Talk:Harlem riot of 1943

Latest comment: 7 years ago by 69.255.12.16 in topic biased language

Corinbot

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I used the references as template but the work is my own and I used it to incorporate into copy I took from the article: Harlem on the subject of the Harlem Riot of 1943.

CSD Nomination rationale

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The text is mostly copy / pasted verbatim from http://socyberty.com/history/new-york-city-riot-of-1943/ and otherwise only barely paraphrased and still in infringement. No non-infringing version to revert to. MLauba (talk) 13:28, 30 July 2009 (UTC)Reply

Bigotry

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To any African American, Latino or other interested party. After looking at this person's user page it is quite clear that MLauba has issues with ethnic minorities. They are a Rules lawyer who is using their position to censure articles that don't adhere to their politics.

Like this one.

Racists today no longer where white capes and pointy hats, they just pretend to be upholding truth, honesty and integrity. And that is why there is no longer an article on this page. —Preceding unsigned comment added by 86.130.120.53 (talk) 15:18, 1 August 2009 (UTC)Reply

In reality, the reason there is no article visible on this page at present is that its content appears to have been copied from another source, and only barely paraphrased, which is putting the project at legal risk. The article may also be restored once the copyright concerns have been addressed. The rule being addressed here is WP:C, politics have nothing to do with it. MLauba (talk) 18:06, 1 August 2009 (UTC)Reply
Note that a new version, sans copyright concerns, is now available for review / improvement at the temporary subpage. MLauba (talk) 13:37, 2 August 2009 (UTC)Reply
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From your friendly hard working bot.—cyberbot II NotifyOnline 19:55, 8 December 2013 (UTC)Reply

Wrong name?

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The first paragraph starts about Robert Bandy, but then talks about someone named Brady twice. I assume that this is a simple spelling error, but I am not familiar with this subject, so could someone with more knowledge fix the error? Omegastar (talk) 17:24, 21 June 2014 (UTC)Reply

Yes, his name is Bandy. Thank you for the note. Seattle (talk) 19:47, 21 June 2014 (UTC)Reply

GA Review

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GA toolbox
Reviewing
This review is transcluded from Talk:Harlem Riot of 1943/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 20:27, 7 July 2014 (UTC)Reply


I'll take this review. The Rambling Man (talk) 20:27, 7 July 2014 (UTC)Reply

Comments

  • No dab pages beside the required one at the top, a couple of redirects but no action required specifically (U.S. Army, Red Cross and "segregation of blacks in the armed forces" could be fixed if other fixes nearby are happening).
    • Changed links, Red Cross actually linked to the wrong target article.
  • References, where online, check out, those with subscription needed are correctly marked.
    • OK.
  • Image has adequate fair use rationale and is used exclusively in the article for which the rationale has been provided.
    • OK.
  • Never keen on things "occuring", it seems so passive to me, would it not be better to say "took place"?
    • Changed.
  • "release a woman " by now it's "the" woman.
    • Sure.
  • "led to between $250,000–$5,000,000 in damages" possibly too detailed for the lead especially considering the 20-fold range. Perhaps a rephrase to suggest considerable costly damage was done.
    • I'd rather leave it in, it gives readers a range of the damages along with the specific mentions of the deaths and arrests.
  • "in his c. 1943–1944 work," again, I think this is a little unncessary detailed for the lead.
    • OK.
  • First sentence of the "Cause" section has seven commas. It reads rather stilted to me.
    • Moved things around a bit, how's that?
  • "housing prostitutes" just to clarify, do you mean they lived there, offered their services there or something else?
    • Reworded.
  • "the new accommodations did " maybe it's USEng, but I don't see why accomodation needs to be plural here.
    • Agreed, changed.
  • "to loudly protest" I'm no expert but that looks like a split infinitive to me. Although, reading our own article, it seems that, these days, the split infinitive is just dandy...
    • Changed.
  • "Polite to leave, Polite became ..." replace the second Polite with "she" to avoid repetition; there's no uncertainty here.
    • Yes, changed.
  • Lead says "gathered around Bandy and the officer as they attempted to enter a hospital" but the Cause section seems to state that the crowds gathered outside the hospital as Bandy was being treated for his superficial wound.
    • Tried to clarify.
  • "The crowd combined..." where?
    • Changed to "crowds", can't be sure, Capeci 1977 doesn't specify other than "combined" and Lawrence 1947 just mentions the rumors. Probably a loose combination of the crowds.
  • "the crowd became violent after an individual threw a bottle off of a roof, into the crowd " reads awkwardly with the two mentions of the crowd.
    • Removed the comma, how's that?
  • "disseminated " do you mean "dispersed"?
    • OK.
  • Throughout, you capitalise PM, our MOS:TIME seems to imply it should be just pm.
    • Changed.
  • "Go home– now!" in the message, a space before the en-dash would be nice.
    • Sure.
  • " as his father's funeral and nineteenth birthday" his father was 19? Or " as his father's funeral and his nineteenth birthday"?
    • The latter.

That's it for my first pass. The Rambling Man (talk) 07:25, 8 July 2014 (UTC)Reply

@The Rambling Man:, replied. Seattle (talk) 15:21, 8 July 2014 (UTC)Reply

All good here, not just a well-written article but an interesting one too. Thanks for allowing me to be involved. Promoting. The Rambling Man (talk) 18:55, 9 July 2014 (UTC)Reply

biased language

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The use of "inquired" in the first paragraph sounds like a biased interpretation of events. Maybe "witnessed a woman's arrest" --69.255.12.16 (talk) 23:20, 8 January 2017 (UTC)Reply