Talk:Brianne Murphy

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Smilie235. Peer reviewers: Girasol10002, TFW4580.

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External links modified

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Feedback

This article has a lot of significant information. The lead paragraph does a good job of emphasizing the importance Brianne Murphy played in the film industry. Consider adding a sentence or two about the work/films for which she is most known. In addition, the use of linking throughout the article was very helpful in ensuring the reader had a better understanding of the article.

I suggest turning the list of filmography credits into a table that lists the project, her role, and the year. Also, in the second paragraph of the career section, I recommend naming the show which she took over for Richard Glouner on and explain a little more of how this project was so significant for her if that information can be found in one of the sources.

This article does a great job explaining the role Brianne Murphy played in the relationship between women’s rights and the film industry. However, I would try and check for bias in this article as some of the sentences seem slightly bias, especially when they are not paired with a reference. For example, when it says “At a young age, Murphy’s’ parents divorced which led to her becoming self sufficient and independent. She created her own opportunities and fought to make her way in a “man’s world” of cinematography.” While the second sentence is paired with a reference, the first sentence is not. What exactly is meant by she became self-sufficient and independent? What opportunities did she pursue and which source led to this claim?

Lastly, I recommend moving some of the sentences around in the third paragraph in the career section. Perhaps start by explaining the gender discrimination she faced and the strategies she took to avoid these instances then transition into how this has defined her as a pioneer for women’s rights in the film industry. In the current paragraph, the order is slightly different.

Also, ensure all links in the reference section are working. When I checked, a few of them weren’t.

Great additions to this article!

TFW4580 (talk) 18:43, 31 October 2018 (UTC)

Peer Review

Great contributions made to this article! The lead is strong and allows a reader to recognize this article is about Brianne Murphy's role as a film maker. The article also has a clear and well organized chronological structure. Significant contributions have been made to the career section of this article but I would recommend if possible to add more information to the Biography section in order to assure the article appears balanced. Overall, the content is neutral and uses reliable and independent resources in order to add important information. In order to ensure the quality I would make sure the few references/links which are not cited properly are functioning. I would also recommend creating some of the lists in the articles into tables and adding links to the films that are mentioned if it is possible (i.e. On The Waterfront has no link but there is an existing article on that film, if it is not the same film mentioned then it is not necessary to add the link). In conclusion, the articles new additions really enhance the quality of the article, great job! Girasol10002 (talk) 02:09, 1 November 2018 (UTC)