Talk:Bath School disaster/GA1

Latest comment: 11 years ago by Shearonink in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sven Manguard (talk · contribs) 04:38, 15 January 2013 (UTC)Reply

GAN Quicksheet 1.24 SM
(Criteria)


Starting comments: I know that I said that I was done with GAN reviews for this round, but this came out of a conversation with Shearonink on IRC, and I'm going to do it anyways.

1. Well written:

a. prose/copyright:   Question
  • Just curious, what do you think that the "nth grade" adds in the "Killed in the disaster" box entries? I'm slightly leaning towards saying that it's visual noise that should be removed (grade and age are closely related), but if you have a reason behind it, I'm open to them staying in.
  • Well, I suppose because it was a different time and the ages of these Michigan farm children would not necessarily indicate which grade they would be in if they were attending school in present times, also I think they are listed in the same order as some of the Bath memorials.Shearonink (talk) 09:37, 15 January 2013 (UTC)Reply
b. MoS compliance:   Acceptable

2. Accurate and verifiable:

a. provides references:   Needs work
  • In the background section, please cite the sentence "He studied electrical engineering and worked as an electrician for some time in St. Louis, Missouri.". If it's in the next paragraph, just duplicate the citation so that the paragraph with the quoted sentence ends in a citation.
  • Same with "A subsequent investigation concluded that, based on his activity at the school and the purchases of explosives, Kehoe had worked on steps in his plan for at least a year."
  • Same with "Kehoe had free access to the building and his presence was never questioned."
  • Same with "Neighbors reported hearing explosions set off on the farm, as well as recalling conversations where Kehoe explained he was using dynamite for tree stump removal."
  • Same with the first paragraph of the "Day of the disaster" section, which is entirely unsourced.
  • Same with "Neighbors noticed the fire, and volunteer fire departments from all over the area began rushing to the scene."
  • Same with "At about 8:45 a.m., in the basement of the north wing of the school, an alarm clock set by Kehoe detonated the dynamite and pyrotol he had hidden there."
  • Same with "Thirty-eight people, mostly children, were killed in the explosion of the north wing."
  • Same with the first paragraph in the "Truck explosion" section, which is entirely unsourced.
  • Same with "They swept the building and returned to the recovery work." in the Recovery and rescue section
  • Same with "This testimony contradicted statements from others that Kehoe paused after stopping and called Superintendent Huyck over before blowing up his truck." in the Coroner's inquest section
  • Same with "The school board began a separate fund for the repair of the school building." in the section right after
  • Same with "It was used until the 1970s, before replacement by a new school."
  • Same with the uncited bullets in the Legacy section.
b. proper citation use:   Acceptable
c. no original research:   May need work
  • Pending resolution of 2a, this is good. I won't sign off on it until then though.
d. The top of the article suggests 556 children were killed, but this isn't substantiated by the rest of the article?

3. Broad in coverage:

a. covers main aspects:   Acceptable
b. focused/on topic:   Acceptable

4. Neutral:   Acceptable

5. Stable:   Acceptable

6. Image use:

a. license/tagging correct:   Needs work
  • The first is fine because the text is illegible. The second has to be removed, sorry.
  • Disregard the struck portion.
b. relevant/properly captioned:   Acceptable

7. Additional items not required for a GA, but requested by the reviewer:

a. images that should have alt texts have them:   Needs work
  • It's not mandatory to this becoming a GA, but it would be appreciated for compatibility reasons.
b. general catch all and aesthetics:   Acceptable


Comments after the initial review: The reason why I insist on having paragraphs end with citations, even if the citation is in the next paragraph, is that articles evolve over time, and not ending paragraphs with sources means that there's an increased risk that something will get added in between. Which would be bad, because then the first part would have a different source than what it should. Sven Manguard Wha? 04:38, 15 January 2013 (UTC)Reply

Okay, we're good. Promoting now. Sven Manguard Wha?