Talk:Hasan al-Kharrat/GA1

Latest comment: 11 years ago by Al Ameer son in topic GA Review

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hchc2009 (talk · contribs) 10:05, 11 May 2013 (UTC)Reply

I'll read through properly later and begin the review then. Looks interesting! Hchc2009 (talk) 10:05, 11 May 2013 (UTC)Reply

Well written and researched. Some minor prose points below, apart from that it's good to go. Hchc2009 (talk) 09:50, 12 May 2013 (UTC)Reply
All done - will pass in a moment. Many thanks for an excellent article! Hchc2009 (talk) 17:26, 14 May 2013 (UTC)Reply
Thanks for taking the time to review it ;) Cheers! --Al Ameer son (talk) 01:15, 15 May 2013 (UTC)Reply

Well-written:

(a) the prose is clear and concise, respects copyright laws, and the spelling and grammar are correct;

  • "After withdrawing from Damascus, which was severely bombarded by French forces, al-Kharrat would continue to lead forays against French positions in and around Damascus until being killed in a French ambush in the Ghouta." - "al-Kharrat continued to lead" would put it in the active form.
  • "Because of his efforts against French rule and his death in that struggle, al-Kharrat is considered a hero by Syrians until the present day." - I'd advise against beginning a sentence with "Because..." - "Due to his efforts..."?
  • "Al-Kharrat would eventually serve as the night watchman" - it is unclear from this when he served as the night watchman.
  • "In the mid-summer of 1925 Sultan Pasha al-Atrash rallied his Druze fighters and launched a revolt against French rule in Jabal al-Arab after three other prominent Druze leaders were invited to Damascus only to be imprisoned by the French authorities." A long sentence - worth breaking in two.
  • "Because of the diversity and independence of the various rebel factions, centralized order and oversight was difficult to establish. " - again, I'd caution against starting with because. "Centralized order and oversight were difficult to establish because of the diversity and independence of the various rebel factions."?
  • " His men would continue to fight the French for the remainder of the revolt" - "His men continued to fight..."
  • "Al-Kharrat and his son Fakhri are still considered a "martyred heroes" among Syrians " - "still considered "martyred heroes".
  • Done. For the most part at least. The sources I've been able to access do not appear to include the year he started his role as a night watchman, but Provence indicates he continued until his participation in the revolt in late 1925, which I noted in the article. Otherwise, I think I've addressed the rest of the prose issues completely. --Al Ameer son (talk) 16:34, 12 May 2013 (UTC)Reply

(b) it complies with the manual of style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.

Factually accurate and verifiable:

(a) it provides references to all sources of information in the section(s) dedicated to the attribution of these sources according to the guide to layout;

(b) it provides in-line citations from reliable sources for direct quotations, statistics, published opinion, counter-intuitive or controversial statements that are challenged or likely to be challenged, and contentious material relating to living persons—science-based articles should follow the scientific citation guidelines;

(c) it contains no original research.

Broad in its coverage:

(a) it addresses the main aspects of the topic;

(b) it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).

Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without bias, giving due weight to each.

Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.

Illustrated, if possible, by images:

(a) images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content;

(b) images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.