Talk:Chikaraishi

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Chikaraishi/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sasata (talk · contribs) 20:55, 27 June 2012 (UTC)

I will review this. Should have comments up in a few days. Sasata (talk) 20:55, 27 June 2012 (UTC)

Comments

• the lead is currently pretty short, could it be beefed up a bit?
• per WP:Captions, captions that are not complete sentences should not have periods  Done
• possibly useful links: divination, Shinto shrine, Shinobu, stevedore  Done
• sake-brewers -> hyphen unnecessary  Done
• italicize hojo undō?  Done
• "…featured extremely heavy stones which were lifted" which->that; same in "Rocks which were too heavy…" Done
• according to Parulski (1985), chikaraishi is also used to refer to lighter stones with a handle attached that are used to develop hand a wrist strength while performing stances and exercises. I get the impression, however, from the hojo undō article that these are also called Chi Ishi, which appears to be the same word with some letters removed. Is this worth a mention or clarification?  Done
• is it worth mentioning that sometimes smaller stones were placed by the beds of children to make them stronger, per Frédéric (2002)? How about the alternate names hakara-ishi and bijuru?  Done
• I found some other interesting information from this blog; although it can't be used here as a reliable source, perhaps you have other sources that could be used to verify the information:

• "A priest famous for his physical strength, Benkei, has stones named in his honor, Benkei Ishi　弁慶の力石"  Done
• According to this source, the oldest stones are from the "Hachiman Shrine at Kuki Town, Saitama Pref."; they have another url which might have more information?
• mention the study group at Yokkaichi University who write power stone haiku?

• add a See also link to lifting stone?  Done
• It appears that Shinsuke Takashima has done some extensive research into chikaraishi. Are you able to access any of this literature?
• if available, the article would benefit from an image of someone lifting a stone at a chikaraishi competition
• Takashima (2005) looks like it would have a lot more to say about the subject. Was the number of known stones the only thing worth including from this source? Also, could you include a page# for the citation?
• author and title for ref #5?  Done
• these reference nitpicks are beyond the GA criteria, but I thought I'd mention them anyway (feel free to ignore)

• Carter and Krüger (1982) and Nelson (1987) are given in sentence case, rather than title case like the others  Done
• isbn for Jōya 1985?  Done
• page #'s for Juhn 1977?
• formatting in ref #13 needs tweaking (too much italicization) Done
• ref #7: page range should have endash

Reponse to review Thank you very much for this extensive review. Most of the comments raised have been addressed (see above). I'd just like to mention those that have not been dealt with, and why not, for the benefit of future editors.

1. "the lead is currently pretty short, could it be beefed up a bit?" I've added an extra sentence, but I can't see how to expand it much further - at present, it seems to me to summarise the rest of the article fairly concisely.
2. "According to this source, the oldest stones are from the "Hachiman Shrine at Kuki Town, Saitama Pref."; they have another url which might have more information?" Really useful blog link, thank you for that. The Hachiman info actually comes from Takashima (more on him in a second). I haven't used it because the info is rather vague and seems to clash directly with the info in Guttmann & Thompson.
3. "mention the study group at Yokkaichi University who write power stone haiku?" I'm not convinced this is really relevent to the article (after all, we don't mention William Wordsworth in the article on Daffodils) so have not included it.
4. "It appears that Shinsuke Takashima has done some extensive research into chikaraishi. Are you able to access any of this literature?" Takeshima's work is all in Japanese, which I don't read or speak sufficiently; in addition, none of it appears to be availble for free. I've added some info from Takashima's website, and I've asked another editor with experience of Japanese academic publishing if he'd mind taking a look.
5. "if available, the article would benefit from an image of someone lifting a stone at a chikaraishi competition" I've failed to find anything that's appropriately licensed, although such pictures certainly exist. I've emailed the Okayama Powerlifting Club (who produced these photos) to see if they'd be willing to release anything under CC-BY-SA.
6. "Takashima (2005) looks like it would have a lot more to say about the subject. Was the number of known stones the only thing worth including from this source? Also, could you include a page# for the citation?" This originally came from the Japanese wikipedia page on chikaraishi, sadly, sans page numbers. Since I don't have access to the document, I don't know which pages contain the information.
7. "page #'s for Juhn 1977?" I've no idea, sorry. Can't even remember where I found this; I certainly don't seem to be able to find it again.

• It's on Google Books, but I can't access the article where I am. Sasata (talk) 06:18, 12 July 2012 (UTC)

1. "ref #7: page range should have endash" Not sure which reference is meant here; there's no dash (m or n) in ref 7.

• Fixed. Sasata (talk) 06:18, 12 July 2012 (UTC)

Once again, my thanks for your helpful comments. Perhaps you would be kind enough to re-review against the criteria now? Yunshui 雲‍水 13:39, 11 July 2012 (UTC)

I've made a number of minor tweaks to the article, and added several links–feel free to revert anything you don't agree with. I think the article meets GA criteria: the prose is fine and complies with the MoS; the sources I checked confirm the article citations; no issues with close paraphrasing/plagiarism; both images have proper licenses. I suspect that consultation with Takashima's work would help to fill out some details, but as it is now the article certainly meets the "broad coverage" criterion required for GA. Happy to promote the article now. Cheers, Sasata (talk) 06:18, 12 July 2012 (UTC)

History/divination

Have you considered adding dates associated with names and periods of Japanese history? This would help readers not familiar with Japan out tremendously.

Have you considered reorganizing the History section into chronological order, and breaking it up by broad period? The section lends itself to that treatment. À la:

Ancient period

Middle ages

Modern period

Divination section: the practice of ishi-ura is an established fact, as evidenced by the literature. I'd reword/remove the sentence "The prevalence of the stones in Shinto shrines and temples has led to speculation that rock-lifting was used for divining the future" to maybe "The prevalence of the stones in Shinto shrines and temples across Japan is associated with divination practices involving the use of chikaraishi." Prburley (talk) 18:24, 11 July 2012 (UTC)

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