Talk:Basketball (The Office)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Ruby2010 (talk · contribs) 05:29, 1 April 2012 (UTC)

Will review this one soon (remember it being an enjoyable episode). Ruby 2010/2013 05:29, 1 April 2012 (UTC)

• Article is stable, no deadlinks or DABS that need fixing
• Can probably cut "Michael eventually tells the office that they don't have to come in on Saturday either." out of the lead (too much detail)
• "where Michael takes about" Talks?
• The first paragraph of the plot section could do with some rewriting (not a fan of all the parenthesizes)
• Some tense issues in that section (Michael would food around -> Michael fools around) for instance. Bring it all to present tense
• No need to say Greg Daniels every time you mention him (Daniels is sufficient). Same for other actors (Krasinski especially)
• ____ later ____ - A lot of repetition in the production's first and third paragraphs
• "that the American version of The Office" Italicize The Office
• The inspiration was a deleted scene? (not a delete scene)
• "talks about a pick-up basketball game" What is a pick-up basketball game? I'm not sure if a word is missing, or if my confusion is stemming from my general ignorance of the sport
• Typo: "several of their others pilots"
• "Donald Lee Harris designed the warehouse set, a set Krasinski described" -> "Donald Lee Harris designed the warehouse set, which Krasinski described"
• Wikilink hockey
• The reviews section could definitely use some expanding; either flesh out what the reviewers said or find a few others
• Typos: "retained 92% or its lead-in audience." and "gave the episode and 7.5 out of 10"
• Use consistent date formatting for refs

Otherwise the article looks good. Very nice use of the audio commentaries. Will place the article on hold for seven days. Thanks, Ruby 2010/2013 19:26, 2 April 2012 (UTC)

Thank you for reviewing this, and thanks for the kind words. I believe I've addressed all the issues.--Gen. Quon (talk) 20:28, 2 April 2012 (UTC)

Your changes look great. Fantastic job improving the article from an ugly stub into its current state. I'm glad the series' older articles are getting some love; I'd like to improve more season three episodes when I have time. Pass for GA! Ruby 2010/2013 03:38, 3 April 2012 (UTC)