Talk:Hannah Dodd/GA1
Latest comment: 8 years ago by The Rambling Man in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 08:17, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
Comments
- Not sure the nickname of the Australian national wheelchair basketball team is needed in the lead.
- } removed. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- The lead is a little brief, you should expand it to cover each of the sections.
- Expanded. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "She has sacral agenesis and spina bifida with upper limb dystonia,[2][3][4][5][6] " are five references really needed here?
- Reduced to one. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "who ride horses" is this important? Do they do it for a job?
- Deleted the last clause. It was only to note that horse riding runs in the family. Many people don't ride horses much these days. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "caliper" is a dab link.
- corrected. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "As of 2012" it's now late 2015, is she still doing those things?
- Yes, she is. I'll update the article when something changes. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "Because of her disability, " which particular part?
- Not sure. Deleted that phrase. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Her date of birth is incorrect.
- No, it's right. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Not according to this. The Rambling Man (talk) 10:55, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- That's a typo. It is 27 April. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:12, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- And this? How do you know which one is correct? The Rambling Man (talk) 11:30, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- I asked her of course. (Can you read her Facebook page?) Hawkeye7 (talk) 19:58, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Well since two RS say otherwise, I think you need a note to explain that they are in error. And no, I can't read her Facebook page. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:13, 4 September 2015 (UTC)
- Added a note explaining that the APC page contains a typo. I'll ask the APC to fix the page. Hannah had John Vandenberg correct the date when we spoke with her on 20 July last year. Hawkeye7 (talk) 07:40, 4 September 2015 (UTC)
- I don't doubt you're right, but since we have conflicting RSs and since I noticed it, we need to address it, so thanks for doing that. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:57, 4 September 2015 (UTC)
- Added a note explaining that the APC page contains a typo. I'll ask the APC to fix the page. Hannah had John Vandenberg correct the date when we spoke with her on 20 July last year. Hawkeye7 (talk) 07:40, 4 September 2015 (UTC)
- Well since two RS say otherwise, I think you need a note to explain that they are in error. And no, I can't read her Facebook page. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:13, 4 September 2015 (UTC)
- I asked her of course. (Can you read her Facebook page?) Hawkeye7 (talk) 19:58, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- And this? How do you know which one is correct? The Rambling Man (talk) 11:30, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- That's a typo. It is 27 April. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:12, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Not according to this. The Rambling Man (talk) 10:55, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- No, it's right. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- [2][4][6] again and again, is there any need for three references for each sentence?
- Done Trimmed them back. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "She was able to ride on her own, before she learned to walk, by the time she was two years old." reorder.
- Second para of the Equestrian section is very clunky with lots of very short sentences, it makes for uncomfortable reading.
- Yeah. Gone over it again to smooth things out a bit more. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- "After London," meh, would prefer to see "After the London Olympics" or similar.
- " U25" spell it out.
- "In 2015, her classification was dropped to a 2.0." unreferenced.
- Added. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- This seems to have more information that could be included (e.g. competing in England in 2006).
- Added. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Shouldn't "Hills Shire Times" etc be in italics?
- Be consistent with reference author names, either "first last" or "last, first" but not a mixture.
- Why Wanganuichronicle.co.nz when Wanganui Chronicle seems to be consistent?
- Daily Telegraph needs a location as there are different publications around the world with the same title.
- Really? I didn't think it was that good. Disambiguated. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
A few issues so I'll put it on hold. The Rambling Man (talk) 08:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks for your review. Hawkeye7 (talk) 10:51, 3 September 2015 (UTC)
All good now, so I've passed it. Nice work. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:59, 4 September 2015 (UTC)