Talk:Finding Winnie

Latest comment: 5 years ago by Guettarda in topic GA Review

GA Review

edit
GA toolbox
Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Finding Winnie/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Guettarda (talk · contribs) 18:13, 23 March 2019 (UTC)Reply


GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):   b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):  
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section):   b (citations to reliable sources):   c (OR):   d (copyvio and plagiarism):  
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):   b (focused):  
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:  
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:  
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales):   b (appropriate use with suitable captions):  
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:  

Review

edit

Nice work on this. Some initial observations

  Done Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • Finding an orphaned female bear ... he becomes Colebourn's regiment's mascot - shouldn't that be "she"?
Yes. Fixed. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
  • This is generally thought not to be the case judging ... the gender of Christopher Robin's doll, Edward. - There's no other mention of this doll, Edward, and I can't figure out the relevance.
Edward was a bear who was also an inspiration for the world of Winnie the Pooh. I added a word. Does this help? Best, Barkeep49 (talk)
It might help to say "later renamed Winnie the Pooh" or something that for people like me who know apparently absolutely nothing ;) Guettarda (talk) 04:48, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
  • Refs 1, 3 & 11 go to Ebsco login pages, and 16 appears to be a search term. I don't think these links are helpful (a paywalled doi link is still helpful if it gives an abstract of first page, but this is just a login page). As is, I don't think these link are very helpful.
Certainly not helpful if you don't have a login - the references do note that they're Ebsco. However, if a person does have access they're able to see my work. I've added the subscription required template. Best, Barkeep49 (talk)

Guettarda (talk) 19:14, 23 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

@Barkeep49: Guettarda (talk) 19:15, 23 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
@Guettarda: Thanks for the review. See my comments above. Best, Barkeep49 (talk) 21:13, 23 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

A few more things

  • The sources I can access call Lindsay Henry's great-granddaughter, not his granddaughter
  • In the "Background and publication" section, you say She was moved to write the book to explain her son's name to him., but her son's name, Cole, is only mentioned in the second paragraph of the "Writing and illustrations" section, and it's never actually said that Cole is the child in the story. Maybe you could change the last sentence of the first paragraph of the "Background and publication" section from She was moved to write the book to explain her son's name to him to say ...to her son Cole's name.... That would make the rest of it a lot clearer.

(And aside, I'm charmed by this story. Thanks for writing this!) Guettarda (talk) 04:48, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply

Guettarda Thanks for the kind words. Both changes made. Best, Barkeep49 (talk) 04:52, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
Looks good. Congratulations! Guettarda (talk) 13:47, 24 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
Guettarda Thanks. Does this mean you're done with the review? I ask because I noticed you haven't yet done the stuff to pass the review. If you are still working on it no worries but I thought I would ping in case that part got skipped. Best, Barkeep49 (talk) 01:04, 25 March 2019 (UTC)Reply
Sorry, I forgot to finish it. Done now. Guettarda (talk) 01:37, 25 March 2019 (UTC)Reply