Talk:Ched Evans/GA1
Latest comment: 11 years ago by GreatOrangePumpkin in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: GreatOrangePumpkin (talk · contribs) 19:59, 31 July 2012 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
- " After an unspectacular first two seasons at Bramall Lane he scored 35 goals during the 2011–12 season." - Confusing. Is the 2011-12 season = the two seasons? Or is it something different?
- That is the standard way of referring to seasons. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "With first choice opportunities at City limited Evans moved on loan to Norwich City in November of that year, " - I don't understand the first phrase.
- Changed choice to team. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- Who are the "Canaries"?
- Norwich City, have swapped to Norwich. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "and just just"
- Removed the second one.Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "Evans returned to Manchester City after his initial loan deal expired in January 2008 having made eight appearances and scored two goals.[9]" there should be a comma between the date and "having"
- added a comma
- "with Manchester City able to" - shouldn't it be "with Manchester City being able to..."?
- "Evans joined Sheffield United for an initial fee of £3 million plus possible future add-ons on a three year deal in July 2009[15] making his debut for United in the first game of the new season; " - such a long sentence and no commas... but there should be one ahead the footnote
- Comma added Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- I am not a native English speaker, but I feel there are many commas missing. I will request a second opinion and I suggest you find someone who could copyedit this article.
- " He become a regular member of the squad and in November 2007" surely it should be "became"? Or is he still playing for Wales?
- Typo - changed to became. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "On 28 March 2012 Stuart Pearce the Great Britain Olympic football team manager was present at the match against Chesterfield with Ched Evans scoring a hat-trick and scoring his thirtieth goal of the season in a 4–1 at Bramall Lane. " - "On 28 March 2012, Stuart Pearce the Great Britain Olympic football team manager, was present at the match against Chesterfield, with Ched Evans scoring a hat-trick and scoring his thirtieth goal of the season in a 4–1 at Bramall Lane. " Also it could be reworded as the "with...+ing" is rather colloquial, and last scoring should be removed.
- Removed the second scoring and revised the sentence slightly. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "Evans stated about the possibility of representing Team GB at the London 2012 Summer Olympics," - update?
- I've reworded it slightly. Not sure what you mean by update? He is in prison so certainly hasn't been to the Olympics. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- Oops... Perhaps I did this mistake as I reviewed step by step...--Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
- I've reworded it slightly. Not sure what you mean by update? He is in prison so certainly hasn't been to the Olympics. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "After the death of former Wales boss and Sheffield United player, coach and Manager" - why is manager in capitals while coach is not?
- Changed. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- "Evans revealed a message under his shirt after scoring his first goal in the FA Cup win over Torquay United which read:" - comma ahead which, and read - reads
- comma added - read (pronounced red) is the past tense of read so that is correct. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- My mistake. I did not read it carefully. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
- comma added - read (pronounced red) is the past tense of read so that is correct. Bladeboy1889 (talk)
- These are the major issues. The text may need a slight copyedit, but all in all it is ok for GA. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 13:26, 8 August 2012 (UTC)
- Updated the text accordingly. Bladeboy1889 (talk) 12:24, 10 August 2012 (UTC)
- " After an unspectacular first two seasons at Bramall Lane he scored 35 goals during the 2011–12 season." - Confusing. Is the 2011-12 season = the two seasons? Or is it something different?
- a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail:
- Nevermind, I may finish today. Regards.--Kürbis (✔) 08:19, 8 August 2012 (UTC)
- Pass Meets the criteria. --Kürbis (✔) 13:32, 10 August 2012 (UTC)