Talk:Coat of arms of Singapore/GA1
GA Review
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I have this on hold pending a couple of issues I have that, I think, can easily be rectified. It's a short article and I understand you don't have too much to work with, but that doesn't mean it can't be improved.
- The intro could be expanded a little bit. Enough to support two paragraphs ... you could take a bit more from the history and put it up there.
- I think you could use a PNG 2D version of the coat of arms, as seen here, and put it in {{infobox coat of arms}} It's a little hard to focus on it in the gate pic as the ironwork competes with it for your attention, and in any event it's not a color rendition. Using the infobox, IMO, would help a reader who wants salient info quickly.
- There is a common problem with our articles ... overuse of the passive voice. I will go through some copy issues in more depth later. Daniel Case (talk) 06:13, 2 February 2009 (UTC)
OK, more. ...
In the last sentence we learn that "While the use of the coat of arms is restricted to the government, the symbol enjoys wide use on the national currency, state decorations and appears on the cover of the national passport." That's not surprising, and we don't need that level of detail in the intro.
Perhaps we could explain what the five stars and moon symbolize rather than assuming people will click on the flag article for it?
I will go through later and try to tighten up the wording. Meanwhile these need to be addressed. Daniel Case (talk) 05:23, 3 February 2009 (UTC)
- There has been no response to these queries in a few days. I therefore must fail the article. Daniel Case (talk) 13:51, 5 February 2009 (UTC)