Talk:Dan McGugin/GA1
Latest comment: 7 years ago by Kaiser matias in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Kaiser matias (talk · contribs) 01:28, 14 May 2017 (UTC)
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not) |
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Overall: |
- "...compiling a record of 197–55–19." Make a note for the record there that it's win-loss-tie.
- In regards to the quote by Newman, maybe specify who is he is and why his opinion matters. Just something simple like "Zipp Newman, a contemporary journalist (or however you want to distinguish him), once wrote..."
- The Vanderbilt section just starts with him being coach. Is there any details on how he got to that position, as it is kind of abrupt.
- "He remains the only coach in NCAA history to win his first three games by 60 points." Is there a reference for this?
- The caption for the image of Guliver and its reference for McGugin should note its a quote from a sportswriter.
- "...for the crown of the south..." Shouldn't South be capitalized here?
- "The Atlanta Constitution voted..." The second half of this paragraph has no citation.
- "After his first losing season in 1914..." No citations at all for this paragraph.
- "The 1917 season featured Vanderbilt's worst-ever loss, 83–0 to Georgia Tech." Reference?
- "'The Texas game, sparked by McGugin's unforgettable oratory, was the big one.'" What is this quote from, and it will need a reference.
- "...McGugin tapped his fingers on the floor and began..." The other larger quotations have their reference at the end of the quote, while this one has it before. For consistency I'd suggest moving it to the end like the others.
- "Next season Wade left to coach Alabama..." This should start its own paragraph.
- "McGugin selected: Bull Brown..." Is there anyway to either expand this part, or move it into a different paragraph? Just the one sentence like that is awkward.
- Consider moving the family section into the early life section; it's short enough and early enough in his life to not disrupt anything, and would look better.
- The legacy section is just one line. Is there not anything more to add to that, perhaps how he was viewed by contemporaries or those who came after him? Anything to expand it a bit.
- The lead notes he was a lawyer by profession, yet there is not one mention of it throughout the article. Is there no details on where he practiced law, seeing how it was important enough to mention in the lead?
- References: 30 and 52 are deadlinks.
That is all for now. Kaiser matias (talk) 01:28, 14 May 2017 (UTC)
- Think I covered them all. Cake (talk) 00:12, 18 May 2017 (UTC)
- Looks good. Just one question though, is it possible to expand the lawyer section at all, or is that as much as can be said about him in that field? Kaiser matias (talk) 02:21, 20 May 2017 (UTC)
- It's slow going with the lawyer additions. Most sources say no more than he taught law and was a corporate lawyer. I tried to add a bit. 15:16, 31 May 2017 (UTC)
- It' definitely more fleshed out than before, and gives a better look at him, so I'm going to give it a pass. However feel free to add more if you find it. Kaiser matias (talk) 10:01, 4 June 2017 (UTC)
- It's slow going with the lawyer additions. Most sources say no more than he taught law and was a corporate lawyer. I tried to add a bit. 15:16, 31 May 2017 (UTC)