Talk:Frances Spatz Leighton/GA1

Latest comment: 3 years ago by Tayi Arajakate in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Tayi Arajakate (talk · contribs) 10:22, 19 July 2021 (UTC)Reply

Comments

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  • Ref 1 and 3 uses FamilySearch, a genealogical site which appears to accept user contributions. The citations should be replaced or removed.
  • While hosted on a site that also accepts user contributions, the records being cited are government records that are not edited by users and we can confirm with secondary sources that they're what we want, s I think they are acceptible.
Alright but if there are secondary sources available for the same information, why not use them? Tayi Arajakate Talk 14:58, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
I meant that we know enough information that we can definitely the primary source is about the right leighton, and only use the primary source for a minor detail. For example, based on secondary sources we know leighton was born September 1919 and married Kendall King Hoyt, the marriage certificate is used to specify her birth to September 4. Eddie891 Talk Work 15:11, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • The full name in the lead, "Frances Spatz Ornstein Leighton" does not appear to be used by any of the sources. She is just referred to as Frances Spatz Leighton and Ornstein is her surname at birth. I couldn't find anything in the sources used where it says how she got "Saptz Leighton" so I would suggest using "born Frances Ornstein" in parenthesis as opposed to using "née".
  • Done I think
I meant using "born" instead of "née" but anyways its not a big deal. Tayi Arajakate Talk 14:58, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
changed Eddie891 Talk Work 15:08, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Its a bit ambiguous if she is being referred to as a writer or ghostwriter. She is also referred to as a journalist, so I would suggest re-writing the first line to "... was an American author, ghostwriter and journalist" and dropping the "best known for" part.
  • Sure
  • "After publishing several successful books, she became a very popular ghostwriter." The "very" should be removed and the line does not directly correspond with the body of the article or the sources. I think something like "She became popular for ghostwriting several memoirs and accounts of Washington D. C. life" would be more accurate going by what's verifiable, it could also be presented as the second line of the article.
  • revised
Your revision looks even better. Tayi Arajakate Talk 14:58, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Consider replacing "... was approached "daily" ..." with "was being frequently approached".
  • done
  • There should be a comma after "Around the same time".
  • added
  • In "then-First Lady of the United States Jacqueline Kennedy", the "then" seems unnecessary as the person with the title is already mentioned by name so I would suggest replacing it with "the" and adding a comma between Jacqueline and States. The line could also be moved to come after the line "Leighton worked with Parks to write My Thirty Years Backstairs at the White House (1961) about her experiences working at the White House and as a child while her mother was."
  • sure
  • Are you sure the two redlinks in the article are notable and should have their own articles?
  • Removed the psychiatrist, kept metro sunday group because it is wanting of a redirect or article
I had missed one, there's also one about John Szostak, what do you think about this one? I can't find anything about him other than the book. Tayi Arajakate Talk 14:58, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
  • Why is the bibliography partial? The Los Angeles Times obituary itself mentions a number of books with a brief description of them which are not mentioned in the article at all.
  • Because there's no complete biography anywhere that I've been able to find, sources just say "over 30". The only particularly relevant book I'm aware of not including was the pat nixon cookbook which is because worldcat has no results for it
Ok but regarding the Pat Nixon Cookbook, I think it can still be included without an identifier. Also the memoir June Allyson is missing from the bibliography. Tayi Arajakate Talk 14:58, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
Added June Allyson, I disagree about Pat Nixon, if it doesn't even have an OCLC that means it's essentially not held in any libraries and doesn't really merit inclusion in a selected bibliography Eddie891 Talk Work 15:15, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply
That's a good point, also in the same vein I think the section should be renamed to "Selected bibliography" instead of partial. Tayi Arajakate Talk 15:22, 23 July 2021 (UTC)Reply

Assessment

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  1. Comprehension: The comprehension is good.
  2.   Pass
    Criteria Notes Result
    (a) (prose) The prose is clear. concise and understandable.   Pass
    (b) (MoS) The article is mostly compliant with the manual of style.   Pass
  3. Verifiability: The article is mostly verifiable.
  4.   Pass
    Criteria Notes Result
    (a) (references) The article has a list of references and in-line citations for all material in the body.   Pass
    (b) (citations to reliable sources) Some clarification needed.   Neutral
    (c) (original research) No original research exists in the article.   Pass
    (d) (copyvio and plagiarism) No plagiarism or copyright violations found.   Pass
  5. Comprehensiveness: The article is adequate in its coverage.
  6.   Pass
    Criteria Notes Result
    (a) (major aspects) Some clarification needed.   Neutral
    (b) (focused) The article remains on topic without unnecessary deviations.   Pass
  7. Neutrality: The article is neutral.
  8.   Pass
    Notes Result
    No neutrality issues were found.   Pass
  9. Stability: The article is stable.
  10.   Pass
    Notes Result
    No ongoing edit warring or content dispute exists.   Pass
  11. Illustration: The article has good illustration.
  12.   Pass
    Criteria Notes Result
    (a) (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales) The image used is tagged and has a valid fair use rationale.   Pass
    (b) (appropriate use with suitable captions) Use is suitable.   Pass