Talk:Break Your Heart/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:24, 15 June 2010 (UTC) Alright i am beginning the review. (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:24, 15 June 2010 (UTC)

• "Break Your Heart" was one of two penned by Cruz for UK pop/R&B singer[...]". Was one of two what? I think you need songs before penned.  Done

• "However, according to the song's other co-writer[...]" Im not 100% sure but i pretty sure a sentence should not start with however, please change it.

A sentence can start with however if it is later resolved, in this place with the comma and the subject or verb do not dispute and it is not a fragment. For further clarification, example from the critical reception of FA, 4 Minutes (Madonna song)"

Joan Anderman of The Boston Globe believed that the "song is a sure thing, a chart-topper for its sheer star power as well as instant musical allure, and on the eve of Madonna's 50th birthday [...] '4 Minutes' feels a lot like an icon's can't-miss gift to herself." However, he noticed that the "shift in the power structure [is nowhere] more blatant than on '4 Minutes', where Madonna sounds like a featured guest trying to keep pace with Timbaland's colossal beats and Timberlake's nimble melody."

• 'On collaborating with Ludacris, Cruz said,[...]" I believe you mean While collaborating with Ludacris, Cruz said,

On is the correct term because collaborating with Ludacris is the topic on which Cruz was speaking. While collaborating is not only incorrect, it would state as if Cruz said the statement while he was in the studio collaborating with the rapper.

• Reference number twelve should not be linked to Music Notes, see 4 Minutes to see how it should be properly linked.  Done

• The song includes several tempo changes, which have been compared to that of Jay Sean's "Down".[10] The song is filled with boasting lyrics about being a heartbreaker rather than being heartbroken. Back to back opening statement, please rephrase one or the other.  Done

• "Although BBC Music called the song a "cheese-fest", said "in a weird way it's kind of beautiful", investing in the "Ibiza-inspired R&B trend"." Alright a few errors. 1) Dont open with although as there was no statement before it. 2) Sentence doesn't make sense, needs to be rewritten. (eg: called the song a "cheese-fest", said[...]) Missing a word or 2.  Done

Re-worded statement a bit, but although is fine. As stated above about the word "however", the sentence is resolved and no grammar disputes.

• "The review also compared the song to Dizzee Rascal and Cruz's "layered vocals" and "slick production" to OneRepublic and Timbaland's 'Apologize"." He compared the song to Dizzzee Rascals what?

The reviewer compared it just to Dizzee Rascal, no particular work of his. Added a compared to distinguish.

• Critical reception should be broken up into 2 paragraphs, positive being the first, mixed being the second.

How come it is not better to just combine into one simple paragraph, since it is little anyway. The second paragraph would result in two single sentences, which isn't even a paragraph.

Was just a suggestion, it can be kept as is, it wasnt a major issue, it wouldnt decide if the article would pass or fail. You can leave as is if you prefer. (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:53, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

• Alright, Chart Performance doesn't have nearly enough citations.
  

The song debuted at number one in the United Kingdom becoming Cruz's first song to reach the pole position in that territory.[a] The song remained at the top of the chart for three weeks.[b] The song also peaked at number one in Switzerland, and in the top ten in several other countries across Europe.[c]  Done

Added refs that should take care of it. Candyo32 (talk) 01:05, 20 June 2010 (UTC)

• Why is there no certification section, i could be wrong but with all the charting i would imagine it would have been certified somewhere. (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:24, 15 June 2010 (UTC) Done

Surprisingly I could only find two certs. Added. Candyo32 (talk) 16:57, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

• Dablinks per Diddy, : how to fix  Done

Alright this is what ive noticed right off the bat, please avoid placing responses here as it makes the page extremely long, instead please post any concerns, questions or comments on my talk page under a new section. =) (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:24, 15 June 2010 (UTC)

As an admin told me before in a review, it is better to post fixes on the article's talk page because Wikipedia is a collaborative effort and it is better for other editors to see what's going on with an article's status.Candyo32 (talk) 02:22, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

It really just depends on the reviewer, i archive all discussions and will add the link to the discussions if a problem ever arose. (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 02:33, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

Yeah it does, but still it would be much more easier, simpler and accessible if everything was on the talk page for everyone to see. Candyo32 (talk) 16:57, 17 June 2010 (UTC)

All My concerns have been addressed, i fail to find any other outstanding issues with this article, great work! I am passing the article :) (For all concerns reguarding the prose, the discussion above where issues with the prose, i am not including an actual listing) (CK)Lakeshade✽talk2me 01:27, 20 June 2010 (UTC)