Talk:Eberhard II, Count of Württemberg

Latest comment: 12 years ago by Ellayhere in topic Offer of contribution and help

Offer of contribution and help

edit

Hi,

I would like to offer to help by fixing up a few bits of the english in this article which do not read well for a native english speaker such as me. Normally I would just make those changes as minor changes and not ask first but there is one paragraph which needs a change which would not necessarily be a minor change since the meaning of one sentence has to change. It is this:

A sensation was created 1367 by the assault of Count Wolf von Eberstein on Eberhard II and his son Ulrich during their stay "in Wildbad" (presumably Wildbad or Teinach). Both fled and seized Neueberstein Castle immediately with a large amount of men. However this siege turned out to be unsuccessful.

The second sentence states that Eberhard and his son 'seized the castle', the third sentence that 'this seige' was unsuccessful. I would imagine that the second sentence should therefore read 'They fled, returned shortly thereafter with a large number of men and laid seige to the castle.' — Preceding unsigned comment added by Ellayhere (talkcontribs) 13:47, 14 May 2012 (UTC)Reply

If anyone would care to comment I have now made a start on a new version of this page - which can be found in my sandbox, making changes to the structure and english but also at present only highlighting rather than resolving some substantive issues. And if this isn't enough info to guide users to where I have put this draft then I apologise and would welcome advice and guidance. This is my first attempt at getting properly involved. Ellayhere (talk) 21:32, 16 May 2012 (UTC)Reply