Talk:Blow (Kesha song)/GA1

Latest comment: 13 years ago by Adabow in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Adabow (talk · contribs) 04:44, 20 June 2011 (UTC)Reply

Resolved comments from Lil_niquℇ 1 [talk]
Reviewer:Lil_niquℇ 1 [talk] 23:46, 30 May 2011 (UTC)Reply

Infobox and introduction

Infobox
  •   Done, no issues
Introduction
  • would like to see some variation in sentence starting. lets see the use of the song's name more.   Done
  • straight top ten hit → consecutive top-ten hit (latter is more professionally written).   Done
  • Its not usual to pipe countries to charts.
    • Thats a stylistic choice, i do it because it was asked for her FA nom of her discography.
  • The introduction makes no mention of the song's composition. You could at least mention that its dance-pop and electropop. In fact reading the introduction is not evidence what type of song this is. — Lil_niquℇ 1 [talk] 23:01, 5 June 2011 (UTC) Reply
    • You be blind my friend, "The song is dominantly an electropop and dance-pop song, while the lyrics, described as a party-anthem, portray a simple message of having a desire to have a good time at a club." Last sentence first paragraph.
  • link hook to hook (music)   Done
Writing and composition
  • According to Robert Copsey from Digital Spy,. → add missing comma   Done
  • link for Auto-tune???
    • "Kesha uses layered vocals that are enhanced in some parts with the use of Auto-Tune." is linked there.
  • add date in brackets after "Satifaction" (2002).   Done

Adabow's review

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  • Definitely Kesha's best single... :P
  • Ref 53 (Sony Music Entertainment Korea) is dead   Done
  • "The song was released as the EP's second single on February 8, 2011" - infobox says Feb 25   Done
  • "while the lyrics, described as a party-anthem" - the lyrics are not described as an anthem, the song is. No hyphen in "party anthem" please   Done
  • You should refer to "the song" by its name more than you do at present   Done
  • "Critical reception of the song has been generally mixed to positive. The song's hook and opening have been praised but the song's chorus was met with mixed reaction, some critics praised the song" - change a couple of these instances. Adabow (talk · contribs) 04:27, 23 June 2011 (UTC)Reply
  • "some critics felt that she was both sassy and brash, while other critics felt that her personality was missing from the song" - is brashness really a positive thing?  Not done
    • Yes, Brash has multiple meanings and depends on the context it is used in, this one is used as "Strong, energetic, or irreverent"
  • PhoenixThe Phoenix   Done
  • "Scott Shetler from AOL Radio felt that Kesha's lyrical delivery were both sassy and brash." - "were" should be "was" as it is a singular delivery   Done
  • "Billboards Digital Songs" → Hot Digital Songs   Done
  • "the song reached a peak of three" - number three   Done
  • 2,000,000 would be better written as 2 million, but your choice  Not done. For consistency on her other articles that have specific sales (3.124) im not going to change this.
  • "at one-hundred" - at number one hundred   Done
  • "On the songs third week on the chart the song once again rose this time to position fifty-four." - rewrite   Done
  • "where it became that weeks highest" - apostrophe needed   Done
  • "The following week, the song rose nine positions attaining position eleven." - clumsy   Done
  • "On the songs third week" - apostrophe needed   Done
  • "and her forth overall" - fourth   Done
  • "Two weeks later, on the issue date titled March 13" - rewrite   Done
  • "The next week the song reached it's peak at position ten" - remove apostrophe   Done
  • "later peaking at thirty-two" - number thirty-two   Done
  • The box quote refers to "Van Der Beek", but he has not been mentioned before. I think it would be wise to refer to him by his full name (linked). Also "videos" needs an apostrophe
  • "Van Der Beek then does the same with his bra" - this makes it sound normal for men to wear bras...   Done
  • The music doesn't stop, it just fades into the background during the dialogue   Done
  • "At the end of the video, it's revealed" - no contractions, please   Done
  • "The storyline for the episode saw the shows " - apostrophe needed   Done

Prose quality is the biggest issue here, but it's not far of GA standard. I don't think it's part of the GA criteria, but I can read what looks like close phrasing from sources. I know it can be difficult, especially in 'composition' and 'critical reception' areas, but try to rewrite as much info as possible, or put quote marks around it. Your other major issue is apostrophes. Possesives ending in 's' need apostophe "the song's", "Kesha's", except for "its" (eg "its best week of sales"). Anyway, review is   on hold for seven days. Adabow (talk · contribs) 07:57, 20 June 2011 (UTC)Reply

The lead should refer to the song by name more than it does at the moment, but otherwise I'm happy to list   this article. Adabow (talk · contribs) 04:27, 23 June 2011 (UTC)Reply