Talk:Erythranthe/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Cwmhiraeth (talk · contribs) 12:44, 18 April 2017 (UTC)

I propose to take on this review and will study the article in detail shortly. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 12:44, 18 April 2017 (UTC)

Some preliminary thoughts

• If you want to discuss the etymology of the name, it is probably best to have a section devoted to it, or you could have an "Etymology and taxonomy" section.
  • I renamed it to "Etymology and Taxonomy" is that what you meant? HalfGig talk 01:26, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

I was thinking you would be moving in all or part of the first paragraph of your Description section. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:46, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

 Done I agree. This is better. HalfGig talk 21:11, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

• The Description section should be a description of the general characteristics of the group, see Cucurbita, an article you know well, for what I mean. Zombia is another example.
• Do you need to have two species lists? Do they contain the same species, or are some species in one and not the other?
  • Since there are so many and there are significant section differences, I thought making two helped seeing the larger picture and if you want to know what's in a section, it's easy to do so, and likewise for having a straight listing. HalfGig talk 01:26, 21 April 2017 (UTC)
• Personally, I would put the species lists at the end of the article because otherwise people may not even find the text below.
  • Y Done. Since there are so many, I see the merit to this, note Cucurbita has it the way I first had it. HalfGig talk 01:26, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

I think that is a considerable improvement, leaving the main part of the article more rounded and compact. I will now study the article in detail and continue with the rest of the review. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 09:41, 21 April 2017 (UTC)

• Alternatively, you could consider separating the species into a List of Erythranthe species as happens in the Attalea and Stylidium articles. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:23, 18 April 2017 (UTC)

First reading

• "Flowers are red, pink, or yellow, often in various combinations." - This information in the lead should be included in the body of the text.
  • moved. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• The first paragraph of the "Description" section should be moved to after the second paragraph.
  • done. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• Your description of Erythranthe guttata should finish with mention of the fruits and seeds.
  • Added by me. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:14, 27 April 2017 (UTC)
• I still think, as mentioned above, that you additionally need to mention the characteristics of the genus, why the members are included in the genus and not in Mimulus or elsewhere.
  • Still working on the description section. Prob need a few more days, please. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• "Diplacus is clearly derived from within Mimulus s.l. and was not usually considered to be generically distinct." - Did you mean "generically" or "genetically"?
  • fixed. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• "Erythranthe was greatly enlarged to include 111 species (species with axile placentation and long pedicels)." - This information should be included additionally in the "Description" section, because it is this that seperates the genus from other members of the Phrymaceae family.
  • working. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
    • Done. HalfGig talk 00:10, 29 April 2017 (UTC)
• "The perennial and annuals differ ..." - This sentence is too long and convoluted, and shouldn't it be "perennials"?
  • Took a stab at it. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• "All six of these species ..." - Which six species are you referring to?
  • clarified. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• "Members of this genus are found in eastern Asia; several species of which have a high degree of similarity some the species found in North and South America." - This sentence is a bit muddled.
  • added "with" HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)

That's all for now. It is quite a challenging article because of the complexity of the taxonomy of the genus. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 11:05, 22 April 2017 (UTC)

• • Yes, it's more challenging than most. HalfGig talk 17:36, 22 April 2017 (UTC)
• Give me a ping when you are ready for me to look at the article again. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:53, 30 April 2017 (UTC)
  • @Cwmhiraeth: I will. This has been harder than I expected but I do want to finish. I'm almost done with what I can do and at this point am waiting on input from someone else, who, unfortunately, has been delayed by real life obligations. I fully intend to finish. Thank you for your patience and understand. HalfGig talk 18:59, 30 April 2017 (UTC)
    • @Cwmhiraeth: The guy still hasn't given me his input. He's way overdue from what he promised and I haven't heard from him lately. I guess you should go ahead and take another look and we'll work through it the best we can. HalfGig talk 11:18, 5 May 2017 (UTC)

Second reading

Sminthopsis84 has made a few alterations to the article. I have done some light copyediting, and here are a few more things I noticed:

• "Molecular data show Erythranthe and Diplacus to be distinct evolutionary lines, not each other's closest relative, and apart from strictly defined Mimulus." - How about leaving out the middle phrase and rewording this as "Molecular data show Erythranthe and Diplacus to be distinct evolutionary lines that are distinct from Mimulus as strictly defined."
  • Agree. Changed. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)
  • Agree. Sminthopsis84 (talk) 01:35, 6 May 2017 (UTC)
• "The plant is hairy to slightly hairy and grows from 0.5–3 cm (0.20–1.18 in) tall." - This is about Erythranthe alsinoides and the dimensions are wrong (more likely 5 to 30 cm tall).
  • Good catch! Fixed. Source said dm not cm. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)
• "The flowers are yellow with reddish-brown spots, usually on the lower lip, and have fuse into upper and lower lips" - This sentence needs attention.
  • made fuse past tense. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)
• "Diplacus is clearly derived from within Mimulus s.l. and was not usually considered to be a separate genus." - I don't understand this. What do you mean by "Mimulus s.l."?
  • abbr for "sensu lato", meaning in the broad sense. This is used in botany a lot, as is "sensu stricto", meaning in the strict sense. I've changed to lay terms. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)
• "in central California between 200,000 and 500,000 years ago" - It is customary to put the oldest date first.
  • Done. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)

I think that's all. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 13:03, 5 May 2017 (UTC)

@Cwmhiraeth: Ready for next round. HalfGig talk 13:57, 5 May 2017 (UTC)

GA criteria

• The article is well written and complies with MOS guidelines on prose and grammar, structure and layout.
• The article uses many reliable third-party sources, and makes frequent citations to them. I do not believe it contains original research.
• The article covers the main aspects of the subject and remains focussed.
• The article is neutral.
• The article is stable.
• The images are relevant and have suitable captions, and are either in the public domain or properly licensed.

• Final assessment - I believe this article reaches the GA criteria. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 18:17, 5 May 2017 (UTC)
  • @Cwmhiraeth: Thank you for the most excellent review and understanding. The article is much better now. HalfGig talk 19:51, 5 May 2017 (UTC)