Talk:Frame & Canvas/GA1

Latest comment: 4 years ago by Kyle Peake in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 14:29, 13 October 2020 (UTC)Reply


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose ( ) 1b. MoS ( ) 2a. ref layout ( ) 2b. cites WP:RS ( ) 2c. no WP:OR ( ) 2d. no WP:CV ( )
3a. broadness ( ) 3b. focus ( ) 4. neutral ( ) 5. stable ( ) 6a. free or tagged images ( ) 6b. pics relevant ( )
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked   are unassessed

I will be sure to keep watch on this next time, so I am aware when you have responded --K. Peake 14:29, 13 October 2020 (UTC)Reply

Infobox and lead

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  • Remove flatlist since it should only be bullet points in the infobox
  • Remove wikilink on studio album
  • Do not need "independent label" introduction for the lead
  • "After the release of" → "After the release of the band's second studio album,"
  • "as he was unable" → "due to him being unable"
  • "Recording took place" → "Recording sessions took place"
  • "December 1997 with J. Robbins helping to produce" → "December 1997, with J. Robbins helping with production during"
  • "Frame & Canvas is an" → "The album is an"
  • "album with lyrics co-written" → "release, for which the lyrics were co-written"
  • "or solely from Nanna." → "or solely wrote by Nanna."
  • "promoted with tours across the US," → "promoted by Braid with tours across the United States,"
  • "Discount and Burning Airlines." → "Discount, and Burning Airlines."
  • "Frame & Canvas received..." remove this sentence since there are not enough reviews to back it up
  • "It would go on to sell over" → "It had sold over"
  • "Frame & Canvas has appeared on best-of album lists" → "The album has appeared on best-of lists"
  • "in publications such as" → "by multiple publications, such as"
  • "NME and Rolling Stone." → "NME, and Rolling Stone."
  • Add a final sentence saying something like "The band performed it in full during a tour across the US in 2012." since this belongs away from the other tours due to being a lot later

Background and production

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  • "Following the release of" → "Following the release of their second studio album"
  • Remove wikilink on Braid since they are the lead artists
  • "played shows around" → "played shows in"
  • "Wisconsin and Missouri" → "Wisconsin, and Missouri"
  • "in February," → "in February 1997,"
  • "left from the band in March." → "left Braid the following month."
  • "Atkinson was a fan" → "Atkinson had been a fan"
  • "Touring continued throughout the year;" → "Braid's touring continued throughout 1997;"
  • "Tomorrow and Compound Red," → "Tomorrow, and Compound Red,"
  • "dropped out as the band was" → "dropped out as they were"
  • ""First Day Back" and "Hugs from Boys"" → "The tracks "First Day Back" and "Hugs from Boys""
  • "the band traveled across the United States with" → "Braid traveled across the US with"
  • "in October." → "in October of that year."
  • "on a 7" vinyl record through" → "on a 7" vinyl, through" with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
  • "and co-founder Darcie Knight" → "and fellow co-founder Darcie Knight"
  • "the band traveled to" → "Braid traveled to"
  • "in Arlington, Virginia," → "in Arlington County, Virginia," with the wikilink
  • "The band had met" → "Braid had met"
  • "work on Frame & Canvas." → "working on the album with him."
  • "served as the engineer" → "served as the engineer for Frame & Canvas"
  • Target mixed to Audio mixing (recorded music)

Composition and lyrics

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  • "acts such as" → "acts, such as"
  • "Jawbox (of which Robbins was a member)." → "Jawbox, the latter of which Robbins was a member of."
  • "the rest with Broach." → "the other five with Broach."
  • "up with the title" → "up with the title of"
  • "said it referred to" → "said the title referred to"
  • "compared to previous releases; he explained it" → "than the band's previous releases; he explained this"
  • "It features Broach" → "The song features Broach"
  • "included references to being an" → "includes references to Braid being an"
  • Wikilink airplay
  • "and settling in after" → "and is about settling in after"
  • "talks about a breakdown" → "talks about breakdowns"
  • ""this cool beat ... immediately once he started playing. 'This is different'."" → ""this cool beat". Nanna stated that "immediately once he started playing", he thought: "This is different.""
  • Wikilink Urbana, Illinois
  • Target Champaign to Champaign, Illinois
  • "street lights in the town" → "street lights in Urbana"
  • "was written with" → "was written along with"
  • "they were making in the basement was happening upstairs." → "Braid were making in the basement was being made upstairs."
  • "According to him," → "According to Broach,"
  • "himself on tour he would compose" → "himself on tour, he would write"

Release and tours

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  • Retitle to Release and promotion
  • "and March 1998," → "and March of 1998,"
  • "on April 7 through" → "on April 7 of that year, through"
  • "with a stint across the United State" → "by performing across the US"
  • "until early May." → "until early May 1998."
  • "The band immediately went" → "Braid immediately went"
  • "throughout May, and various acts in June." → "throughout that month, while they were accompanied various acts in June 1998."
  • "In August, they played" → "In August of that year, the band played"
  • "October and early November." → "October and early November of 1998."
  • "of November and December, the band" → "of November and the following month, Braid"
  • "After a handful of" → "After a number of"
  • "went on a west coast tour" → "embarked on a west coast tour"
  • "throughout April with" → "throughout the following month with"
  • "with Eversor in May." → "with Eversor in May 1999."
  • "In June, the band announced" → "In June of that year, Braid announced"
  • "playing a friend's wedding," → "performing at a friend's wedding,"
  • "shows in August," → "shows in August 1999,"
  • "a hometown performance[2]" → "a hometown performance,[2]"
  • "as the Lucky to Be Alive (2000) live album." → "as their live album Lucky to Be Alive (2000)."
  • "from the band's last five days" → "from Braid's last five days as a band"
  • "included in the band's" → "included in their"

Reception and legacy

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  • "pop melodies"," → "pop melodies" on Frame & Canvas," with the target
  • "which were" → "which he wrote were"
  • "The record cemented itself as one of the band's" → "In the opinion of Blake, the album cemented itself as one of Braid's"
  • "as to say by the end" → "as to say that by the end"
  • "said it was" → "said the album was"
  • "in Atkinson, a" → "in Atkinson, alongside a"
  • "over 16,000 copies." → "over 16,000 copies worldwide."
  • "emo album lists by" → "emo album lists, being named to lists by"
  • Target Vulture to Vulture.com per MOS:LINK2SECT
  • "said the album establish" → "said the album established"
  • "The album was an" → "Frame & Canvas was an"
  • "scene that was based" → "scene, the latter of which was based"
  • "favorite Braid album: "You" → "favorite Braid album, saying: "You"
  • "US tour where they performed" → "US tour, during which they performed"

Track listing

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  • All music by Braid, lyricist noted below in brackets.[11] All songs produced by J. Robbins and Braid.[10] → All music by Braid.[11] All songs produced by J. Robbins and Braid.[10]
  • I have suggested the above change, since you should use the track listing template to lay the tracks out since the writers are known for all of them and see MOS:TABLECAPTION

Personnel

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  • Use div col to place Additional musicians and Production on the right from Braid

References

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Final comments and verdict

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Done. Yeepsi (talk) 16:31, 14 October 2020 (UTC)Reply