Talk:Bigfin reef squid/GA1

Latest comment: 13 years ago by Obsidian Soul in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sasata (talk · contribs) 17:03, 9 October 2011 (UTC)Reply

I will review this article. Comments in a few days. Sasata (talk) 17:03, 9 October 2011 (UTC)Reply


I will cheekily nip in and add a few comments before Sasata has had a chance. I hope I will be forgiven. --Stemonitis (talk) 18:03, 9 October 2011 (UTC)Reply

  • German spelling rules dictate that it should be "Großflossen-Riffkalmar", not "Gross-".
  • Species synoymy should not be hidden, and probably should be discussed in the text. How did naturalists (e.g. Quoy & Gaimard) come to describe so many species if there is so little variation between populations ("cryptic species")?
  •   Done Unhidden. It was originally there because it took up much of the space on the right side when I first started the expansion and the article was still short. I'll try to add a paragraph or two explaining the large number of synonyms tomorrow.-- Obsidin Soul 20:20, 9 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • WP:COLLAPSE is pretty clear that encyclopaedic content should not be collapsed just to save space. If the synonymy were reproduced in full in the text, then it would be acceptable to have it collapsed in the taxobox (although I would then remove it entirely, I think). As long as it isn't, it shouldn't be hidden. --Stemonitis (talk) 06:36, 10 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • The synonymy should definitely be discussed in the main text, and when it is, it is acceptable to have the synonym list condensed in the taxobox per WP:Collapse, "Collapsible sections or cells may be used in tables that consolidate information covered in the main text, navboxes, infoboxes, or chess puzzles." Sasata (talk) 14:22, 10 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • Use a single variant of English consistently, probably Australian English (= BrE) given its chiefly Australian / NZ / Indian etc. distribution, with only a tiny part of the United States included.
There are lists available (User:SpNeo/Spelling Guide, American and British English spelling differences), but ones I've seen in this article are as follows: --Stemonitis (talk) 06:36, 10 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
UK spelling US spelling Notes
-metre -meter also by using |sp=us in {{convert}}
centre center
colour color although this doesn't necessarily apply to "coloration"
behaviour behavior
fertilise, recognise fertilize, recognize and other similar verbs
  • Is this a reliable source? It's written by an undergraduate, and the writing isn't great, which makes me wonder how reliable the (unreferenced) information is.
  • Hmm... true. That reference is actually inherited from the original stub article before I started expansion. But I think you're right. I'll try to replace it with other sources and remove those I can't verify.-- Obsidin Soul 20:20, 9 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • It would be good (but not a GA requirement) to mark the foreign languages in the Taxonomy section (and the Greek in the Description) using {{lang}}.
  • Shouldn't the etymology be included under Taxonomy and nomenclature, rather than under Description?
  • You changed the spelling of "calamari" to "calamary", claiming that one is used for the animal, and one for the animal as food. I have never heard this distinction before, and it contradicts the cited source. I think it would be better to use "calamari" for both.
  • Fix grammar: "The adult weight ranges between 403.5 to 1,415 g ..."
  • The first sentence of Coloration is ungrammatical: "The upper surfaces are densely covered in chromatophores, and more sparsely on the lower surface". I know what you're trying to say, but "more sparsely" does not refer to "upper surfaces" as the word order currently suggests.
  • "They are usually found within 0 to 100 m (0 to 330 ft) below the water's surface": remove "within".
  • "‰" is not a unit, and so isn't separated by a space; "35‰", for instance, is merely a shorthand for "35/1000".
  • "Their original range extends ..." suggests that the range has changed. Has it?
  • Then that should be clarified in the context, I think. It may be enough just to run the two paragraphs together, but I think some re-wording would also help. Perhaps along the lines of "...Australia and New Zealand (42°N to 42°S and 32°E to 154°W). The range has also expanded to include parts of the Mediterranean Sea. In 2002, bigfin reef squids were first documented in the Gulf of İskenderun..." --Stemonitis (talk) 06:36, 10 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • "... fish, prawns, and other crustaceans" suggests that fish are crustaceans.
  • The first two paragraphs of Hearing should be run together.
  • I have uploaded a reduced version of the video, at File:Sepioteuthis lessoniana 2010 300px.ogv, which should be used inline instead of the full-resolution version, although a link to the full version would be handy, too, probably in the caption.

Comments from a 1st readthrough. I'll go through it again later more closely to check citations, and do a literature search to make sure the "broad coverage" criterion is met. Sasata (talk) 19:59, 13 October 2011 (UTC)Reply

  • lead looks too short in comparison to the length of the article
  Done I hope it's long enough now.
  Done
  • "This was confirmed in genetic studies by Izuka et al. in 1994." citation for this study?
  Done Sorry. I gave the wrong link in the citation. Fixed now. It's the same as the sentence following it - Triantafillos & Adams.
  • "The adults weigh 403.5 to 1,415 g (0.890 to 3.12 lb) for males" grammatical incorrect
  Done Reworded again.
  • I don't think it's necessary to give imperial conversions with measurement values less than a millimetre
  Done Removed.
  • short form binomials should have non-breaking space in them to prevent unsightly line breaks
  • "The strong, curved, and short beaks (rostrum)" should be plural (rostra)?
  Done
  • "lanceolate vane" jargon
  Done Reworded, though I think there really is no other equivalent word for "lanceolate" without having to explain the shape itself.
  • sucker should be linked earlier
  Done
  • link/define papillae, keel, manus, dactylus
  Done We don't have many articles tackling them in-depth. I opted for inline explanations instead. Linked manus and dactylus (which were already defined), reworded keel. Defined papillae.
  • "2 mm (0.079 in)" convert output should have same # of sig figs
  Done
  • "A prominent keel is present on the club" hasn't been explained what the "club" is
  Done
  Done
  • "Whether bigfin reef squids recognise each other individually still remains unknown, however." (imo)
  Done
  • "In 2009, bigfin reef squids and the common octopus (Octopus vulgaris) were studied" a minor point, but they were probably studied before then; the research was published in 2009
  Done Reworded.
  • "Bigfin reef squids exhibit two most common social body patterning" missing "of the"? Could the first three short paragraphs here be combined into one?
  • "Accentuated Gonads", "Spread Arms" (and others): are capitals necessary?
  Done It was per the source, but I have removed them.
  • "This display may indicate reproductive condition." fix grammar
  Done Hm... what's wrong with it? I have reworded it to "It may indicate the reproductive condition of the signalling squid."
  • "Instead of fish, fishermen now harvest bigfin reef squid." All of them?
  Done Removed the sentence. The previous sentence on the fishing industry having to adapt should be enough.
  • retrieval dates aren't required for print-based sources
  Done Removed
  • journal article titles should be consistently title case or sentence case; I like to have article titles in sentence case and book title in title case, but it doesn't really matter as long as it's consistent
  Done Switched all journal article titles to sentence case. Retained title case in websites and books
  • "J. Gen. Physiol." -> journal titles should be consistently either abbreviated or not
  Done Expanded all abbreviated journal titles
I'll come back and expand the lead later.-- Obsidin Soul 03:07, 14 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
Ok, I've expanded the lead.-- Obsidin Soul 07:29, 15 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
Hi, just wanted to say I'm still watching, but have been busy both on & off wiki. Will continue/wrap up review in the next day or three. Sasata (talk) 07:51, 18 October 2011 (UTC)Reply
No worries, take as long as needed. :) Note this is my first GA nom, so I'm learning as much as I can with the corrections as well for future articles.-- Obsidin Soul 00:56, 20 October 2011 (UTC)Reply

Images

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  • Hmm... I'll try to track the images down later tonight and verify copyright. If they can't be found I'll try finding suitable illustrations from public domain/free sources or we'd probably have to remove them altogether.-- Obsidin Soul 00:55, 20 October 2011 (UTC)Reply

Final comments

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  • I've spot-checked a few of the citations, and there were no problems. I'm satisified that the article meets the "broad coverage" criterion. There's a few more interesting & recent papers that might be added to further develop the article, but you're under no obligation to add these for GA; I'm listing them merely in case you or someone else desires to push this to FA.
Title: Chromatophore Activity during Natural Pattern Expression by the Squid Sepioteuthis lessoniana: Contributions of Miniature Oscillation
Author(s): Suzuki Mamiko; Kimura Tetsuya; Ogawa Hiroto; et al.
Source: PLOS ONE Volume: 6 Issue: 4 Article Number: e18244 DOI: 10.1371/journal.pone.0018244 Published: APR 1 2011
Title: Statolith growth of juvenile oval squid Sepioteuthis lessoniana (Cephalopoda: Loliginidae) with special reference to ambient thermal condition
Author(s): Ikeda Yuzuru; Kobayashi Masato
Source: MARINE BIOLOGY RESEARCH Volume: 6 Issue: 5 Pages: 485-495 Article Number: PII 923713191 DOI: 10.1080/17451000903334710 Published: 2010
Title: Mirror image reactions in the oval squid Sepioteuthis lessoniana
Author(s): Ikeda Yuzuru; Matsumoto
Source: FISHERIES SCIENCE Volume: 73 Issue: 6 Pages: 1401-1403 DOI: 10.1111/j.1444-2906.2007.01485.x Published: DEC 2007
Title: Ontogeny of mantle musculature and implications for jet locomotion in oval squid Sepioteuthis lessoniana
Author(s): Thompson JT; Kier WM
Source: JOURNAL OF EXPERIMENTAL BIOLOGY Volume: 209 Issue: 3 Pages: 433-443 DOI: 10.1242/jeb.02017 Published: FEB 2006
I can't find the source of the gladius picture. The dorsal and ventral picture is confirmed from page 317, plate 28 of the 1950-1953 issue of the Bulletin of the British Museum (Natural History). I am not familiar with the copyright laws of the United Kingdom (particularly Crown Copyright) and there is still a possibility that it may be public domain, but as of now I think it's best to treat it as possibly copyrighted (shame, really). Having no possible replacements in existence, I must remove them for now.
I'll have to pass on the additional literature as I don't have the time to seek them out right now. Nevertheless I'll see if I can do that in the future. They seem to be for pay publications so I'll post a request in the resource exchange maybe and see what can be made available for future expansions. Cheers.-- Obsidin Soul 20:35, 6 November 2011 (UTC)Reply
Alright, I think the article now meets the GA criteria, and will promote it. Cheers, Sasata (talk) 06:35, 7 November 2011 (UTC)Reply
Great! :) Thanks for the review and to Stemonitis as well.-- Obsidin Soul 11:15, 7 November 2011 (UTC)Reply