Talk:HMS Gloucester (1909)/GA1
Latest comment: 8 years ago by Cwmhiraeth in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Cwmhiraeth (talk · contribs) 05:28, 30 August 2016 (UTC)
- I propose to review this article. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:28, 30 August 2016 (UTC)
First reading
edit- In general, this is a well-written article about a ship which took part in quite a limited range of actions.
- In general, it does not make clear who was in command of the vessel.
- My sources usually don't tell me who was in command.
- Where does the information in the info box come from?
- It's all sourced in the description section.
- You could mention the compliment of crew in the main body of text.
- Doh!, done.
- "The Bristol sub-class[Note 1] was rated as second-class cruisers" - were rather than was.
- BritEng handling of collective nouns always throws me.
- "This armament was considered rather too light for ships of this size" - by whom?
- Added.
- "As the protective deck was at the waterline, the ships were given a large metacentric height so that they would remain stable in the event of flooding above the armoured deck." - this sentence mixes singular and plural.
- Yes, that's deliberate. The design elements are singular while reference to the ships keeps things from getting monotonous.
- The last sentence in the "Design and description" section needs extra punctuation.
- See if it reads better now.
- "As tensions role with Germany in the first few days of August 1914" - Typo.
- "Therefore, Milne stationed the battlecruiser Inflexible and Indefatigable ..." - This sentence is too long and convoluted.
- Indeed, see how it reads now.
- You do not mention who was in command of Gloucester in 1914.
- Umm, Kelly is mentioned in command during the pursuit of Goeben, which is August 1914.
- "... landing 100 Royal Marines." - Do you mean that Gloucester went to Galway in order to land the marines?
- It seems so, although I don't have detailed enough info to specifically state that.
- You mention Beatty at the Battle of Jutland, but you do not state who he was.
- Good catch.
- That's all for now. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:00, 31 August 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks for reviewing this.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:00, 31 August 2016 (UTC)
- That's all for now. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 06:00, 31 August 2016 (UTC)
I am happy with the changes made and think this article meets the GA criteria. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:44, 31 August 2016 (UTC)