Talk:BAP Unión/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk · contribs) 13:08, 4 July 2017 (UTC)

Will take this one. Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 13:08, 4 July 2017 (UTC)

• Lead and infobox;
  • Lead must be the summary of the inforbox; Most of the information presented in the lead is not mentioned in the body of the article. Per WP:LEAD, please move respective information to the body and summarize the body in the lead. Per WP:LEADCITE, you need not provide citations in the lead.
  • most important hero of the Peruvian Navy; this sentence doesn't comply with neutral point of view
• Section 1;
  • due to the economic crisis Peru suffered at the end; suffered what? lack of resources, for procurement or manpower etc.
  • It was not until "Eventually, in" 2010, that the project was finally approved and "the" construction "was" authorized
  • On In 2012,
  • CYPSA; never mentioned before, please mention the full form on first mention
  • and launched -> and the ship was launched
  • help of an instructor of "from" the Spanish Navy
  • held on its deck and attended by Peruvian president Ollanta Humala -> held on its deck witnessed by the President Ollanta Humala
  • Peruvian president Ollanta Humala, the Minister of Defense and the General Commander of the Navy; mention who are the person here on the first mention
  • This act meant the ship was placed in active service; please remove this sentence, it is a redundant
  • As the first commander of the ship was designated Captain Gianfranco Polar Figari, who performed in June 2016 the sea trial of the vessel -> Captain Gianfranco Polar Figari was named to be the first captain of the ship, who conducted the sea trials of the vessel in June 2016.
  • inister of Defense, Jakke Valakivi, Minister or Foreign Affairs, Ana María Sanchez and the Commander of the Navy, Admiral Edmundo Deville; please moves the names to first mention as instructed above
  • Inconsistent mention; Commander of the Navy & General Commander of the Navy
  • Minister or of Foreign Affairs
• Section 2;
  • Maintain consistency of decimal digits; 115.50 m, 6.50 m, 53.5 m
  • who appears with his right arm, His head is adorned with; ships are generally referred as females
• Section 3; all good
• Dead links check shows many dead links, please fix them.
• 7.4% confidence, violation unlikely.

Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 07:32, 16 July 2017 (UTC)

Improvements and corrections made

Hello Krishna Chaitanya Velaga. These are the corrections I´ve made:

Lead

• The lead has been improved by adding some information from the infobox and the body of the article. Also, some info from the lead has been moved to the body. Done.
• Although Miguel Grau is the most important hero of peruvian navy, I have changed the statement to “a hero of peruvian navy”. Done.

Section 1

• Due to the economic crisis of “debt and hyper-inflation”. I have added this, which is supported by the source. Done.
• It was not until "Eventually, in" 2010, that the project was finally approved and "the" construction "was" authorized. Done.
• On In 2012, (In). Done.
• CYPSA; never mentioned before, please mention the full form on first mention. Done.
• and launched -> and the ship was launched. Done.
• help of an instructor of "from" the Spanish Navy. Done.
• held on its deck and attended by Peruvian president Ollanta Humala -> held on its deck witnessed by the President Ollanta Humala. Done.
• Peruvian president Ollanta Humala, the Minister of Defense and the General Commander of the Navy; mention who are the person here on the first mention. Done.
• This act meant the ship was placed in active service; please remove this sentence, it is a redundant. Done.
• As the first commander of the ship was designated Captain Gianfranco Polar Figari, who performed in June 2016 the sea trial of the vessel -> Captain Gianfranco Polar Figari was named to be the first captain of the ship, who conducted the sea trials of the vessel in June 2016. Done.
• Minister of Defense, Jakke Valakivi, Minister or Foreign Affairs, Ana María Sanchez and the Commander of the Navy, Admiral Edmundo Deville; please moves the names to first mention as instructed above. Done.
• Inconsistent mention; Commander of the Navy & General Commander of the Navy. Done.
• Minister or of Foreign Affairs. Done.

Section 2:

• Maintain consistency of decimal digits; 115.50 m, 6.50 m, 53.5 m. Done.
• who appears with his right arm, His head is adorned with; ships are generally referred as females: In this case, the statement refers to a man (the inca Tupac Yupanqui) whose image was used (depicted) in the figurehead.

Section 3: It was ok

Broken links:

• I have repaired all links dead.

Regards, --Elelch (talk) 21:14, 17 July 2017 (UTC)

---

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

   Regards, Krishna Chaitanya Velaga (talk • mail) 14:05, 23 July 2017 (UTC)