Talk:Cool-A-Coo

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Cat Phou. Peer reviewers: Kyubei, Xchen0417, Haleyjlerner, Aylakad.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 19:29, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Feedback

@Cat Phou: Greetings! Good start with this article!

• The references look good and I'm feeling pretty positive about notability.
• You use pretty extensive quoting in your article from the sources you reference. This is very usual and I think not normal in encyclopedia articles. I would keep the references but rephrase or rewrite the sentences. This is done for several reasons.
• One important one is that you want to make sure that you use a neutral point of view. This might be hard to do if you are quoting. As a result, you might want to watch for language like "a local delicacy" or "loyal fans" which sounds like something that the manufacturer would say but that might not be very neutral or encyclopedic.

I think it's ready to go once you make these changes. —mako๛ 23:06, 23 October 2015 (UTC)

Feedback

@Cat Phou: Nice article! Corrected a few grammatical errors and spelling errors, and addressed some factual mistakes (the new recipe was heavily unchanged from the old one). I also merged the recipe section into the history section because it focuses less on the actual recipe of the item but rather the history behind coming up with the "new" recipe.

Kyubei (talk) 02:36, 31 October 2015 (UTC)

Feedback

@Cat Phou Nice article! Perhaps you may want to write about the effects the missing ingredients may/may not have on the sales? Besides that, it was interesting to read :) Xchen0417 (talk) 10:06, 31 October 2015 (UTC)

Final Feedback

Hello,

I have followed your article the past week and and it has improved greatly. With the previous student edits and other reviews, there is nothing more I have to critique (and trust me I checked the grammar!) Good job on picking a cool topic.

-Haley Lerner — Preceding unsigned comment added by Haleyjlerner (talk • contribs) 04:04, 6 November 2015 (UTC)

Feedback

First off, I really like that you are writing about ice cream! I think your article was pretty solid and concise. You seem to have taken previous feedback into account and set the neutral tone to the article. It really looks like any other article I would see on Wikipedia. I suggested this to someone else though it is not a necessity: add a picture! That is my only advice to you since you seem to have fixed everything else. With all that being said, well done on your article! --Aylakad (talk) 13:07, 9 November 2015 (UTC)