Talk:How We Do (Party)/GA1
Latest comment: 2 years ago by Iaof2017 in topic GA Review
GA Review
editGA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:11, 5 October 2022 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
|
I have quite a bit of time, so it is ideal to get on with this large GAN! --K. Peake 07:11, 5 October 2022 (UTC)
Infobox and lead
edit- Infobox looks good!
The lead single part should be a sentence after writing/production, however keep the inclusion on her album in the first sentence but remove wikilink on studio albumLowercase the Monarch and the Runners per MOS:THEMUSIC"from Notorious B.I.G.'s single "Party and Bullshit" (1993), it" → "from the Notorious B.I.G.'s "Party and Bullshit", it" with the wikilinkMaybe remove the on the floor part since that is a bit much detail for the lead; if not then reword to be less repetitiveMove the critical reception sentence to being in the first para because this lead can be cut down to twoThe Japan position needs to be written out in prose since everything in the lead doesThe North American performance sentence is out of order; place the Hot 100 first, followed by the Dance Club Songs chart and Canada"It attained a gold certification by" → "It attained gold certifications by" and mention the countries all of these were inRemove the 140,000 units part since that is not notable here""How We Do (Party)" received moderate response from Music critics, with some applauding the song's music and sound, and others comparing" → "The song received moderate responses from music critics, who mostly applauded the music and sound, while others compared"Merge the third para with the second oneRemove "for the song" after accompanying music video because this implies thatChanged the uploaded to her channel part to merely released per too much detail for the leadI'm not sure if among others is appropriate language or if the sentence is even useful when only two reviewers are included, also the lipstick is not mentioned by any of them"including the The Jonathan Ross Show," → "including The Jonathan Ross Show,"
Background and composition
editThe writing and production should come first, as this obviously happens before releaseRemove the comma before Ora"Several remixes, including by" → "Several remixes, including ones by"Lowercase the Monarch and the Runners per MOS:THEMUSIC"Musically, it is a" → "Musically, "How We Do (Party)" is a" also, make this the sentence before the vocal range since genre is most significant and start a new para for compMention along with the love interest part that she sings over acoustic guitar with the wikilink
Critical reception
edit"was met with moderate response" → "was met with moderate responses""partying, empowerment, and romance."" → "partying, empowerment, and romance"." per MOS:QUOTE"from the same website, opined that" → "from the same website opined that"Italicise GQ"commended its appeal as a" → "commended the song's appeal as""For Digital Spy, Robert Copsey declared it a" → "For Digital Spy, Robert Copsey declared the song a"The song years are not in the quote so either add using [] or separate from the author's words, also don't use speech marks inside onesItalicise MusicOMHWhy does The Washington Post quote use a comma when the source uses a dash?
Commercial performance
editAre you sure the Czech Republic position is notable for prose?Mention the New Zealand Singles Chart by nameMention the respective countries it was awarded those certifications inName the chart as the Hot 100 rather than the Hot 100 Singles"the Dance Club Songs and" → "the Dance Club Songs chart and"
Music video
editShouldn't the img say lipstick rather than lips per the source?Only use the word official once in the opening sentence"perform along to the song" are you sure this is appropriate language?"while using their torsos" → "where she uses their torsos"Simply write American singers before both of the compared artists since that is their identity"Evans and Stefani."" → "Evans and Stefani"." per MOS:QUOTE"As of Lansky, from the aforementioned website," → "For the aforementioned website's Lansky,""red lips and" → "red lipstick and"
Live performances
editRemove the opening sentence since this single para mentions a 2013 performance"On 1 May, she performed" → "On 1 May 2012, Ora performed""In the following" what is this supposed to mean?Identify as BBC Radio 1's Hackney Weekend"On 18 August," → "On 18 August 2012,"Mention that the Jingle Bell Ball performance of the song was a closer"on 17 September" → "on 17 September 2012"
Copyright infringement suit
edit- Maybe this should be merged with the above section since they are only one para each and title something like Live performances and controversy?
- Wouldn't that part fit better at the 'Background and composition' or 'Critical reception' section? Iaof2017 (talk) 13:32, 6 October 2022 (UTC)
Lowercase the Last Poets and the Notorious B.I.G. per MOS:THEMUSICRemove the release year of "Party and Bullshit" because it is mentioned earlier in the article"published and distributed" → "publish[ed] and distribute[d]" per the source"except his permission." → "without his permission."""challenge and encourage people to not waste" → ""challenge[] and encourage[] people to NOT waste""the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York judge" → "the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York judge" per MOS:USSurround 'to something glorified' with singular quotation marks
Track listing
edit- Good
Charts
editWeekly charts
editCIS should not be piped to the countryWikilink Euro Digital Song Sales to itself per MOS:LINK2SECTRemove Bubbling Under Hot 100 Singles and Radio Songs per WP:USCHARTS
Year-end charts
edit- Good
Certifications
edit- Good
Release history
editLabel → Label(s)
See also
editList of number-one dance singles of 2012 (United States) → List of Billboard Dance Club Songs number ones of 2012 with the pipe
References
edit- Copyvio score looks too high at 44.8%;
cut down quoting from ref 7 to fix this Wikilink Spotify on ref 3Wikilink Digital Spy on ref 13Cite MusicOMH as work/website instead on ref 15Official Charts → Official Charts Company on ref 17 with the wikilinkCite Complex as work/website instead on refs 44 and 49, piping to Complex (magazine) per MOS:LINK2SECTRemove or replace ref 45 since that is not a reliable source
Final comments and verdict
edit- On hold until all of the issues are fixed! --K. Peake 11:12, 6 October 2022 (UTC)
- Hello @Kyle Peake: thank you for this somewhat longer review. I've responded to all of your concerns! Iaof2017 (talk) 13:46, 6 October 2022 (UTC)
- Iaof2017 Upon further consideration, I believe that critical and commercial reception should be one section since they are only a para each, also see MOS:LINK2SECT to understand that you wikilink Euro Digital Song Sales. --K. Peake 14:02, 6 October 2022 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Done. Wouldn't it be better to merge 'Music video' and 'Live performances' into one 'Promotion' section? Iaof2017 (talk) 16:31, 6 October 2022 (UTC)
- Iaof2017 ✓ Pass now, honestly I feel those are better set apart since the first is two paras. --K. Peake 07:14, 8 October 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you again for the review. :D Iaof2017 (talk) 11:17, 8 October 2022 (UTC)