Talk:Chrysomya bezziana
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![]() | A fact from Chrysomya bezziana appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 2 April 2009 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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![]() | Chrysomya bezziana received a peer review by Wikipedia editors, which is now archived. It may contain ideas you can use to improve this article. |
Pictures
editAs of this time, I haven't been able to find any pictures that are considered free images under Wikipedia's copyright law. Also, because the fly resides in the Old World, I have yet to find anyone willing to send a specimen so I can take a picture (and I have emailed quite a few people). If you find any images that could be considered free, please let me know! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 23:05, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
Case studies
editThis is frickin' horrifying. Seegoon (talk) 17:48, 2 April 2009 (UTC)
Evaluation
editI liked the article. I feel better informed about Chrysomya bezziana. I have a few things that I think would help make this article even better.
1.) In the first sentence you mentioned that this species is a obligate parasite and you only link the word parasite. I did some research on obligate and I found a few links that went information about obligate parasites. I was just going to suggest that you link both of the words instead of just one.
2.) The section of Geographic Distribution was confusing to me. It did not have anything besides facts. I found myself skipping over it because I could not understand what was going on. I would recommend adding a few sentences and not making it only facts.
I particularly like your sections entitled Medical and Forensic Importance and Case Studies. I think these sections are very informative and I was really interested in what was said. Overall I think this article is good. Ac22 (talk) 11:28, 9 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for your imput! However, I'm not sure what else we can add to the Geographic distribution besides facts on where it is located, especially since this is an encyclopedia article. There are a few other sentences in it of interest, talking about how some are worried that it could cross borders into their country. I'm not sure what else we can add; if you could be more specific with suggestions that would be great! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 21:22, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
I think the introduction for the site is very thorough, but should be less specific. I would try to cut down on all the information and be a little broader. For instance "Because the loss of living tissue can cause permanent damage, or even death if left untreated, the infestation of wounds by C. bezziana has led to much public concern. Those most susceptible to infestation of the fly include debilitated patients not completely able to care for themselves and their wounds properly. It is possible to control both the adult and larvae with insecticides and proper hygiene, and it is possible to remove an infestation with forceps." You could simply say, "The infestation of wounds by C. bezziana has led to much public concern" and leave the rest of that information for a specific section. Also, could you find any pictures? I think y'all did a great job on the site! There was a lot of information and it was easy to read. Klfoster (talk) 20:20, 11 April 2009 (UTC)KLFoster
Thanks for the suggestions! And we are still trying to work on getting pictures for the article. Nrey2009 (talk) 18:30, 12 April 2009 (UTC)
This is a very well written article. The characteristics of both the larvae and adults is very detailed. You described the fly as it would in a key or in a paper, which is great. Some the terminology may be over the normal reader's head, but you solved that by linking all of the features to other wiki pages. I only have one question that I don't think it was talked about in your article. Is there, or has there ever been, any atemps to erradicate Chrysomya bezziana? Perhaps using sterile males as done with Cochliomyia hominivorax. --Ctamez (talk) 01:16, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks for the suggestion! I just put up a new paragraph dealing with this. Thanks for your advice to check it out. Dachshundcrazy (talk) 23:49, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
The article is good for the most part but there are some things involving grammar that need to be addressed:
- The first sentence under case studies needs to be rewritten. Possibly try prefacing with "In a 2009 case study..." or something to that effect.
- Also under the case studies section, the second sentence could be combined with the third sentence to flow better and not seem so choppy.
- In the first sentence under the research section, all the extra stuff within the parentheses is sort of distracting. If it is not important for the meaning of the sentence, I would suggest taking it out or rewording it. Also the last sentence of the section seems a bit confusing; fly and the mention of C. bezziana seem redundant.
Overall, the article is informative and the rest looks fine. I hope this helps. --Jdarnell (talk) 06:00, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thank you very much for your help! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 14:20, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
Suggestions
editYour overall page was very well written, I thoroughly enjoyed the case study section. There wasn't much information in the current research section, I either suggestion elaborating on it more or taking it out entirely.
There are other few details I would fix such as, under the characteristics like C. homnivorax and C. macellaria to the other wiki pages, and under the adults characterists I would define frons. Under the life cycle, instead of just saying imago, say "imago, the adult stage..." for clarification.
Definately a very informative and enjoyable page! Emmalee1250 (talk) 21:43, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thank you for your suggestions!Dachshundcrazy (talk) 14:20, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
I think this article is really good! I especially liked the “management and Control” section that was very interesting and detailed. I do think that adding some pictures would really help if that’s possible. It would allow that reader/researcher to understand the “characteristics” segment better because they would have a good visualization of the insect. Also, the words that you linked to other pages only have to be linked once in the article; just the first time that word is used. For instance the word “myiasis” isn’t linked the first time it was used but then it was linked a few times after that. There were also a few fairly common words that could have been linked, such as “maggot,” “pathogen” and “carrion.” Other than that, I thought it was really informative and well put together. Karalin11 (talk) 23:46, 13 April 2009 (UTC)
I agree with the others that this page was very well written and super informative, I would suggest more info in the research section if there is any. It seems like this species is very important because of myiasis. Also maybe do a compare/contrast between this species and Cochliomyia hominivorax--Anniemto (talk) 02:55, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
Minor Edits
editVery good job on your article, it really covers the species well. Some minor changes that may be made include: 1)In your characteristics section I would have found a wikilink to Cochliomyia hominivorax and Cochliomyia macellaria to be helpful. 2)Also, in your life cycle section, this sentence: "Wounds as small as a tick bite is enough for a female to lay her eggs." The "is" needs to be replaced with "are". 3)Finally, in your current research section you said that there was research published in January 2008. Maybe you could include the journal or source of where that information was found so that readers can research that publiction further.--Skk1214aggie (talk) 23:58, 14 April 2009 (UTC)skk1214aggie
- Thanks for your suggestions! We didn't wikilink C. hominivorax because we linked it earlier in the paper, and it only needs to be linked once. Also, there is yet to be a page created on C. macellaria as of yet. Thanks for the grammar note! Also, I don't feel we need to list the names of the journals, as we have it referenced by in-line citations. So, should the reader want to read more, they can look at the citation for all of the information about the publication. Thanks again for your help! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 23:11, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
Congratulations on having this article appear on the main page! Minor Edits: In the Geographic Section, there are semi-colons (;) in between regions where the flies are found. "It is most prevalent in Southeast Asia; tropical and subtropical Africa; some countries in the Middle East; India; the Malay Peninsula; the Indonesian and Philippine Islands; and Papua New Guinea." Replace (;) with commas (,) Interesting article.--Quatre127 (talk) 17:54, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks so much for your suggestion! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 23:11, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
Very good article. I do have a few suggestions to improve your article. Under Characteristics: blowflies needs to be blow flies because the order Diptera are true flies and are designated as such. Under the intro paragraph and the Larva section maybe change missing to lacking? Missing implies the processes should have been there and weren't. In the Life cycle section a picture of myiasis would be awesome! I know you are having difficulty finding pictures of your species but that might spice the page up some more. I also noticed there are several paragraphs that do not have references at the end of the paragraph. My last suggestion is more a comment really about the Management section: I am not sure I would recommend the use of pesticides for controlling larvae in open wounds. Maybe I misread it however it would be bad advise if someone put a really toxic pesticide in their open wound and then died as a result of the pesticide entering their bloodstream. Overall, I liked the article and thought the descriptions of myiasis were intriguing! KathrynR (talk) 01:42, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
- Thanks so much for your advice! According to several of our sources, they said "8. When fly larvae have infested hosts, larvae can be controlled by removing them from the hosts by forceps. They can also be killed by applying suitable insecticide to the infected areas."[1] Several websites said it along those same lines, just different wording. I took that to mean that there are some insecticides out there that could be applied to the wounds; however, I might have read it wrong as well. I'll definitely check into it. Thanks! Dachshundcrazy (talk) 14:20, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
That is definitely an informative article yall made. The case study was pretty gnarly sounding. There is a couple of things that I would look into however. In the opening statement I would not start off the sentence with because and instead start off with since. I would also make some more internal links. Maybe try linking frons and peritreme of you can. Great article!Jcsaucier (talk) 14:32, 16 April 2009 (UTC)
I feel like the article is informative and well written, but a few suggestions are that maybe in the forensic importance section of the page information specifically regarding Chrysomya bezziana could have been added, like what stage this insect begins to occupy a body, or even complications that arise that prevent occupation of said bodies. Including pictures would also have been helpful. However, i really loved that the topic of medical importance was included. Great job!SBarr1551 (talk) 16:33, 17 April 2009 (UTC)
References
- ^ "Chrysomya bezziana." Food and Environmental Hygiene Department. 07 Mar. 2006. Government of Hong Kong Special Administrative Region. 12 Mar. 2009 < http://www.fehd.gov.hk/safefood/pest-post-chrysomya.html>.
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