Talk:Brown Sugar (D'Angelo album)

Latest comment: 6 years ago by InternetArchiveBot in topic External links modified

Chicago Tribune review

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Transcription using Google News Advanced News Archive Search. Chicago Tribune (Johnson, Martin. 6. August 17, 1995) review of Brown Sugar (1995):

By fusing such elements of Prince, early '70s Smokey Robinson and post-Woodstock Sly and the Family Stone, D'Angelo, a 21-year-old singer from Virginia, has created the most stunning R&B debut of the year. He sings slow jams in a sultry falsetto and his accompaniment, highlighted by such retro touches as organ, Fender Rhodes keyboards and scratchy guitar licks, grows denser and more hypnotic with each song. When they do accelerate into mid-tempo, it's in a straight-ahead jazz groove. He drawls along selling passion and lust as a region of mutual submission rather than the land of conquest that most R&B singers make it. D'Angelo proves there's a lot more to the '70s revival than tacky clothing.

Dan56 (talk) 10:06, 5 September 2009 (UTC)Reply

This article is excellent

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This article is brilliantly complete and cites sources for every claim or fact made 'n I was quite surprised to see that it's not a featured article or even a "Good" article. Someone affix that accolade up there. NIRVANA2764 (talk) 04:23, 28 December 2010 (UTC)Reply

GA Review

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This review is transcluded from Talk:Brown Sugar (D'Angelo album)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Prism (talk · contribs) 16:41, 15 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

Hi! I'll be reviewing this article. From the looks of it, it seems very well written but I believe the corrections I suggest will improve it even more. If the GAN is passed I would suggest a FA candidacy.

Review

Overview

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Prose

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Lead (NOTE: I will not talk here about sentences supported by dead links and other problems, those notes are in the References section of this review.)

Reads smoothly and with flow. However, just one minor correction: "released July 3, 1995, on EMI Music." (the comma isn't required after dates)

Commas after mdy dates per MOS:YEAR. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply
Background

The first sentence is awfully long. Break it in two.

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

"Following the formation of his native-Richmond, Virginia musical group, Michael Archer and Precise, [...]" (is Michael Archer and Precise the name of the group? If so, substitute the commas before and after it with em-dashes.

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "and cash prize" → "and a cash prize"

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— Did the initial group break up? Plus, an interesting detail, he used a mixtape which was originally by the group how? Did he re-record it? With or without permission? Please explain a bit better.

No information available on that I think. I assume he left to pursue his own career. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "After an impressive audition for EMI execs" (Impressive should be in quote marks or the phrase should imply that the execs were the ones that found it impressive.

Revised. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "and at number 28" (remove at, it's redundant)

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "highly promoted showcases" (what kind of showcases?)

Performances, added, done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply
Recording

— "$ 500" → "US$ 500"

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— The first use of FN15 here is redundant.

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "who had previously produced Me'Shell NdegéOcello's debut album Plantation Lullabies (1993).[19]" (I don't think this is relevant to the scope of the article)

Removed. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply
Music and lyrics

— Please retitle "Vocals" to "Vocals and inspiration".

Will "vocals and influences" suffice? Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply
Songs

— Two uses of FN35 which are redundant. (and examples of WP:OVERCITE)

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "Christopher John Farley cited "Higher" as the album's best track.[13]" (Unnecessary)

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— "Misinterpreted as a traditional love song about a femme fatale by most R&B audiences,[10] "Brown Sugar" takes the form of a conventional love song." (Repetition of love song, please reword)

Done. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— While I in no way reprehend a larger text pertaining to the song lyrics and composition, does it really need its own heading?

Yeah, I suppose to make it more accessible for readers. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply
Commercial performance

— Note 1 being used here is redundant... it just says the same that is contained in the section without references.

References (footnotes)

— I'm aware that the body of the article already has the references for it, but please add them to Note 1.

Removed altogether. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

Suggestions

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— You could expand a little on how he promoted the album (e.g.: release of singles [date, music video, etc]; tours; etc)

Added bit about tour and subsequent live album. Not much about this album's promotion among sources though. Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

References

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— While it isn't mandatory for GAs to use citation templates, I believe it would be simpler for readers if the book references linked directly to the 'Bibliography' section. I mean, by using the harvnb template (if you need help let me know).

— Could you set the reflist template to width 3?

— All references need publisher. Billboard's is Prometheus Global Media; NME's is IPC Media, etc.

Per Template:Citation#Publisher, it's "not normally used for periodicals". Dan56 (talk) 01:02, 16 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

— At first I was a bit worried about MVRemix and Music City but now that I see them they seem reputable and well-written. — Please archive the old web links dating to some years ago, because they may eventually "die".

Review history

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Hello fellow Wikipedians,

I have just modified 2 external links on Brown Sugar (D'Angelo album). Please take a moment to review my edit. If you have any questions, or need the bot to ignore the links, or the page altogether, please visit this simple FaQ for additional information. I made the following changes:

When you have finished reviewing my changes, you may follow the instructions on the template below to fix any issues with the URLs.

This message was posted before February 2018. After February 2018, "External links modified" talk page sections are no longer generated or monitored by InternetArchiveBot. No special action is required regarding these talk page notices, other than regular verification using the archive tool instructions below. Editors have permission to delete these "External links modified" talk page sections if they want to de-clutter talk pages, but see the RfC before doing mass systematic removals. This message is updated dynamically through the template {{source check}} (last update: 5 June 2024).

  • If you have discovered URLs which were erroneously considered dead by the bot, you can report them with this tool.
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Cheers.—InternetArchiveBot (Report bug) 03:54, 27 December 2017 (UTC)Reply