the page as it is. It will create (or update if someone has already saved it) an archived page; take the archived url and insert it into the citation with the "|archive_url=" parameter, and add today as the "|archive-date=" parameter. Iazyges Consermonor Opus meum 18:44, 31 July 2019 (UTC)

The source that calls her "the Just" is unusually not listed as far as I can tell. Also, about the "dealt a heavy blow to the empire" i'm referring to the weakening of the empire. --HistoryofIran (talk) 03:44, 1 August 2019 (UTC)