Talk:HMS Mohawk (F31)/GA1
Latest comment: 3 years ago by Sturmvogel 66 in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 07:24, 5 December 2020 (UTC)
- ", although the throwers were not mounted in all ships;[9] Twenty" - You'll want a period instead of the semicolon, I believe.
- Oops
- Do we know if Mohawk was one of the ones fitted with the throwers or not?
- Unknown
- Laid down date varies between infobox and prose
- "When the Fascist Italy" - Drop the "the", maybe?
- "while Mohawk and the destroyer Kelly working up" - I feel like you're missing a word in here
- Can't imagine why!
- Is it worth mentioning the bombing incident that killed or wounded 45 crewman in the lead?
- Maybe, but I went ahead and did it any way.
- "an inaccurate spot report of a German battlecruiser and cruiser that afternoon, forestalled the searches as the destroyers were recalled" - Is the comma in here necessary?
- "during a bombardment of near Bardia, Italian Libya," - There's either one too few or one too many words here, not for sure.
- "but they were detached at dusk on 28 March to find and sink the badly damaged Vittorio Veneto" - Can you gloss the type of ship Vittorio Veneto was?
Other than that, it looks fine to me. Hog Farm Bacon 00:09, 6 December 2020 (UTC)
- Nice to hear. See if I've addressed everything satisfactorily.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 12:25, 9 December 2020 (UTC)