Talk:Brad Miller (baseball)/GA1

Latest comment: 3 years ago by Sanfranciscogiants17 in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk · contribs) 12:54, 5 August 2021 (UTC)Reply


I will be reviewing this. Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 12:54, 5 August 2021 (UTC)Reply

References

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Lead

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  • ”Miller was traded to the Rays prior to the 2016 season, and spent the next two years first at the team's shortstop, then first baseman, and finally second baseman” – “Miller was traded to the Rays prior to the 2016 season, where he was used first as the starting shortstop, then as the starting first baseman, and finally as the starting second baseman.” (Assuming he was the starter—if not, replace the starting with a.)
  • I would mention his career high 30 home runs in 2016.
  • “Miller spent only one month within the Brewers organization before he was released from his contract and underwent microfracture surgery to repair a torn hip labrum.” – “Miller spent only one month with the Brewers before getting released. He then underwent microfracture surgery to repair a torn hip labrum.”
  • ”and elected free agency after he was designated for assignment by the Indians” – “and played for the Indians briefly before getting designated for assignment.” Makes clearer that he played in the major leagues for them. Don’t worry about leaving elected free agency out – the lead is not the place to be super-specific, and it can be inferred that he became a free agent based on what follows.
    •   Done went with "made a brief appearance for" instead of "played for the Indians briefly", but I think both clarify that he had some major league games there — GhostRiver 22:51, 8 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • ”After some time” – “After Miller spent some time”

Early life

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College career

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Minor league career

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Seattle Mariners

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Tampa Bay Rays

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  • Link first baseman
  • ”stumbled defensively” – probably should put “struggled defensively”, stumbled might be taken too literally.
  • ” his performance was stronger, as he set the franchise record for most single-season home runs”
  • Also, that sentence isn’t accurate—Evan Longoria’s hit over 30 home runs for the Rays multiple times. If he moved to first base later in the year, he probably didn’t hit 30 home runs at any specific position. Should probably change this to read that he set a career high with 30 home runs.
  • Any highlights from the year? It looks like 2016 was his best season.
  • Delink 2017 MLB season, since the years are not linked for the most part.
  • ”make room in the 25-man roster” – “make room on the 25-man roster”

Milwaukee Brewers

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2019

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  • Since Miller only played in the majors with two of the teams, I would merge the Dodgers section with the Indians section (titled simply, Cleveland Indians) and the Yankees section with the Phillies section (titled simply, Philadelphia Phillies, first stint)
  • ”with an anticipation” – “with the expectation”
  • Link opening day (first mention)
  • If you merge the sections, probably don’t need 2019 in the Indians paragraph.
  • ” On March 24, 2019, Miller signed a one-year, $1 million contract with the Cleveland Indians, where he was expected to replace an injured Jason Kipnis at second base” – He did indeed fill in for Kipnis as the starting second baseman, according to [1]. So what I would do is end the first sentence after Indians, then make the next sentence, “He began the season as the Indians’ second baseman, filling in for an injured Jason Kipnis.” Then, make the third sentence, “When Kipnis returned on May 15, Miller was designated for assignment.” Start the fourth sentence, “Miller was frustrated with the team’s choices, telling reporters…”
  • ”the injured list” – “New York’s injured list”
  • Believe it or not, this is the first time since the lead that infielder has been used, so go ahead and link it.
  • Phillies section looks good!

St. Louis Cardinals

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Second stint with the Phillies

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Player profile

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  • Delink American League, since already linked earlier.
  • The way the section is currently written, it looks like Goldschmidt may have given him the gloves in addition to the mitt. Perhaps put “three different baseball gloves, as well as a first baseman’s mitt given to him by Paul Goldschmidt, depending”

Personal life

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  • Looks good!

Another great article from you. Just some mostly minor changes. Let me know once you’ve made them! Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 23:56, 5 August 2021 (UTC)Reply

Sanfranciscogiants17 Thank you for the review – I believe everything has been addressed! If I'd been chipping away at this yesterday, I'd say something about how I brought Brad luck, but he went 0-for-3 today. Silly me, all I got at the park was, uh, (checks notes) a complete game shutout from Zack Wheeler. — GhostRiver 23:38, 8 August 2021 (UTC)Reply
I'm sure Miller'd be happier going 0 for 3 in a win than 4 for 4 in a loss any day! Article looks great now, passing. Well done once again! Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 01:18, 9 August 2021 (UTC)Reply