Talk:Hans Philipp/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by Seabuckthorn in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Seabuckthorn (talk · contribs) 10:04, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
Nominator: MisterBee1966 (talk)

Hi! My review for this article will be here shortly.   --Seabuckthorn  10:04, 11 February 2014 (UTC)Reply


1: Well-written

Check for WP:LEAD:  

  1. Check for Correct Structure of Lead Section:     Done
  2. Check for Citations (WP:LEADCITE):     Done
  3. Check for Introductory text:     Done
    • Check for Provide an accessible overview (MOS:INTRO):     Done  
      • Major Point 1: Childhood and education "Born in Meissen,[Note 1] Philipp grew up in the Weimar Republic and Third Reich" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 2: Early career "and volunteered for military service in the Wehrmacht in 1936. Following flight training, he was posted to Jagdgeschwader 76 (JG 76—76th Fighter Wing)" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
      • Major Point 3: World War II "and participated in the Invasion of Poland and as a Staffelkapitän (squadron leader) in the Battle of France. His unit was reformed to II./Jagdgeschwader 54 (JG 54—54th Fighter Wing) in June 1940." (summarised well in the lead)   (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body, the Battle of Britain should be summarized.)  
        • Major Point 3.1: Battle of Britain "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body)  
        • Major Point 3.2: Balkans campaign and Operation Barbarossa "He then fought in the aerial battles of the Balkans Campaign and Operation Barbarossa, the German invasion of the Soviet Union. He received the Knight's Cross of the Iron Cross with Oak Leaves (Ritterkreuz des Eisernen Kreuzes mit Eichenlaub) after 62 aerial victories on 24 August 1941" (summarised well in the lead)  
        • Major Point 3.3: Eastern Front "and the Swords (Schwerter) to his Knight's Cross on 12 March 1942, his score now at 86 aerial victories. He claimed his 100th victory on 31 March 1942, the fourth fighter pilot to achieve this mark,[Note 2] and his 150th aerial victory on 14 January 1943. Philipp claimed four aircraft shot down on 17 March 1943 taking his total to 203 aerial victories. He thus surpassed Hermann Graf as the leading German fighter pilot at the time, and six months after Graf, became the second pilot to claim more than 200 victories." (summarised well in the lead)  
        • Major Point 3.4: Geschwaderkommodore of JG 1 and death "Philipp was promoted to Major (major) and given command as a Geschwaderkommodore (wing commander) of Jagdgeschwader 1 (JG 1—1st Fighter Wing) on 1 April 1943, operating in Defense of the Reich against the United States Army Air Forces (USAAF). He was promoted to Oberstleutnant (lieutenant colonel) on 1 October 1943 and was killed in action a week later on 8 October during an attack on Bremen. It is believed that he was shot down by the P-47 Thunderbolt pilot Robert S. Johnson. Philipp managed to bail out but his parachute failed to open." (summarised well in the lead)  
    • Check for Relative emphasis:     Done  
      • Major Point 1: Childhood and education "Born in Meissen,[Note 1] Philipp grew up in the Weimar Republic and Third Reich" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 2: Early career "and volunteered for military service in the Wehrmacht in 1936. Following flight training, he was posted to Jagdgeschwader 76 (JG 76—76th Fighter Wing)" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
      • Major Point 3: World War II "and participated in the Invasion of Poland and as a Staffelkapitän (squadron leader) in the Battle of France. His unit was reformed to II./Jagdgeschwader 54 (JG 54—54th Fighter Wing) in June 1940." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body, the Battle of Britain should be summarized.)  
        • done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC)Reply
        • Major Point 3.1: Battle of Britain "" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body)  
        • Major Point 3.2: Balkans campaign and Operation Barbarossa "He then fought in the aerial battles of the Balkans Campaign and Operation Barbarossa, the German invasion of the Soviet Union. He received the Knight's Cross of the Iron Cross with Oak Leaves (Ritterkreuz des Eisernen Kreuzes mit Eichenlaub) after 62 aerial victories on 24 August 1941" (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body)  
        • Major Point 3.3: Eastern Front "and the Swords (Schwerter) to his Knight's Cross on 12 March 1942, his score now at 86 aerial victories. He claimed his 100th victory on 31 March 1942, the fourth fighter pilot to achieve this mark,[Note 2] and his 150th aerial victory on 14 January 1943. Philipp claimed four aircraft shot down on 17 March 1943 taking his total to 203 aerial victories. He thus surpassed Hermann Graf as the leading German fighter pilot at the time, and six months after Graf, became the second pilot to claim more than 200 victories." (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body)  
        • Major Point 3.4: Geschwaderkommodore of JG 1 and death "Philipp was promoted to Major (major) and given command as a Geschwaderkommodore (wing commander) of Jagdgeschwader 1 (JG 1—1st Fighter Wing) on 1 April 1943, operating in Defense of the Reich against the United States Army Air Forces (USAAF). He was promoted to Oberstleutnant (lieutenant colonel) on 1 October 1943 and was killed in action a week later on 8 October during an attack on Bremen. It is believed that he was shot down by the P-47 Thunderbolt pilot Robert S. Johnson. Philipp managed to bail out but his parachute failed to open." (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body)  
    • Check for Opening paragraph (MOS:BEGIN):     Done
      • Check for First sentence (WP:LEADSENTENCE):     Done
        • "Hans Philipp (17 March 1917 – 8 October 1943) was a German Luftwaffe fighter ace during World War II."
      • Check for Format of the first sentence (MOS:BOLDTITLE):     Done
      • Check for Proper names and titles:     Done
      • Check for Abbreviations and synonyms (MOS:BOLDSYN):   None
      • Check for Foreign language (MOS:FORLANG):   None
      • Check for Pronunciation:   None
      • Check for Contextual links (MOS:CONTEXTLINK):     Done
      • Check for Biographies:   NA
      • Check for Organisms:   NA
  4. Check for Biographies of living persons:   NA
  5. Check for Alternative names (MOS:LEADALT):     Done
    • Check for Non-English titles:  
    • Check for Usage in first sentence:  
    • Check for Separate section usage:  
  6. Check for Length (WP:LEADLENGTH):     Done
  7. Check for Clutter (WP:LEADCLUTTER):   None
  Done

Check for WP:LAYOUT:     Done

  1. Check for Body sections: WP:BODY, MOS:BODY.     Done
    • Check for Headings and sections:     Done
    • Check for Section templates and summary style:     Done
    • Check for Paragraphs (MOS:PARAGRAPHS):     Done
  2. Check for Standard appendices and footers (MOS:APPENDIX):     Done
    • Check for Order of sections (WP:ORDER):     Done
    • Check for Works or publications:     Done
    • Check for See also section (MOS:SEEALSO):     Done
    • Check for Notes and references (WP:FNNR):     Done
    • Check for Further reading (WP:FURTHER):     Done
    • Check for External links (WP:LAYOUTEL):     Done
    • Check for Links to sister projects:     Done
    • Check for Navigation templates:     Done
  3. Check for Formatting:     Done
    • Check for Images (WP:LAYIM):     Done
    • Check for Links:     Done
    • Check for Horizontal rule (WP:LINE):     Done
WP:WTW:  
  Done

Check for WP:WTW:     Done

  1. Check for Words that may introduce bias:     Done
    • Check for Puffery (WP:PEA):     Done
    • Check for Contentious labels (WP:LABEL):     Done
    • Check for Unsupported attributions (WP:WEASEL):     Done
    • Check for Expressions of doubt (WP:ALLEGED):     Done
    • Check for Editorializing (MOS:OPED):     Done
    • Check for Synonyms for said (WP:SAY):     Done
  2. Check for Expressions that lack precision:     Done
    • Check for Euphemisms (WP:EUPHEMISM):     Done
    • Check for Clichés and idioms (WP:IDIOM):     Done
    • Check for Relative time references (WP:REALTIME):     Done
    • Check for Neologisms (WP:PEA):   None
  3. Check for Offensive material (WP:F***):     Done

Check for WP:MOSFICT:     Done

  1. Check for Real-world perspective (WP:Real world):     Done
    • Check for Primary and secondary information (WP:PASI):     Done
    • Check for Contextual presentation (MOS:PLOT):     Done
  Done
  1. Prose is preferred over list (WP:PROSE):  
  2. Check for Tables (MOS:TABLES):  


2: Verifiable with no original research

WP:RS:  
  Done

Check for WP:RS:     Done

Cross-checked with the other FAs: Heinrich Bär, Helmut Lent, Werner Mölders, Ernst Lindemann

  1. Check for the material (WP:RSVETTING):   (contentious)   Done
    • Is it contentious?:   Yes
    • Does the ref indeed support the material?:  
  2. Check for the author (WP:RSVETTING):     Done
    • Who is the author?:  
    • Does the author have a Wikipedia article?:  
    • What are the author's academic credentials and professional experience?:  
    • What else has the author published?:  
    • Is the author, or this work, cited in other reliable sources? In academic works?:  
  3. Check for the publication (WP:RSVETTING):     Done
  4. Check for Self-published sources (WP:SPS):  
  Done

Check for inline citations WP:MINREF:     Done

  1. Check for Direct quotations:     Done
  2. Check for Likely to be challenged:     Done
  3. Check for Contentious material about living persons (WP:BLP):   NA
WP:NOR:  
  Done
  1. Check for primary sources (WP:PRIMARY):     Done
  2. Check for synthesis (WP:SYN):     Done
  3. Check for original images (WP:OI):     Done


3: Broad in its coverage

  Done

Cross-checked with the other FAs: Heinrich Bär, Helmut Lent, Werner Mölders, Ernst Lindemann

  1. Check for Article scope as defined by reliable sources:  
    1. Check for The extent of the subject matter in these RS:  
    2. Check for Out of scope:  
  2. Check for The range of material that belongs in the article:  
    1. Check for All material that is notable is covered:  
    2. Check for All material that is referenced is covered:  
    3. Check for All material that a reader would be likely to agree matches the specified scope is covered:  
    4. Check for The most general scope that summarises essentially all knowledge:  
    5. Check for Stay on topic and no wandering off-topic (WP:OFFTOPIC):  
b. Focused:  
  Done
  1. Check for Readability issues (WP:LENGTH):  
  2. Check for Article size (WP:TOO LONG!):  


4: Neutral

  Done

4. Fair representation without bias:     Done

  1. Check for POV (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  2. Check for naming (WP:POVNAMING):     Done
  3. Check for structure (WP:STRUCTURE):     Done
  4. Check for Due and undue weight (WP:DUE):     Done
  5. Check for Balancing aspects (WP:BALASPS):     Done
  6. Check for Giving "equal validity" (WP:VALID):     Done
  7. Check for Balance (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  8. Check for Impartial tone (WP:IMPARTIAL):     Done
  9. Check for Describing aesthetic opinions (WP:SUBJECTIVE):     Done
  10. Check for Words to watch (WP:YESPOV):     Done
  11. Check for Attributing and specifying biased statements (WP:ATTRIBUTEPOV):     Done
  12. Check for Fringe theories and pseudoscience (WP:PSCI):   None
  13. Check for Religion (WP:RNPOV):   None


5: Stable: No edit wars, etc:   Yes

6: Images   Done (NFC with a valid FUR) & (PD)

Images:  
  Done

6: Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:     Done

  1. Check for copyright tags (WP:TAGS):     Done
  2. Check for copyright status:     Done
  3. Check for non-free content (WP:NFC):     Done
  4. Check for valid fair use rationales (WP:FUR):     Done

6: Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:     Done

  1. Check for image relevance (WP:IMAGE RELEVANCE):     Done
  2. Check for Images for the lead (WP:LEADIMAGE):     Done
  3. Check for suitable captions (WP:CAPTION):     Done


MisterBee1966, I'm very happy and inspired to see your work here. I do have some insights based on the above checklist that I think will improve the article:

  • I think the lead can be improved in order to provide an accessible overview and to give relative emphasis.
  • I think the list can be converted to prose.

Besides that, I think the article looks excellent. Please feel free to strike out any recommendation from this review which you think will not help in improving the article which is our main aim here. All the best,   --Seabuckthorn  06:29, 17 February 2014 (UTC)Reply

Promoting the article to GA status.   --Seabuckthorn  18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC)Reply