Talk:Battle of Mosul (2016–2017)/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Nominator: Kaliforniyka (talk · contribs) 23:29, 25 July 2024 (UTC)

Reviewer: Hawkeye7 (talk · contribs) 19:56, 3 October 2024 (UTC)

Placeholder. Review to follow. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 19:56, 3 October 2024 (UTC)

Lead

• Say when the battle was in the first sentence. Otherwise "years prior" makes no sense.

• "It was the largest conventional land battle since the capture of Baghdad in 2003.[70] It was also the world's single largest military operation overall since the 2003 invasion of Iraq and was considered the toughest urban battle since World War II." Although this is sourced in the lead, but it is not in the body of the article. Add it to the body or remove it from the lead.
• "was considered" By whom? Later in the lead some other contenders are listed.

• "The operation, which was called Operation "We Are Coming, Nineveh" " Similarly, this is not in the body. Add it to the body or remove it from the lead.

• " At dawn on 1 November 2016" same here. The lead should be a summary of the body. Add it to the body or remove it from the lead.
• " the Iraqi Prime Minister" al-Abadi. Otherwise the reader is wondering if it was still the same person

• " heavy clashes" Not sure what makes clashes "heavy". Suggest deleting this word.

• "It was estimated that removing the explosives from Mosul and repairing the city over the next five years would require $50 billion (2017 USD),[87] while Mosul's Old City alone would cost about US$1 billion to repair.[11]" Again, not in the body. Add it to the body or remove it from the lead.

• " Stephen J. Townsend' -> Lieutenant General Stephen J. Townsend

Infobox

• Not all of the commanders listed are mentioned in the article. Add to the body or remove from the infobox.
• Leave out the ranks here

• I see no reason to list all the journalists killed etc - move to the body

• If there is controversy about the numbers, that should be in the body, not the infobox. The infobox is not the place for controversies.

Background

• Link "caliphate"

• "laid Improvised explosive devices" De-capitalise the "I"

The Battle

• I don't see why the Paladin image needs to be larger

• "Maj. Gen.", "Lt. Gen.", "Gen." Expand all these abbreviations. These differ from country to country, and many readers will not understand them in any case. We're not that short of bits.

• Delete the "non-primary source needed" tags. They're not needed. Primary sources are okay.

• "9th armored division" should be "9th Armored Division"

• "9th Division" should be "9th Armored Division"

• The article should make it clear that "Daesh" and ISIL are the same thing.

International reactions

• Don't think this section adds much. Consider deletion.

Media coverage

• Media casualties should be here.

Violation of the laws of war

• This section should be with the humanitarian issues section.
• Link Amnesty International

Article is very good and only needs a few changes. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 21:29, 3 October 2024 (UTC)

• Link "Gary J. Voelsky"

No responses in three weeks, so closing. Hawkeye7 (discuss) 23:20, 27 October 2024 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.