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Talk:Jimmy Floyd Hasselbaink/GA1

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Latest comment: 9 years ago by EchetusXe in topic GA Review

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Reviewer: Cloudz679 (talk · contribs) 21:05, 14 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

lead

  • "helping the club to the final of the Copa del Rey"..."helped the club to the 2002 FA Cup Final"..."helped the club to the final of the UEFA Cup in 2006"
  • "debut season" seems to be misleading, as it was not his first season in the PL
  • suggest the link points to "2002 FA Cup Final" and not "FA Cup"
  • suggest linking 2008 edition

body

  • "Surinam" typo?
  • GVO (Gestaagt Volharding Overwint), ZFC (Zaansche Football club) should be the other way around
  • right-winger or right winger?
  • He was kicked out of the youth team at DWS - where is the context here? Is that a prison team?
  • "Head Coach Niels Overweg kicked him out of the club" tone
  • "Head Coach" or "head coach"?
  • link "trial", particularly useful given the context
  • 2nd para: he, his, him, he, he, he, he. No name? This is a distraction throughout the article, but nowhere more so than here. The prose should refer to the individual consistently and unambiguously throughout.
  • "a trial spell"
  • "1995–96 season", "1996–97 season", "1999–2000 season", "2000–01 season", "2001–02 season", "2002–03 season", "2003–04 season" and more should all be linked, not just the years
  • "Hasselbaink was signed by Boavista for a €300,000 fee" when?
  • "as the chairman got through three managers" prose
  • "only managed a disappointing seventh-place finish" POV?
  • link hat-trick
  • "He scored his first professional hat-trick at the club, in a victory over Marítimo at the Estádio do Bessa; he later scored a hat-trick in a big win over Gil Vicente, as did teammate Nuno Gomes." scores?
  • "The final of the Taça de Portugal was against Benfica at the Estádio Nacional, and though head coach Casaca left him on the bench due to his arranged transfer to Leeds, Hasselbaink entered the game as a late substitute for Erwin Sánchez as Boavista held on to a 3–1 win." prose
  • "He scored on his Premier League debut against Arsenal at Elland Road on 9 August" score?
  • "He scored only five league goals by Christmas" had scored...by or scored...before
  • "in the next year's UEFA Champions League qualification stages" following year's
  • "win points for the club"?
  • "the El Derbi madrileño" use English
  • "He also scored against Barcelona at Camp Nou" - score? result? competition?
  • "and his successor Radomir Antić's stewardship saw the club relegated into the Segunda División" prose
  • "Despite this he shared the league's Silver Boot award" is there really a Silver Boot award, it sounds like something made up. "He" seems to refer to Antic in this context.
  • "They reached the final" Atletico reached...
  • The info about the relegation would be best placed immediately before the details regarding his departure from the club
  • some terms are overlinked, i.e. linked more than once. Most commonly UEFA Champions League, Premier League, Arsenal, Chelsea, Stamford Bridge, Middlesbrough
  • "running focused" or "running-focused"?
  • "Barcelona manager Louis van Gaal agreed an £8 million transfer for Hasselbaink in the January transfer window but was sacked before the transfer went through and the deal subsequently collapsed" is there an additional reference for this?
  • "both legs" link?
  • why is "the club's top-scorer" linking to "list of Middlesbrough seasons"?
  • "for next year's UEFA Cup" the following year's
  • "enough to qualify the club" enough for the club to qualify
  • "in the 2005–06" season
  • "new manager Gareth Southgate released him in July 2006" clubs release players, not managers
  • no mention of his Premier League season and nine goals in 05/06
  • "After a long goal drought" prose
  • "He was released by Charlton at the end of the 2006–07 season" should mention he scored just twice in 25 league appearances. Also it appears he scored 2 in a LC match against Chesterfield that season
  • "player of the round" should be capitalised
  • "After an impressive performance against Wolverhampton Wanderers in the fifth round of the FA Cup he was nominated for the player of the round after a goal which he powered the ball in to the top corner." prose
  • "He remained as a regular starter for the "Bluebirds" throughout the 2007–08 season, and made appearances in five of the six matches Cardiff played to reach the FA Cup final for the first time in 81 years, which they went on to lose 1–0 to Portsmouth, where he played 70 minutes before being substituted for Steve Thompson.[67]" prose
  • The whole Cardiff section appears to be incomplete
  • "On 1 June he scored his first goal in a 5–1 victory over Paraguay, and a few days later scored his second goal in another 5–1 victory over Nigeria." friendlies I take it?
  • sent-off or sent off?
  • in fourth-place or in fourth place?
  • "assistant Frank Rijkaard, who froze Hasselbaink out of the international picture" prose
  • "He had been part of the 25 man initial squad but was dropped from the final 22" he wasn't in the final 22 so can't have been dropped from it
  • "He returned to the international fold" prose
  • Style of play is apparently incomplete
  • "having left the club when manager Sean O'Driscoll was sacked" leaving the club
  • "Four days after his appointment he managed Burton for the first time" managing isn't something only done on game days
  • "He was nominated for the League Two Manager of the Month award in January..." did he win it?
  • "His elder brother Carlos was also a professional footballer, making him the uncle of Nigel Hasselbaink, also a professional footballer." doesn't seem to follow
    • "His elder brother Carlos was also a professional footballer, and his nephew Nigel Hasselbaink is also a professional footballer." reword
  • Where are the Royal Antwerp management stats source from?
  • I don't believe the list of goals should be hidden by default, nor right-aligned.
  • The 00/01 Golden Boot is apparently not referenced
  • The 98/99 Golden Boot should be noted as (shared)
  • Why is Fourth Place at WC98 in the "Honours" section?
  • Where is the "Floyd" part of his name from? It is not mentioned, even in his official name.
    • The given reference (fn5) seems to denote it as part of his nickname and not official name. The four-four-two source is a good one, so recommend removing fn5. C679 09:00, 17 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • I will look more closely at referencing after the above has been addressed, on hold to allow time to make changes. C679 09:56, 15 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • Honours section is still not in line with similar articles as mentioned before. Manager stats for Royal Antwerp need to be sourced or removed. Referencing check to follow. C679 12:18, 20 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • Plus, of course, that there is no evidence that fourth place is an honour. If something can be shown to prove otherwise, I am open to it. C679 12:21, 20 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • Why is there info about his nephew in the opening paragraph?
  • fn3 is used to support his height as 1.78 but he is listed there as 1.83
  • what makes fn13 [2] a reliable source?
  • what makes fn36 [3] a reliable source?
  • "a volley from outside the penalty area against Manchester United" not referenced
  • "However manager Gianluca Vialli was sacked in September, and Hasselbaink's former Madrid boss Claudio Ranieri was appointed as his replacement." is this in 00-01 or 01-02? Both look unikely given the positioning of the sentence.
  • "he scored a hat-trick as Chelsea defeated Tottenham Hotspur 3–0." reference says it was 4-0
  • "helping Guðjohnsen to 23" seems to be POV, especially since this is referenced to his own biography.
  • "after 68 minutes" seems to be in the 68th minute or after 67 minutes according to the reference
  • "Ranieri initiated a rotation policy" squad rotation system and link
  • His 15 goals in 2002-03 seem to have been completely glossed over.
  • "Chelsea finished the season in second place and reached the semi-finals of the Champions League, and Hasselbaink played in both legs of the defeat to AS Monaco." reword to clarify those matches were at the semi-final stage

C679 18:35, 20 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

  • "In July 2004, Hasselbaink turned down an approach from AC Milan and instead remained in England to join Middlesbrough on a two-year contract after a free transfer." could we have an independent reference here?
  • "He helped Steve McClaren's "Boro" to defeat Skoda Xanthi (Greece), Grasshopper Club Zürich (Switzerland), Dnipro Dnipropetrovsk (Ukraine), AZ (Netherlands), Litex (Bulgaria), VfB Stuttgart (Germany), A.S. Roma (Italy), FC Basel (Switzerland) and Steaua București (Romania) en route to the UEFA Cup final." Boro didn't defeat AZ, the match was 0-0.
  • "The FA" is the FA
  • "He scored his first goal for the "Addicks" against his old team Chelsea at Stamford Bridge on 9 September. +result
  • "despite being a "a pain in the backside at times""
  • "On 19 September, Hasselbaink scored his first goal for Cardiff with a 20-yard low drive in the 2–1 league defeat to Watford at Ninian Park." +ref

C679 18:43, 20 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

  • what makes fn73 [4] a reliable source?
  • what makes fn82 [5] a reliable source?
  • "most notable of which being former England under-19 international John Bostock." POV?
  • "His elder brother Carlos is also a former professional footballer, and Carlos's son Nigel Hasselbaink is also a professional footballer." prose still needs work here
  • Club stats would benefit from inline citations. The review is now complete. C679 20:56, 20 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
OK, done all that, thanks.--EchetusXe 13:05, 21 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • No Transfermarkt please. Also spot checked the refs for the stats - and the European stats for Boavista are not included at the supplied footnote. In 97/98 Leeds "other" stats do not match the footnote cited. I stopped there after finding two inaccuracies. Please go through the whole club stats section once more. C679 20:42, 21 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
Right, slight variation between sources so I went with the more comprehensive sources. National Football Teams for early years, Soccerbase for more modern era and RSSSF covers early European appearances.--EchetusXe 14:51, 23 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
  • Stats are still inconsistent:
    • 1999/00 National Cup shows 6 (4) but the provided reference shows 2 (2)
    • 2005/06 shows 44 (17) total stats but the provided reference shows 44 (18)

C679 07:19, 24 April 2015 (UTC)Reply

OK right, fixed that.--EchetusXe 13:19, 25 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
OK, that looks to have been done now.--EchetusXe 21:02, 26 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
OK, changed that.--EchetusXe 09:06, 27 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
OK, changed that.--EchetusXe 12:07, 27 April 2015 (UTC)Reply
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