Talk:Jessie Stephen/GA1

Latest comment: 10 years ago by Dudley Miles in topic GA Review

GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.

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Reviewer: Dudley Miles (talk · contribs) 15:46, 27 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

Dudley Miles (talk) 16:36, 27 April 2014 (UTC)Reply

Happy to consider any further comments. Thanks. -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 07:46, 1 May 2014 (UTC)Reply

A minor point is that the heading 'Later life' looks to me a bit odd to me as it starts when she was under 30, but I cannot think of a better heading. Dudley Miles (talk) 16:58, 1 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
How about Political career and later life? -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 19:41, 1 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
Looking at it again, all the sections cover a variety of aspects. The Workers' rights section also covers political activities. How about renaming it Early career, the next section something like Middle years and Later life just for the last paragraph (with the 1964 election transferred to it).
  Done[6] Good idea. -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 20:19, 3 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
"arguing against the use of force (in connection with issues surrounding the formation of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics)" seems a bit clumsy. How about something like "opposing the use of force against the Russian Revolution"? Dudley Miles (talk) 20:30, 1 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
  Done[7] This should read a little better and maybe the new wikilinked article is more appropriate too. If not, the link to Union of Soviet Socialist Republics can be reinstated. -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 20:19, 3 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • I have made a few more copy edits - of course change them if you are not happy.
  • It might be worth adding the MBE and the blue plaque to the lead.
      Done[8] -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 02:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • "she held meetings with the public including migrant English domestic workers". Meetings with the public sounds a bit clumsy. According to ODNB she conducted lecture tours of the US in Canada in 1924 and 1926, where she encouraged unionisation of migrant workers and raised substantial funds for the Socialist Party of America. There seems to some discrepancy in sources, as below it appears to be one tour in 1922.
      Done[9] -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 02:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Stephen was considered to be one of the "most active members" (along with Emma Boyce, around 1916) of the Workers' Suffrage Federation,[12] after being approached by Sylvia Pankhurst and moving from Glasgow to London." I think this sentence is the wrong way round - she was approached and then she moved.
      Done[10] -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 02:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
  • Sorry to keep raising new points. I think it is nearly there. Dudley Miles (talk) 18:12, 6 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
    Thanks very much for the further suggestions. I was hoping to have dealt with them yesterday but it'll now have to wait a short while longer. If you feel the need to formally place this on hold, please do so. In any case, I plan to return to this within 24 hours. Thanks for your patience. -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 09:55, 8 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
    Right, that's those bits taken care of, I believe. Thanks. -- Trevj (talk · contribs) 02:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
That all looks fine. I have passed it now. Dudley Miles (talk) 09:47, 9 May 2014 (UTC)Reply
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.