Talk:Beauregard Castle, Chippis

Latest comment: 3 years ago by The Rambling Man in topic GA Review

First Translation

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This article is a translation of the corresponding German article de:Burg Beauregard Bubblerock2 (talk) 15:32, 23 October 2020 (UTC)Reply

Second translation and writer's note

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Hi, this article was translated from the french Wikipedia using the same method as Tourbillon Castle (DeepL). I also wrote the french article, which was voted the equivalent of GA earlier this month. As already stated for the Tourbillon Castle GA nomination, I am not fluent in architectural talk, so there might be some mistakes remaining, and I am a relatively unexperienced user of the english Wikipedia so I might have done some things wrong along the way. Thank you in advance for any potential feedback. - Espandero (talk) 19:51, 23 November 2020 (UTC)Reply

GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:Beauregard Castle, Chippis/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 16:29, 6 March 2021 (UTC)Reply


Comments

  • "french" needs an F.
  Done
  • I would link canton appropriately.
  Done
  • Avoid single-sentence paras, especially in the lead, merge them or expand them.
  Done
  • Link technical terms about castles, e.g. cistern.
  Done
  • Owner "foundation" should be F.
  Done
  • Relink items again once you're on the first and subsequent sections following the lead.
  Done
  • " at an altitude " elevation
  Done
  • Infobox has CH code but that's not referenced or mentioned anywhere else.
  Done
  • Infobox says it was built 11/12th century, this is the kind of stuff that should be in the lead if its verifiable.
  Done
  • "english" capital E.
  Done
  • "Some historians placed its construction in 1097, but there is no evidence of this.[8] " somewhat contradicts the point two bullets above this one.
I don't really know how to rephrase that. The point here is that two historians, Schiner and Furrer, stated in the 1850s that the castle was build in 1097, but we don't know why and how they got to this conclusion.
  • " Edward of Savoy. The latter displeased " could merge -> " Edward of Savoy who had displeased "
  Done
  • "brought the Raron affair" caused? And perhaps some explanation of that?
  Done
  • "never to be rebuilt again" remove "to be".
  Done (also removed "again")
  • "Louis Blondel" introduce him, i.e. Swiss archaeologist.
  Done
  • Again avoid single-sentence paras.
  Done
  • "proposed to launch an " ->"proposed the launch of an "
  Done
  • "top of the hill was lowered by nine metres" convert to Imperial units and was this just nine metres of excavation work to see where ruins might start?
Most of the castle was hidden inside the hill. The top was lowered and kept this way to make the whole thing accessible. (  Done for imperial units)
  • "600,000 francs" Swiss? And convert/inflate to something like US$ or £ so it's easier for most readers to compare.
  Done
  • The three images at the end of the "Archaeological discoveries and conservation" are nice but as there's no description for any of them, they're purely decorative and unencyclopedic. Similar comment applies to all the unframed uncaptioned images, consider a "gallery" perhaps or just pick more judiciously so the article isn't overwhelmed with images about which there is no explanation.
Descriptions appear if you put your cursor over them. This can be changed if needed.
  • "2-metre wide and 9-metre" convert units.
  Done
  • "Tourbillon Castle, " overlinked.
  Done
  • "3 and 4 metres high" convert again.
  Done
  • General note: convert all measurements.
  Done
  • "View from above." no need for full and this image might work nicely if it was placed much closer to the map image so it can be compared.
  Done
  • What's "cargneule"?
  Done
  • What's a "postern"?
  Done
  • " on the upper floor. The upper " repetitive.
  Done
  • "castles of Saxon or Saillon" link?
For Saxon, I added a link to the municipality as the caslte's link doesn't exist.
  • "The upper terrace of the castle." etc, don't need a full stop.
  Done
  • Ref authors, either first name last name or last name, first name. Be consistent.
  Done
  • Are there any more categories for consideration?
I can't find any, since the construction date is unknown and the category for the municipality doesn't exist.

That's all I have on a first pass, so I'll put it on hold for now. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 18:37, 7 March 2021 (UTC)Reply

Thank you for taking the time to conduct such a thorough review. Most of the points are covered, the exceptions being commented on separately. - Espandero (talk) 20:37, 7 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
Espandero No problem, thanks for making the changes. The only thing that remains for me are the image descriptions. I would prefer to see captions for the images and perhaps one or two less of them because there are quite a few at the moment... Oh, and there are still quite a few metric values which are not converted to Imperial units... The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 20:47, 7 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
The Rambling Man I have changed the display of the images, I removed two pictures and I think this time I got all of the units. I don't think I can take any more pictures off as I belive the pictures left allow for a complete tour of the castle. - Espandero (talk) 21:04, 7 March 2021 (UTC)Reply
Espandero happy with that, I made a couple of tiny tweaks but now promoting, good work and please do bring some more over from the other Wikipedias you work on! Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 21:13, 7 March 2021 (UTC)Reply