Talk:I Invented Sex

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:I Invented Sex/GA2. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: CallMeNathan • Talk2Me 19:17, 13 October 2010 (UTC)

Lead

• "I Invented Sex" is a song by American R&B singer Trey Songz. It features Canadian recording artist Drake. - Making this one sentence would be better, such as "I Invented Sex is a song by American R&B singer Trey Songz, and features Canadian recording artist Drake." or something similar.

Done

• The song was written by the two with Tony Scales and its producer, Los Da Mystro. - Would be better "Together, they wrote the song alongside Tony Scales and ...."

Done

• It was released to urban airplay as the third single from Songz' third studio album Ready on October 13, 2009. - Re-write. You say "third" twice, and it should be urban airplay stations.

Partially done. I don't see any issue with using 'third' twice.

I re-edited because urban airplay stations is very incorrect. MediaBase outlets such as AllAccess and FMQB dub a song going for adds as being available or release to "airplay" Candyo32 02:42, 19 October 2010 (UTC)

• sensual feel - Sensual message?

Done

• reached forty-two - reached number forty-two

Done

• Is there a source for where is was recorded?

The liner notes. I've added the information into the background so it could be sourced outside the infobox. Candyo32 00:11, 17 October 2010 (UTC)

Background

• of R&B group - From the, or of the

Don't see the problem here

I think I see what Adabow meant. But Day26 isn't a member from the group or the group, Day26 is the group. Candyo32 00:09, 17 October 2010 (UTC)

Composition

• Looks good

Chart performance

• debuted on the Billboard Hot 100 at number ninety - debuted at number ninety....

Done

• It spent twenty weeks on the chart, with the chart stay spanning from 2009 to 2010, with it falling off the chart on the week ending March 10, 2010 - Re-write for clarity

Done

• The song also topped the Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Songs chart, making it Songz' first number one the chart - don't mention chart twice in a sentence

Done

Music video

• It carries a parental advisory warning. Drake does not appear in the music video. - It reads like a list

Done

Live performances

• Drake joined Songz to perform it at West Hollywood's House of Blues in January - Re-write

Done

• Almost every sentence begins with "he performed it" and "he again performed it". - You should switch it up a bit.

Overall, good job Candy. These fixes shouldn't take you long. Drop me off a message when your done :)--CallMeNathan • Talk2Me 19:44, 13 October 2010 (UTC)

I've jumped in so that you can finally get this GT done, Candyo. There are still a few things to do, though. Adabow (talk · contribs) 23:53, 16 October 2010 (UTC)

I think everything has been addressed now. Candyo32 14:18, 17 October 2010 (UTC)

The article Passed--CallMeNathan • Talk2Me 00:12, 20 October 2010 (UTC)

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