Talk:El Chico del Apartamento 512/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Czarkoff (talk · contribs) 11:21, 7 January 2012 (UTC)

Status

This section is supposed to be edited only by reviewer(s). Please address the items in Discussion section by their numbers (eg., 1(a)1).

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.	Infobox and Background and production disagree on genres.  Done I'm a bit puzzled with the phrase "Promotional single by Selena from the album Amor Prohibido". How can it be released a year later then the album featuring it? ω Awaiting The words "from Amor Prohibido" in the caption of Infobox imply that the song was released within the album; on the other hand, the word single suggests that the song was also released separately. If it was released both in album and as a single, the earlier date should be stated in Release date in Infobox. The phrase ""El chico del apartamento 512" one of the first songs composed for Selena's fifth studio album Amor prohibido (1994)" in Background and production section lacks either verb or comma.  Done It should be either '"El chico del apartamento 512" was one of the first songs composed for Selena's fifth studio album Amor prohibido (1994)' or '"El chico del apartamento 512", one of the first songs composed for Selena's fifth studio album Amor prohibido (1994)'. Same section reads: "The song was written by lead keyboardist of the group, Ricky Vela with collaborative writing credits given to A.B. Quintanilla III, brother and music producer of Selena." Why the order is reversed in Infobox?  Done Same paragraph reads: "While it was produced by Joshua Munoz, Bebu Silvetti, Steven Torres and James Moore." Why difference with Infobox? ω Awaiting The statement lists less people then the Infobox. The same sentence: writing "while" implies the existence of the other part of sentence. So, while what it was produced? ω Awaiting The word while shows the concurrency of two or more events, but the phrase contains only one event. Either this sentence should be joined with another statement the word while was supposed to refer to, or the word while should be omitted. The sentence "The song's lyrics describes a girl who lives in an apartment complex, who always get hit on by random guys she is not interested in." in the second paragraph of Composition and lyric content section needs to be rewritten not to have two words "who". Mind punctuation.  Done The wording "which makes her heart jump" look neither necessary nor encyclopedic.  Done The sentence "she discovers its her new neighbor from the apartment number 512." should start from a capital latter; the word "its" should be at very least replaced with "it's". Probably the sentence should be rewritten together with previous to form one phrase.  Done The sentence "This triggers her to think about him, write him love letters and when she bumps into him in the apartment corridor she gets shy and acts like she is not interested in him" should be probably split, as it currently reads as "this triggers here to (1), (2) and (3)", while (3) is another statement, which isn't grammatically in line with the previous one.  Done I would recommend to rewrite the paragraph entirely minding grammar and text flow, as most of the sentences feel disconnected. Not sure In the phrase "an extended version [...] had an extension" (italics added) in the first paragraph of the Live performances the word extension should be replaced.  Done The word booked in the same paragraph of the same section sounds weird.  Partly done As I get it, only events can be scheduled. The use of the word to schedule with people is a spoken language shortcut. Such shortcut usage on Wikipedia is a bad practice. The phrase "She wore a purple bodysuit, which she was buried in" suggests that she was buried at the end of performance. This detail should b either omitted or rephrased to make the time shift clear.  Done The same sentence contains two independent parts. Consider splitting.  Done The second paragraph of the same section has a following sequence: "During Selena's half-hour spot on the Johnny Canales Show in mid-1994, Selena wore one of her original deigns from Selena Etc. Similar to the "Noche De Carnaval" concert, Selena didn't ..." Either rephrase or replace the even mentions of the name with "she".  Done In the first paragraph of Critical reception section the quote "... we [all] know" probably shouldn't feature the word "[all]".  Done
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	The quotation marks should comply with WP:MOS § Quotations within quotations.ω Awaiting There should be no double quotes inside double quotes. Quotes must match. Genres capitalization needs more attention. Currently, it is inconsistent even within the article.  Done
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.	The references to sources in English should not have their "language" attribute set. The sources in other languages should be marked as such. Is the "La Musica Del Ano" MTV show in English?
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).	I think it is not a good idea to use iTunes Store as a reference. These should probably be replaced. It seems dubious that there are no online sources about the pop song. ω Awaiting One of the references is from Musicnotes.com. Why it isn't linked? The references overall are inconsistent in their formatting. In my opinion, in order to save much time for all parties involved, this issue is best addressed with porting them to Citation Style 1.  Done The reference №2 (as of this revision) is unclear. I fail to identify the meaning of its parts.  Done This diff raises reasonable concerns over the original research and fact checking in the article. ω Awaiting As I explained below, the fact was challenged and thus should be proved with reference. The first paragraph of the Critical reception ends with an opinion, attributed to the author of the preceding quote. If the opinion is expressed in the same source, the reference should be moved to the end of the paragraph. If not, the opinion should be referenced separately. ω Awaiting The phrase "She also stated that ..." must be referenced, but it isn't. The second paragraph of the same section features unreferenced sentence "Meléndez's comments towards the song were upsetting to some Puerto Rican fans, who wrote to the newspaper, many of them stated that Meléndez 'does not know what music is'." ω Awaiting The source must be provided.
	2c. it contains no original research.	See above
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.	The image for the Infobox should have a fair use rationale template instead of a list it currently features. All of GANs and FAs have this. Jonayo! Selena 4 ever 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC) Same goes for music sample. Same as above. Jonayo! Selena 4 ever 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC) Music sample is 30s long, but per WP:SAMPLE § What is the maximum length permitted? it should be no longer then 10% of original length (3:29), which is 20.9s.  Partly done Per my talk page I am unable to upload any files. So I'll remove, Jonayo! Selena 4 ever 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.
	7. Overall assessment.	The review is interrupted as reviewer goes offline for 10 days. See note in Discussion subsection.

Discussion

I  Fixed everything that I could. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)

Why was it so hard to act as instructed? This section is supposed to be a place for comments, not the table! — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

1b1: removed {{done}}. The Background and production sections features double quotes nested in double quotes and «""'"» in the end. The Critical reception also suffers from the problem. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

2a1: removed {{done}}. As of current state the references №№ 3, 6, 10 and 11 are not marked as Spanish. The reference № 5 is marked as English. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

2b1:

All over GANs use iTunes Store over Amazon.com. Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)

OK. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

2b2:

I'm sorry that no one has written about the song since its release in 1995 that is available online for public viewing. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)

The "work=Musicnotes.com" parameter of one of the references suggests its availability on the net. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

2b4:

It's a documentary about Selena's life. Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)

The "station = N/A" option is puzzling. Either this is the station's name (wikilink, please) or it means "no any". In the latter case the parameter should be blanked. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

2b5:

It's not my fault that I was unable to undo all vandalism on sight. Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 23:43, 13 January 2012 (UTC)

You misinterpreted the event: the fact is challenged, so it has to be proved with reference. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 11:56, 14 January 2012 (UTC)

I've  Done everything listed. Best, Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 02:08, 16 January 2012 (UTC)

A considerable amount of work is already done. I would prefer to pass this, though the remaining issues don't allow me. Could you at least comment on why you can't cope with the rest of it? — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 08:29, 17 January 2012 (UTC)

I don't understand what you mean in those. Can you please explain further? Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 17:39, 17 January 2012 (UTC)

I gave the explanations in the table. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 18:52, 17 January 2012 (UTC)

Oh I see it,  Doing... Jonayo! ^{Selena 4 ever} 18:54, 17 January 2012 (UTC)

This statement "I'm a bit puzzled with the phrase "Promotional single by Selena from the album Amor Prohibido". How can it be released a year later then the album featuring it?" - it happens all the time in popular music. So you want me to put that the single was released a year later? Isn't that redundant since the release date is also in that section?

See, if it is mainly known as a single, you should change the wording to "Promotional single by Selena for the album Amor Prohibido". If it is more known as a song from album, the Infobox (title, dates) should reflect the album's properties. You can't go both right and left simultaneously. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 20:00, 17 January 2012 (UTC)

I'm quite busy with preparing to my wikivacation (I'll be offline from 2012-01-21 till 2012-01-31, and I'm too busy today to devote sufficient time to GA process), so I fail this nomination. I would also note that the article is very close to GA status, though some problems (as noted above) are yet to be solved. I asked the nominator to renominate the article as soon as possible. — Dmitrij D. Czarkoff (talk) 08:07, 20 January 2012 (UTC)