Talk:Internet Leaks/GA1
Latest comment: 8 years ago by MarioSoulTruthFan in topic GA Review
GA Review
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Reviewer: MarioSoulTruthFan (talk · contribs) 12:34, 22 October 2016 (UTC)
Hello, I'll be review your article soon. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 12:34, 22 October 2016 (UTC)
Infobox
edit- The size of the cover should be reduced to at least 300x300.
- Should have caption.
- Is that necessary for an album, since it's assumed that the image is of the album cover?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- I meant alt, my bad here. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:21, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Who produced the album?
- "The first single released from Internet Leaks was, "Whatever You Like" a parody of T.I.'s song of the same name." → not included in here.
Done
Lead
edit- The EP contains a parody of → It contains a parody of
- At the time of the release of Internet Leaks → At the time of the EP release
- Seems like a pretty weak lead to me. Misses information such as: exploration of digital distribution, a little more regarding the reviews, the compostion of the songs, the style/genre of this album ,references to the other music videos as said above.
- I will work on that.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 18:01, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Nothing was done regarding adding more information to the lead, also add the peak of the Chart performance. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:35, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Are you sure this is the third? It looks like the second to me! MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:37, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
Done
Background and recording
edit- a means → a mean
- I'm pretty sure it should be 'means', since 'a mean' is a synonym for average, whereas 'a means' is a way to accomplish something.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 18:00, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Both are correct, actually. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:26, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- later told Billboard → when?
- The single was recorded on September 26, 2008, and uploaded to digital distribution platforms on October 8, 2008 → wrong date and was first made available exclusively on iTunes for two weeks before other platforms, according to the billboard information.
- The first three sentences seem quite repetitive with the same cadence →Yankovic...Yankovic... try to variety here, improve.
- I tried to cut that down some.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Backing Yankovic → Backing him
- For "Craiglist", Yankovic → For "Craiglist", the singer
- Yankovic first → The artist first
- I just cut down on other instances of Yankovic so as to allow this one.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- although each of the songs on Internet Leaks—sans "Ringtone", which was released the same days as Internet Leaks—had been released as singles preceding the release of the EP. → although each song on Internet Leaks but "Ringtone", which was released the same days as Internet Leaks, had been made available as singles preceding the release of the EP.
- Changed with slight modification.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- re-released → included
Done
Composition
edit- No need for such big images, thump size would be more than enough.
- I dropped their size.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Due to celerity with which Yankovic → Due to the celebrity with which Yankovic? I have no clue what you are trying to say here...
- 'the' was missing before celerity.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- As such, the song explicitly references the Great Recession, which occurred in 2009. → The song explicitly references the Great Recession, which occurred in 2009.
- Done.--17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Following "Whatever You Like", Yankovic released "Craigslist" on June 16, 2009. → reference?
- "Skipper Dan", a style parody of Weezer, was released on July 14, 2009. → as a Single? + reference.
- pen the song" → cute but not very encyclopedic
- Changed.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- after he and his family went on the Disneyland Jungle Cruise ride → after going on a ride on the Disneyland Jungle Cruise with his family; link Disneyland Jungle Cruise
- Changed.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- 'Well, here's a song right here.'" → "Well, here's a song right here."" Not on given source.
- Whoops! Wrong AV Club source.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- On August 4, 2009, Yankovic released "CNR" → Same as previous
- with Rolling Stone specifically noting the influence of the 2007 single "Icky Thump" → you also quote Billboard, which is it gonna be?
- Billboard is there supporting that it's a White Stripes spoof, and the RS source is the one specifically picking out a song.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- The final single, "Ringtone", released on August 25, 2009. → One more time
Done
Music videos
edit- The first video released was for "Craiglist", directed by Liam Lynch. → The first music video released was for the track "Craiglist", directed by Liam Lynch.
- Be aware of the ridirct of the "green screen".
- As long as it leads to where it needs to go, I don't see the issue, but I explicitly linked it to "Chroma key".--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Directed and created by is totally different a director might not create and in the former case he directed and animated, which is different.
- In early August of the same year, a video for "CNR", created by JibJab, was released that animated the song using JibJab employees as actors against a green screen, interspersed with shots of Yankovic and Jon "Bermuda" Schwartz performing on a White Stripes-inspired red-and-white set, dressed as Jack White and Meg White, respectively → In early August of the same year, a video for "CNR", directed and animated by JibJab, was released. The animation used JibJab employees as actors against a green screen. It was interspersed with shots of Yankovic and Jon "Bermuda" Schwartz performing on a White Stripes-inspired red-and-white set, dressed as Jack White and Meg White, respectively.
- created by SuperNews! → needless to say
- I changed to 'animated'.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Lastly, → Finally,
- the video was released in 2011 → being released in 2011 and was included on...
- I just rewrote it in a different way.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
Done
Reception
edit- The songs on the EP were largely favorably received. → The songs on the EP were favorably received.
- "highlight" → use your own words
- Yankovic leaving the shackles of parody behind, and simply crafting funny, memorable tunes, free of shtick or a sell-by date"; Wild also positively complimented the song's darker nature → this quote is quite long use your own words in between
- Matt Wild felt that the parody was "funny and pointed" → from which publication?
- You go back and forth with the reviews, they should be sequential.
- I've ordered them in terms of topic discussed. It starts off with a generic discussion of the EP, and the moves to what particular critics say about certain things.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- On December 2, 2009, the EP was nominated for Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album for the 52nd Grammy Awards → The record was nominated for Best Comedy Album at the 52nd Annual Grammy Awards.
Done
Track listing
edit- The following is adapted from the iTunes version of the album, as well as the liner notes from Alpocalypse → Is there any diference?If not you can leave the former reference.
- It's not really needed, so I just removed it.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- You need them, just use the one that has the credits as well. See below the reason. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:32, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- Use the Itunes metadata its better because Apocalypse has more engineers and other writers, but I only need those who did those songs. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:50, 26 October 2016 (UTC)
- I changed it for the personnel but not the track listing, since that one isn't necessary.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:52, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
- Use the Itunes metadata its better because Apocalypse has more engineers and other writers, but I only need those who did those songs. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:50, 26 October 2016 (UTC)
- You need them, just use the one that has the credits as well. See below the reason. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:32, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
Done
References
edit- Rolling Stone reference #14 redirects to the main site.
- Should be fixed now.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- PopCrush is not a reliable source.
- Removed.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- I advise you to archive every source (the ones which are not).
- Good idea. Shall get to that.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- WeirdAl.com. → WeirdAl official website
- Only wikilink the articles once → Billboard is two times
- You can link JibJab, despite that being a blog, not sure how reliable it is.
- Done. It's also the official production blog, so I assume it's OK.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- The A.V. Club and its publisher is linked twice, no need for that. The same goes for Rolling Stone. Be aware of Billboard references, some mess with the names, publisher, issues on A.V. Club. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:49, 26 October 2016 (UTC)
- Not really, I fixed the first for you, do the same for the others. No double links, no publishers unless you choose to add publishers to all of them, work is mandatory and no double links. These are the main problems, see Billboard, A.V. Club and Wordpress references. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:50, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
Overall GA review
edit- I know the album charted but I see no evidence of such.
- No credits or personal section? I know that Yankovic does a lot, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't master or mixes his own songs.
- I need a reference for that kind of information. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 19:28, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- On hold for seven days, good luck. Ping me when you are done. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:42, 24 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: I believe that I have changed and/or responded to all the things that you suggested.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Gen. Quon: There are some issues left that I have raised meanwhile and some that have yet to be addressed. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:02, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: Sorry about those minor issues. How about now?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 13:37, 26 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Gen. Quon: There are some issues left that I have raised meanwhile and some that have yet to be addressed. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:02, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: I believe that I have changed and/or responded to all the things that you suggested.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:57, 25 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Gen. Quon: Some of them are still there. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 20:50, 26 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: OK, how about now?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:54, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Gen. Quon: you missed a section. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:50, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: Is the reference formatting section the only one left? If so, I think I have done what you want (although I will point out that per the GA requirements, they do not have to be perfect).--Gen. Quon (Talk) 13:25, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Gen. Quon: you missed a section. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 21:50, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
- @MarioSoulTruthFan: OK, how about now?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 17:54, 27 October 2016 (UTC)
I just asked for consistency. Now passing. MarioSoulTruthFan (talk) 18:54, 29 October 2016 (UTC)